OH, let's start by saying something before we go any farther. Since I feel most of you have never read the books Karl and I have been working on for the last few years, I should probably explain a tiny bit before I confuse absolutely everybody. Actually...I think only the first book is even out right now. See? I almost got ahead of myself already. Karl says I do that. I tell chapter twelve while everyone else is still standing on chapter one, wondering where the snacks are. Anyway, I grew up on an island and had absolutely no idea what everyone called civilization was really like until my Karl came and took me home with him for forty-eight hours. Forty-eight hours. That was all it took to completely turn my whole life upside down. Looking back now, I almost laugh because I thought I was just taking a little trip. Nope. Surprise, Julie! Entirely new life. How, you ask? Nice try, my little sleuths. That story belongs inside Karl's books, and if I tell you everything now he'll give me that reporter look over the top of his glasses. You know the one. The one that says, "My bride...spoilers." So I shall be a very good girl and leave that adventure where it belongs...for now.
So now let me tell you about my Karl. Oh, I could probably spend twenty papers talking about him, but he would get embarrassed, so I suppose I should behave myself a little. You see, just like me, everything changed for Karl when he turned thirty-five. The funny part is he had absolutely no idea he was special. Nobody was there to explain any of it to him the way my parents explained things to me growing up. So instead, poor Karl just kept attracting every strange, impossible, creepy, mysterious thing the universe could throw at him and thought, "Well...that was odd." Then another odd thing happened. Then another. Eventually he did what reporters always do. He started writing everything down because facts do not forget nearly as much as people do. That became his own collection of files, and the first eleven of those are the little Way Out stories many of you have already seen. So if you ever wondered why Karl writes the way he does, there you go. He is not trying to tell scary stories. He is trying to leave breadcrumbs so somebody else might survive something he already walked through. I think that is actually one of the reasons I fell in love with him. Well...one of about a million reasons.
So now we can finally get back to the fun part, which is what my Karl can actually do. And I have to tell you right away, his powers are nothing at all like mine. Mine are...well...a little flashy sometimes. His are quieter. Sneakier. They are the kind that make you stop afterward and say, "Wait a minute...how in the world did you know that?" But when Karl and I are together...oh, that changes everything for both of us. Separately we are useful. Together we become something entirely different. That is why I always tell people not to think of us as two separate pieces. We really are one team. One bond. One very strange married couple who somehow keeps surviving things we probably should not. We both received our gifts after we received our very special rings, but I am not stealing Volume Two away from Karl either. He earned that story, and besides, I rather enjoy making all of you wait just a little. Builds character. Or impatience. One of the two. So, all right, everyone, let us start showing you exactly why my Karl is every bit as special as I keep telling you he is.
First off, I have to explain how Karl can write everything with such unbelievable detail. People ask me all the time, "Julie, how does he remember conversations from years ago?" My answer is always exactly the same. Because the biggest pain in my adorable little rear is also one of the greatest gifts anyone has ever been given. You see, Karl does not remember things the way you and I do. My memories wander around looking for each other. Sometimes I walk into a room and completely forget why I went there. Then I remember halfway back to the kitchen. Then I forget again because I saw a butterfly. Karl? Oh no. His mind is like carrying around the world's most perfect recorder every second of every day. Everything he sees. Everything he hears. Everything gets filed away somewhere inside that enormous brain of his.
Now before you all start wishing you had that gift too...careful what you wish for! It sounds wonderful until you actually live with somebody who has it. Imagine trying to surprise the man you love. Forget it. Absolutely forget it. The second I start acting even a little suspicious, he starts putting tiny clues together. "Julie...why were you smiling?" "Julie...why did you move that chair?" "Julie...why are there cake crumbs on your shirt?" Honestly, I cannot get away with anything. If I hide his birthday present, somehow he remembers seeing that exact wrapping paper three weeks earlier on the top shelf in the closet behind the old blanket I forgot we even owned. It is honestly unfair. I tell him all the time he has a Big Head. Not outside, mind you. His hat still fits perfectly. Inside. There must be endless shelves in there storing everything. Two lifetimes of memories, all lined up in perfect little rows waiting for Karl to open the correct drawer. Meanwhile I am over here wondering where I left my reading glasses...while they are sitting on top of my own head. So yes, everyone, I officially call his first superpower MEMORY EXPANSION, and believe me when I say it has solved mysteries that nobody else on Earth could have solved because Karl can pull out one tiny clue from a year ago and suddenly fit it perfectly into something happening today. That is not just remembering. That is building puzzles one piece at a time without ever throwing the box away.
