(I)
I love my little sister, Amanda. She has every reason to be angry with me, but, in my defense, I did not know that it was going to go down like that. And before you start judging, let me explain.
She's been dating Terrance for the past five years. Together, they have two kids, Hazel and Lil TJ. But apparently, not together, there is no telling how many unknown kids he has. He was constantly cheating on her. And I think because she always forgave him, he kept taking the opportunities to "try" new women. On the occasions where he would slip up and she would catch him, he would apologize, and whisper sweet nothings into her ears, and convince her that she is still his number one lady and that he doesn't want to be with anyone but her. And she believed him. It was like she was brainwashed.
"He might step out from time to time, but he always comes back home to me.", she said.
I replied, "Why does that make it ohkay? He should not be stepping out on you at all. You are worth so much more than that. You deserve someone who loves and respects you enough to not give other women attention."
But she just brushed me off and that was the end of that conversation.
(II)
Now, I will admit that discovering the neighbor's daughter was completely by accident, at first. I had gone over to visit Amanda one day and there were about five, maybe six, kids playing in the neighbor's front yard. They were some cute, fun kids. I enjoy watching kids play because they are so young and still so innocent. It makes me smile. But there was this one little girl that just caught my eye. She couldn't have been no more than two years old, but she stopped me in my tracks.
"OH. MY. GOD!", I thought, "She looks just like Terrance."
I rushed to get Amanda so she could see for herself, but she was in denial. She wasn't seeing what I was seeing. It was like we were looking at two different pictures.
"That little girl looks nothing like Terrance.", she defended.
"She is a spitting image of that man. She even resembles Hazel.", I rebuttal.
But she was not here for it. How could she be so blind when the proof was right there in her face? So, I took it upon myself to find out because Amanda clearly didn't care. A few days later, I went to talk to the neighbor. The neighbor's name was Veena. I did not sugar code the conversation. I was very blunt, but polite, about what I wanted to know because I did not want her to think that this was a joke.
"Hi. I'm Yolanda. My sister lives next door. I saw your daughter outside the other day, and I couldn't help but notice how much she looks like my sister's boyfriend. She wouldn't happen to be his daughter, right?", I asked.
"Why is that any of your business?", is how she chose to respond.
"It's my business because that's my little sister and I'm not about to have anybody out here have her looking stupid", I replied with some base in my voice.
"Well, that's sounds like a "you" problem.", she replied.
Right then and there, I wanted to punch her so hard, directly in her nose. But I simply walked away. She wanted to make the situation a lot harder than what it had to be. Instead of giving me a simple "yes" or "no" answer, she wanted to be difficult.
So, I waited until she left home, and I broke into her house. I made sure I wasn't seen, I used gloves, and I wore socks, not shoes. I got in by finding a bedroom window that wasn't locked. All I wanted was a little piece of the daughter's DNA. I had found a hairbrush covered with Disney Princess stickers. I figured this was the brush used on her daughter's hair. I took a Ziploc bag I had found inside the house and took a few strands of hair. And then, just for fun, I wrecked her house. I made it look like a burglary had taken place. I threw clothes everywhere and knocked stuff off their dressers. I took small items like her new flatirons, her dresses, her towels, and a few other items. To secure the burglary theory, I left the microwave on the side of the house and a couple feet down, I left their DVD player. By doing this, I was hoping that the police would assume that burglars were trying to take more than they could carry and left behind the items they couldn't. I eventually cut up her dresses and got rid of anything else I took that was hers. Nevertheless, it would be hard to identify who burglarized the house, without any evidence. I made sure I pulled the window back down and I left. It did not have to be that way. All I wanted was a little bit of cooperation. You never know the kind of day a person may be having, so being mean and aggressive is not always the way to go. So she brought that action upon herself.
To make a long story short, with Veena's daughter hair strands and with Terrance's hair strands, which were not hard to obtain at all, I knew a guy who could get me the DNA results. Within a few days, I had proof that Veena's daughter was Terrance's baby. I wanted to give Terrance the opportunity to be a man and own up to his mistake. So, I approached him and demanded he told my sister that he was sleeping with the neighbor and that her daughter was his baby. It was better for her to hear it from him with her own ears, and from out his mouth. And if not, I had no problem with showing her the DNA results. One way or another, she was going to find out.