The next power my Karl has is the ability to contact everyone on the Hive with what is going on and send urgent messages to anyone who might be able to help him. I call it his SOS power because that is exactly what it reminds me of. Although, to be fair, it is not just one-way communication. Sometimes little bits of information can come back to him too. Never great long conversations, mind you. More like tiny nudges. A location. A time. A warning. Just enough to point us in the right direction. Believe me, when someone sends back, "Left," instead of "Right," that can be the difference between getting out alive or becoming somebody else's mystery.
That little gift has saved our bacon more times than I can count. Yes, I said bacon. Karl says it makes people smile. One time we were sinking into quicksand. Another time we were trapped inside a giant iron ball without so much as an air hole to breathe through. I still have no idea why bad people always build such uncomfortable prisons. If you are going to lock someone up, at least put in a chair. Anyway, even though no air could get in or out, somehow Karl's distress signal still found its way through. Help came, and yes, we survived. Otherwise, this would be a very short paper that simply ended with, "Well...that didn't work out." That would have been disappointing for everybody.
The best way I can explain it is that there seems to be a mental connection with whoever is closest. Karl never has to stop and think about sending it. The message simply leaves him, reaches another person, and then keeps traveling from one mind to the next until it finally arrives where it needs to go. Sometimes the message is as simple as, "The witch is on the move." Sometimes it is only a feeling that something is terribly wrong. Either way, everyone who receives it understands they need to pay attention.
Karl explained it to me by comparing it to a game they played as children called Telephone. I still giggle every time I picture my Karl as a little boy. Can you imagine that? Tiny little fedora. Tiny little notebook. Probably interviewing frogs about neighborhood politics. I honestly cannot picture him without that reporter brain already working. Anyway, in the game, one child whispers a sentence into another child's ear. That child whispers what they heard to the next one, and on it goes until the last person says the message out loud. The funny part is it almost never matches what the first child actually said. Everybody accidentally changes a word here or there, adds their own little twist, or hears something differently.
That is very much how Karl's SOS gift works. The important part usually gets through, but little pieces can change along the way. So while it is an amazing tool, it is not perfect. We have learned to treat it as guidance, not absolute truth. If Karl receives a warning, we investigate. We prepare. We become very careful. We just do not assume every tiny detail is exactly right because sometimes the message has picked up a wrinkle or two before it reaches us. That is simply the nature of passing information from one person to another.
The next thing that starts making my Karl really special is his power to PIERCE THROUGH OBJECTS and see what is on the other side. One time we were trapped on Clownith, and Karl looked straight through a solid door to see exactly how many guards were waiting for us. Before anyone says it...no, it is not like those comic book heroes with X-ray vision. Not even close. Karl sees as though he were actually standing on the other side. Everything is in full color, full detail, and, most of the time, he can even hear what people are saying. Honestly, if I had that gift, I would probably spend an entire afternoon looking through walls just because I could. Karl? Oh no. He hardly ever uses it.
Of course, I tease him about that. I tell him he could have been undefeated at hide-and-seek as a little boy. Then again, maybe he was. Although I usually let him win anyway. Don't tell him I admitted that. He enjoys victory far too much already. The really amazing part is that his vision is not limited to the room beside us. He can focus hundreds of feet away and still look through objects as clearly as if he were standing right there. That is incredibly useful when danger is waiting where nobody else can see it.
The problem is...my Karl has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I have ever known. He worries about seeing something he was never supposed to see. I keep telling him, "Honey, if it isn't important, just forget it." Then he gives me that patient smile and reminds me that he cannot. Once Karl sees something, it becomes another perfect memory tucked away inside that remarkable mind of his forever. There is no delete button. There is no little trash can he can empty. It stays with him. Every single thing. So because of that, he refuses to use this gift unless there is real danger or no other choice. Personally, I think that is a terrible waste of such a wonderful power, but I also understand why he protects both other people's privacy and his own peace of mind. Besides, when Karl and I are together, he almost never has to use it anyway because between the two of us we usually find another way. Still...if you ask me, I think he could at least use it once in a while to find where I misplaced my favorite book. That would save us both a great deal of time.
A very useful power that Karl was given is the power of UNMASKING. I rather like that name because it sounds dramatic, and believe me, it deserves to. Whenever Karl asks to see what is truly real, no disguise, illusion, position, or spell can stop him from seeing the actual truth. Now before some of you get all excited and think, "Oh, I want that power!" let me warn you about something. Sometimes the truth is wonderful. Sometimes the truth is heartbreaking. And sometimes...well...sometimes you really wish the ugly thing had stayed behind the curtain for just another five minutes.
That gift comes in very handy whenever there is more than one person, or even animals, that all look exactly alike. I do not know about the rest of you, but I can barely tell twins apart until I spend a little time with them. Karl? He takes one look and says, "Nope, that's not the real one." Meanwhile, I am still standing there wondering if everybody secretly changed shirts while I wasn't paying attention.
There was one case we worked that will eventually show up in one of the books. Honestly, after everything Karl and I have been through, I sometimes forget which adventure belongs in which volume. I suppose that is a nice problem to have. Anyway, in this particular case, everyone believed there was only one tiny little person running around causing trouble. Well...my Karl looked once, tilted his head in that reporter way he does whenever something refuses to make sense, and calmly announced there were actually three of them pretending to be one.
Naturally, everyone looked at him like he had finally bumped his head one too many times.Then everything fell apart.Quite literally.
Suddenly those three little troublemakers split apart and took off in three completely different directions. I still laugh when I think about it. There we all were, grown adults chasing different body parts through the area because each little rascal had decided running away separately was a wonderful idea. It looked less like an investigation and more like someone had shaken up a toy box and told us, "Ready...go!" I am fairly certain anyone watching from a distance would have questioned every life decision that brought us there.
That is one of the reasons I admire my Karl so much. He never lets appearances make his decisions for him. He trusts facts. He trusts evidence. He trusts what is actually there instead of what everyone else assumes is there. I think that is one of the greatest lessons any investigator, reporter, or my new sleuths can ever learn. Never let the crowd decide what is true for you. Look, think, ask questions. Then look again. The truth is usually very patient. It does not mind waiting for someone willing to notice it.
Of course, having Karl around also means I can never get away with pretending I did not eat the last cookie. One look and he knows exactly what happened. Honestly, living with all these powers can be terribly inconvenient for a girl who enjoys little surprises now and then. But I would not trade my Karl for all the cookies in every realm. Besides, he usually shares the last one with me anyway...after reminding me he knew I was going to ask before I even opened my mouth.
Now we get to another one of Karl's powers that has come in very handy when we have to...oh, almost got you there! Nope. Not saying that story yet. I saw some of you leaning forward thinking, "Aha! Julie's finally going to spoil one of the big surprises!" Nice try, my little sleuths. Karl would never let me hear the end of it. He already says I have the self-control of a squirrel that just discovered an entire truckload of acorns. So, once again, I shall behave myself. At least for the next few paragraphs.
Anyway, this next power becomes incredibly useful whenever the truth itself is standing on trial. It is called OATH BINDING, and believe me, it is not something I would ever want used on me unless I was telling the absolute truth. All Karl has to do is speak a few simple words, and if someone knowingly tells a lie afterward, that lie becomes painful. Not embarrassing. Not uncomfortable. Painful. It is almost as though the truth itself finally gets tired of being ignored and decides to remind people that honesty actually matters. Now, before anybody gets nervous and starts wondering if Karl walks around making everyone swear promises all day long...he does not. First of all, he would hate doing that. My Karl has never enjoyed forcing anyone into anything. If people tell him the truth because they choose to, that makes him happier than any power ever could. He believes trust should be earned whenever possible. This gift is only for moments when there is simply too much at stake for lies to win. The really interesting part is that it also works with promises. You know how some people say, "Oh, I promise," while already planning to do the exact opposite five minutes later? Well...that is a very poor life choice around my Karl. If someone makes a promise under the binding and then decides they can simply ignore it, surprise! Their own broken promise reminds them in a rather painful way that words actually mean something. Personally, I rather like that idea. Maybe not the painful part. Well...perhaps just a tiny little bit. There have been times when I wished everyone in the world had to keep the promises they made. Imagine how different things would be if every promise to a child, every promise between friends, every wedding vow, every promise made just to get someone to trust you actually had to be honored. I think the world would become a much kinder place almost overnight. Of course, Karl just smiled when I told him that. Then he reminded me that people should keep promises because they are good people, not because they are afraid of consequences. See? That is my Karl. Always looking for the better reason. I still think a little reminder every now and then would not hurt certain people, but apparently that is why he is the wise one. Then again, I am usually the fun one, so I suppose everything balances out.