About a week later, he did come clean and told Amanda that he was messing around with Veena on and off for about five months before she got pregnant. Once she got pregnant, he got scared. He knew he had messed up because it is a lot harder to deny cheating when there is a baby involved. He had stopped calling her around and he was avoiding her all that time. He explained to her that he wanted nothing more to do with Veena or her daughter. And sad to say, Amanda was ohkay with Terrance's decision to pretend that Veena's daughter didn't exist. They moved into a new house the following month and just like that, Veena and her daughter was nonexistent.
Amanda had me feeling so sorry for that girl. Terrance chose to cheat on her constantly with this woman, got her pregnant, and then gone make her raise that child by herself, as if she created it by herself. Terrance did not have to own up to his mistakes that day and it caused a drift between Amanda and I. How could she condone that? And why would she even tolerate that kind of behavior? But I couldn't imagine life without her so, overtime, my sister and I had rekindled our relationship, and we were back on a talking basis.
(III)
I still remember when she came crying to me about Terrance and Alexis. Alexis been Amanda's best friend since middle school. They used to be so close, but Terrance messed that up. Alexis met Terrance when she brought her daughter to Hazel's 4th birthday party. Everything was cool. Alexis didn't even talk to Terrance the whole time she was there. A little over a year later, Amanda comes home early from work to find Terrance and Alexis in the shower together. She could not believe it. Amanda had caught Terrance before with nude photos of other women and hidden chat rooms with provocative language, but she had never actually caught him in the act before. They all started freaking out. Alexis rushing out of the shower, crying and rambling at Amanda. And out of nowhere, Amanda starts punching her in the face. Alexis fell to the floor and Amanda had got on top of her and continued to punch her. Terrance stepped in and pulled her off Alexis, but once he did that, her attention shifted to him. Now, she starts throwing punches at him. Never did he hit her back, but he did subdue her by holding her from the back until she had calmed down, so they could talk. She calmed down, they talked, she left, and came to me.
"I saw them with my own eyes, Yolanda. How could they do this to me? This is a new level of hurt.", she cried.
I asked, "Was it a one-time thing or had it been going on for a while?"
"Girl, they been seeing each other for the past year, and that baby she just had four months ago, it's his baby", she responded.
I felt bad for her. I comforted her the best I could. I thought this was the last straw for her because he cheated on her with someone she knew, and it hit her deeper than any other time he cheated on her. But that was not the case at all. Two months later, she had completely stopped talking to Alexis and Terrance was back in the house.
"So, you forgave him but not her?", I asked.
"He apologized and I honestly believe he meant it. This was the tragedy that's gone make him change. He seen how hurt I was, and I truly believe he learned his lesson. Things will be better now. As for her, she should have known better. We have been best friends since we were kids. I thought we had a code. I'm not saying she's wrong and he's not, but I am more hurt by her than I am by him, so for right now, she can kick rocks and drown in a lake for all I care," she responded.
"And why do you think that is, Amanda? You should be just as hurt by him as you are by her. You know that cheating is what he does. None of this is new information. It was just a matter of time before he made it to someone you knew. And as a "professional" cheater, I think he should have known not to cheat on you with someone you know. There is an equal amount of blame to share between the both of them", I said, but then regretted saying afterwards.
She just rolled her eyes and walked away. Why couldn't she see this man for who he truly was. He had her wrapped around his finger and it was so frustrating. A few months later, she announced his proposal and was so excited to be getting married to him. That is when I started freaking out. I could not let my little sister marry this scumbag. He will continue to hurt and humiliate her over and over again. It's who he was. She was not able to see his true nature, but I could. Marriage is a serious matter. I knew there was no way of talking her out of the marriage, so I already knew that I was going to have to take drastic measures to make sure that this wedding did not happen.
(IV)
They had planned to get married that following Saturday. Everyone was so happy for her and shared her excitement. But that's because they didn't know how much of a scumbag Terrance really was. She always came to me crying about Terrance sneaking around. I knew everything because she told me everything.