Now we come to Karl's final power, and I honestly still struggle to explain this one because it is unlike anything else either of us has ever encountered. It is called MIRRORING. The first time I saw it happen, I was not even sure what I was watching. It was not flashy. There were no bright lights. Nothing exploded. Nobody floated into the air. Karl simply allowed another person to see themselves exactly as they truly were. Not the face they showed the world. Not the excuses they told themselves. Not the version they wished everyone believed. Their real self. Their true character. It is almost like holding the world's most honest mirror in front of someone's soul. Now here is the fascinating part. Unless someone is truly evil to their very core, that moment becomes almost impossible to hide from. The walls they have spent years building suddenly begin to crack. Defenses disappear. Pride melts away. Many people simply break down crying because, for the first time in a very long time, they are forced to meet the person they have actually become instead of the person they pretend to be. And then...they talk. Not because Karl threatens them. Not because he tricks them. Not because he frightens them. They simply cannot carry the weight anymore. Out comes the whole messy story they never planned on telling another living soul. Sometimes it is heartbreaking. Sometimes it is beautiful. Sometimes it finally allows healing to begin. I have watched people leave those moments lighter than when they walked in, almost as though they had been carrying a giant backpack full of rocks for years and suddenly realized they did not have to anymore. Now, where in the world was this marvelous gift when I was sixteen? Honestly! There was this boy from the next village who decided the greatest way to get my attention was to steal my canoe so I would have to come looking for it...and, of course, him. Boys. Even jungle boys apparently suffer from mysterious thinking. I remember standing there wondering who in their right mind steals a girl's canoe if they are trying to impress her. Flowers? Nice. Friendly conversation? Even better. Fresh fruit? Excellent choice. Canoe theft? That is your grand romantic plan? Strange dating practices in the jungle, I tell you. If Karl had been around back then, one little use of MIRRORING and that poor boy probably would have admitted everything before lunchtime. Instead, I spent half the day tracking footprints through the jungle while he hid behind a tree thinking he was being terribly clever. He wasn't. I found both him and my canoe. He was much easier to forgive than my poor canoe, though. It had a few new scratches, and I liked that canoe. Then again...if that silly little adventure had never happened, I would not have nearly as funny a story to tease all of you with today. Life has a funny way of turning even the strangest moments into smiles years later.
Before we talk about what Karl and I can do together, I should probably apologize. I told myself this was going to be a nice, short little paper. Well...that idea lasted about three minutes. I did it again. As Karl always says, I have an amazing ability to turn one sentence into an entire chapter. He is probably right. I suppose that is one reason he writes the books while I write these little pamphlets. Besides, Karl very wisely stays far away from editing my papers. I honestly think he would quietly remove half my little side trips and jokes until I finally sounded like a serious grown-up. Well...where would the fun be in that? I rather enjoy wandering down little rabbit trails now and then. Sometimes they are almost as interesting as the road I was supposed to be walking on. Besides, if you have made it this far with me, I think you already know that my brain does not travel in straight lines. It sort of...bounces. Usually happily. Sometimes unexpectedly. But it almost always finds its way back home eventually.
Oh my, there I go proving Karl right again.
Anyway, enough about me getting distracted. It is finally time to talk about the powers Karl and I share together because, if I am being honest, these are my favorite of all. Not because they are the strongest, although some of them are certainly impressive, but because every single one of them reminds me that neither Karl nor I was ever meant to do this alone. Separately, we each have gifts. Together we become something far greater than either of us could ever become by ourselves. There are only a few of these shared abilities, but they have saved our lives more times than I could possibly count. Considering our lives seem to collect adventures the way other people collect refrigerator magnets, that is saying something. So, my sleuths, let us start with the one we use more than any other. If you have read Karl's stories, you have already seen it happen dozens of times without even realizing just how important it truly is.
That brings us to another wonderful aspect of the power of BALANCE, and this is probably why you will notice Karl and me holding hands so often throughout our stories. Some readers have even written to ask if we ever let go of each other. Well...yes. Occasionally. Usually to eat. Sometimes to fight monsters. Other than that, we seem to enjoy being together an awful lot.
You see, Balance is also how we share our energy. If one of us becomes exhausted, the other can quietly help restore what has been lost simply by being close. Holding hands is the easiest way, but when we are lying together at night, resting peacefully beside one another, that sharing becomes even stronger. It is almost as though our bodies and spirits remember they belong together and naturally help one another become whole again.
I cannot begin to tell you how comforting that has been over the years. There have been nights when Karl came home carrying the weight of an entire day on his shoulders. Other nights it was me who had nothing left to give. We never really had to ask. We would simply sit together, hold hands, or curl up beside one another, and little by little the strength would return. Sometimes neither of us even realized it was happening until one of us suddenly smiled and said, "I feel better."
That is one of my favorite things about our bond.
It reminds me that love is not always grand speeches or heroic moments. Sometimes love is simply sitting quietly beside the person who means everything to you and helping carry a little of their burden without either of you saying a single word.
So, if you read through our books and notice that Karl and I spend an awful lot of time holding hands, walking arm in arm, or falling asleep wrapped around one another, now you know there is more happening than simple romance. Oh, do not misunderstand me. We are terribly romantic too. I rather enjoy that part. My Karl gives the nicest hugs in all the realms, and I plan on keeping them all to myself. But there is another reason as well. We are quietly restoring one another, preparing ourselves for whatever impossible adventure decides to interrupt our peaceful evening next.
There have even been times before particularly dangerous missions when we purposely sat together for a while, hand in hand, saying very little at all. To anyone else, it probably looked like two people enjoying a peaceful moment. In reality, we were preparing ourselves for what lay ahead, sharing strength, calming our hearts, and making sure we would both walk into the next challenge as ready as we could possibly be.
I honestly think that may be one of the sweetest gifts we were ever given. Not because it makes us stronger, although it certainly does, but because every single time it reminds us that neither one of us ever has to carry life's weight alone.
Then I have to tell you about one of my absolute favorite powers because, if you ask me, this one is just plain fun. Many of our gifts work hand in hand, but this one is probably the one Karl and I use more than any other. We call it the Bat-Phone. Yes, I know. Very official-sounding, isn't it? Somewhere there are probably ancient scholars rolling over in their graves after hearing what we named a sacred ability. The old scrolls call it THE DIVINE LINK, which is certainly much grander and sounds as though trumpets should be playing every time someone says it. Karl and I looked at each other, shrugged, and said, "Bat-Phone." I suppose that tells you everything you need to know about us.
The Bat-Phone lets Karl and me speak directly to each other with our minds. Not little feelings. Not guesses. Not hoping the other person figures out what we mean. We have full conversations without saying a single word or even looking at one another. If someone were watching us, they would think we were standing there completely silent while, in reality, we were probably discussing three different plans, arguing over which one was safer, and deciding who was going first through the next dangerous doorway. Usually Karl wants to protect me. Usually I remind him I am perfectly capable of protecting myself too. Marriage is funny sometimes.
This gift has saved us more times than I could ever count. There have been moments when making even the tiniest sound would have meant disaster. Other times we were surrounded by people who could not know what we were planning. Instead of whispering, nodding, or trying to pass little signals back and forth, we simply...talk. Quietly. Instantly. It lets us stay completely together in whatever task is before us, even when we are separated by a room or facing different dangers at the exact same moment. Honestly, after living with it for so long, I sometimes forget other couples actually have to speak out loud. Poor things. They have no idea what they are missing.
Of course, before anyone gets any clever ideas, no, it does not mean Karl hears every little thought bouncing around inside my head all day long. Thank goodness! If he did, he would spend half his time wondering why I suddenly started thinking about flowers, rabbits, old books, pie, and whether squirrels have neighborhood meetings...all while we were supposed to be solving a mystery. No, we choose when to use it. Otherwise my poor Karl would never get a moment's peace.