Then I thought about the time she told me about Terrance and his brother getting into a bar fight, two weeks prior, that left a man paralyzed from the neck down. I thought if I gave my guy a photo of Terrance, he would use his connects so that the victim could make a positive ID of who was involved. Once he was in custody, I knew there was no way Terrance was going to give up his brother. I figured he would not talk and would just be charged with assault or aggravated battery. I knew this was only a temporary fix since jail time would only be 90 days to 6 months, but it would still give me more time to talk my sister out of the marriage. So, I did what I had to do for her. But then, my guy came back and told me that the victim did not make a positive ID. So getting him arrested was a bust. After doing all that I could over the next few days, I finally gave up. I had come to terms with knowing that my sister was actually going to marry this philanderer.
(V)
The day of the wedding, I just wanted to be her support system. She looked so beautiful in her wedding dress. I was actually happy for her. And then, about twenty minutes into the wedding ceremony, three cops walk through the door, two policewomen and one policeman. They arrested Terrance and read him his rights. My eyes got so big, and my heart started racing. What the heck was happening? First off, the arrest was supposed to be made before the wedding even occurred. The whole point of the arrest was to prevent the wedding, but even still, I thought no arrest could be made since the victim couldn't ID Terrance.
Apparently, one of the female cops met Terrance years ago. They were in a committed relationship until he met Amanda. Amanda was the original side chick. He started hooking up with her when the cop was pregnant with their second child. And then, when she gave birth, he disappeared with Amanda and the cop never saw him again, until my guy showed her the picture of Terrance. Even though some time had passed, the cop recognized him almost immediately, but, at the time, she did not make that known. All she said was to leave it up to her. My guy said she was the best and he trusted her, so I thought I was in good hands. I didn't know she had a vendetta against Terrance. I was just as surprised as everybody else. I was used in this situation and was completely side balled. Humiliating my sister was never a part of the plan. But it was always a part of that cop's plan. She lied to my guy, telling him that the victim could not place Terrance at the scene, when the truth was, it only took him five seconds to ID Terrance. That cop had planned to arrest Terrance at the wedding, in front of everybody, and especially in front of Amanda.
You should have seen the look on the cop's face. She was so thrilled to destroy Amanda's happiness. This was her plan all along and I had no idea. She came in right when the pastor asked if anyone had something to say or to forever hold their peace. My guy said nothing about her being that ruthless. And then I seen the look on Amanda's face. I can't even accurately describe the look on her face because there was so much going on within that look. I saw distraught and anger, overpowered by hurt and embarrassment. Her groom was being hauled off to jail and her wedding was ruined.
I actually would have gotten away with the whole thing, as far as Amanda not knowing I was the one that put Terrance's arrest into motion, but as the cop walked past me, she looks directly at me and said, "thanks for the tip".
"Why would she say that?", I thought, as I felt Amanda's eyes glaring at me.
"You did this?", Amanda asked with tears filling her eyes.
"I'm so sorry. This wasn't supposed to happen," I pleaded.
I asked the cop how she knew the tip came from me and her only response was "I'm a cop" and she winked at me with a smirk on her face, as she walked away. The cop's vendetta ran deep. Not only did she want to destroy Amanda's happiness with Terrance, she also just wanted to destroy Amanda's life, even if that meant destroying the close relationship she had with her older sister, who also helped get her groom arrested. She didn't want Amanda to be happy at all. She wanted her to be miserable in every possible way. I will never forget the way Amanda looked at me. She looked betrayed and I actually felt like I did betray her. I wished I had found a different route to prevent the wedding, but I was desperate. One of the most memorable days in a woman's life, it won't be remembered how it was supposed to be remembered. I never meant to hurt her, not like that. I was trying to save her, but all I did was cause her more pain.
(VI)
I miss her so much. She doesn't call or text or respond to my calls or text. It's been two years since I last heard from her. There is nothing more I can do now but wait for her. I am giving her the space she needs and when she is ready to talk, I will be right here. I do hope that one day I will have the chance to talk to her again, the things I will tell her.
"Amanda, I am deeply sorry. I take full responsibility for your hurt and your pain and I want to help fix what I broke. I know what I did was unforgivable, and I am not expecting us to recover overnight, but I am willing to take the necessary steps to rekindle what we had. I love you forever and please forgive me."