Another shared gift is one I really cannot explain very deeply yet because the reason it is so important belongs later in our story. I promise it is worth the wait. It is called the power of BALANCE, and it does exactly what its name suggests. Karl and I naturally balance each other's feelings and emotions. If one of us becomes overwhelmingly happy, the other may suddenly feel much calmer. If one of us starts sinking under the weight of fear, sadness, or anger, the other is gently pulled toward the opposite side so we do not both fall into the same emotional hole together.
At first, I thought it felt rather strange. Then I realized how wonderfully wise it really is. Imagine two frightened people trying to make an important decision while both are panicking. Or two angry people trying to solve a problem while neither is thinking clearly. That almost never ends well. Balance quietly keeps us from tipping too far in one direction. It gently steadies us so one of us is always able to think clearly enough to help the other find solid ground again.
Now, does that mean Karl and I never laugh together? Oh goodness, no. We laugh until our sides hurt sometimes. We cry together too. We celebrate victories, mourn losses, and enjoy peaceful mornings with coffee and books just like anyone else. Balance does not steal our feelings. It simply refuses to let either one of us become so overwhelmed that we lose sight of who we are or what we are fighting for.
I rather like that.
Actually...I think every marriage could use a little Balance now and then.
Although, if everyone suddenly had a Bat-Phone too, I suspect restaurants would become awfully quiet.
So, my new sleuths, that brings us to the end of the powers Karl and I share together and also the wonderful gifts my Karl has been given. I hope they have helped you understand him just a little better because, while his powers are certainly amazing, they are not the reason I love him. They simply help him do what he was already born wanting to do, and that is help people, uncover the truth, and somehow manage to drag me home safely after another one of our adventures. Most of the time, anyway.
I have never really liked people telling us we are special or unique. Those words always make me want to look over my shoulder to see who they are talking about. The trouble is...they are right. Together or apart, Karl and I have been given lives that are anything but ordinary. I suppose after everything we have been through, I simply have to accept that I am no longer that shy little girl growing up on an island who thought the whole world ended at the shoreline. Sometimes I actually miss that girl. She worried about wonderfully simple things. Then again, she had not met my Karl yet, so perhaps everything happened exactly the way it was supposed to.
Karl has had to accept something too.
He is no longer alone.
For so many years he walked into impossible situations with only a notebook, a camera, and enough stubbornness to frighten common sense. Then one day...he found me.
Or maybe I found him.
Honestly, we still argue about that once in a while.
I usually tell people I rescued Karl. Karl insists he rescued me.
The truth is we both did. That sounds about right.
Now, I should also admit something before my dear husband decides to tell you himself. Yes, I have threatened to leave him forever if he did not take off that stinky hat of his. More than once, actually. He loves that hat. I am fairly convinced if the house caught on fire, Karl would grab me first...and then the hat would be a very close second. I keep telling him there has to be a support group somewhere for people overly attached to their fedoras. He just smiles, tips it at me, and says, "My bride, this hat has been through everything with me." Well...I suppose I cannot argue with that. Besides, I rather like the way he looks wearing it. Please do not tell him I admitted that. His reporter ego is quite healthy enough already.
But seriously. I could never leave my Karl, not in this life, not in any realm, not after everything we have shared together.
We truly are a bonded pair in ways most people could never imagine, and I would not trade that bond for anything in all creation. Every adventure, every mystery, every frightening moment, every laugh, every quiet evening holding each other close, every sunrise, and every victory has only made that bond stronger. We have already decided how our story ends.
Together, always together.
And if all goes according to our plans, all of us will still be gathering every Sunday for dinner, telling stories about the latest impossible thing Karl and I managed to survive while everyone else rolls their eyes and wonders how those two found trouble again.
Knowing us...
We probably did not find it.
It found us.
Well, my new sleuths, thank you for spending a little time with me. I hope these little pamphlets have made you smile now and then, made you think once or twice, and perhaps helped you look at the world a little differently. Until next time, keep asking questions, keep looking beneath the surface, keep being kind, and never stop chasing the truth.
Toodles...for now.
