I am a dealer in Death. It is the family business, really. You would be surprised how sought after a death experience is. You as a mortal might not understand this; it takes an immortal to appreciate what true death feels like.
My race has been around as long as I can remember- and I can remember the woolly mammoth. Not true; I came to your planet with the rest of my clan around the time of the pyramids... Okay, so the mammoths WERE still around, I just never saw them. So my lifespan does go back to the beginning of historical human existence. Human for this world, that is.
We cannot die, none of us can. I won't bore you with how we became immortal, probably disappoint you anyway. Has nothing to do with vampire-ism, zombie-ism, mummies, etc., though we've inspired a lot of myths about those things. Mostly the generic Demons, which is a weird bastardization of our race's original name, by the way... A lot of the ancient Gods, too - yeah, we are the "Ancient Astronauts" that guy wrote books about in your 1970's. No, he was not one of us, just dated one of our bigger blabber mouths.
Like the black cape and cowl look? Yeah, you play the Grim Reaper enough, you wanna dress the stereotype. This cloaking suit lets me walk invisibly past the guards and blur any video monitors while this electronic key lets me in to your cell here to set you up for tomorrow morning's show. Oh, and, no, I do not call this gizmo my "electronic screwdriver". Though I guess comparing me to a Time Lord is closer to the truth than a vampire.
So, anyway, we cannot die, do not ever want to. But time to time we wonder what that would be like. And that is where Death and Sons comes in. Not the actual firm name, by the way. Our family developed the technology eons and worlds ago that could monitor and record the dying moments of other, mortal, living beings. Store the physical sensations, the last thoughts, the sea of emotions that happen at the point of death and play those last moments back as a virtual reality for our clients.
I can record these death sensations remotely, kind of like setting up those Nat Geo nature cameras in the jungle. Got these devices set up all around the world, never know when sickness or accident or a war will occur so I have to set my traps and see what develops. But nothing is like capturing a death directly, through monitors embedded in a dying human being. That's what those small discs are that I was attaching to your temples when you woke up. Don't bother trying to take them off when I leave and the paralysis wears off. Those discs have already oozed under your skin; by the time you wake up again in the morning they'll be nestled against your skull and your scalp will have healed over flawlessly.
When you can survive almost any fatal event- disease, violence, fire, flood, smog- it makes you wonder how the other half lives; or dies. Hell, we can be blown to bits and some small left-over scab will manage to totally regenerate. The only one of my race ever to die on this planet that I know of was a tourist who was at the wrong Hiroshima at the wrong time...
Anyway, there are some times when we can find a subject that is certain to die and manage to implant a set of these recorders to get the purest capture of the moment of death. Like the terminally ill or fatally injured; those are sad, tragic experiences that can reaffirm your desire to live. And remind us immortals that you who can die need to be respected and avoid any actions on our parts to cause a human's death. We're not the ghouls you want to believe we are.
Executions, however, are the most sought-after deaths and a rare guilty pleasure. Feeling the life drain out of a true piece of scum that deserves to die is a thrill and a reassurance that there is justice in the world! Hence my visit tonight to your cell. Once I am done here and put you back under, you'll forget most of what happened here tonight... Well, most of it. But do not be surprised if you wake up tomorrow and suddenly want to embrace Jesus and beg forgiveness. After all, you'd swear Death himself was standing in your cell as you slept. Seen it happen more than once after one of my jobs.
Sick to say this, but as an entrepreneur I feel lucky you came along. Wars are so commonplace on this rock these days as well as plague that the market's been glutted with recordings of those deaths. And lucky enough you were convicted in one of the few states to still use the chair!
So, I would wish you luck tomorrow, but, well... And in case you're thinking it is unfair that I am recording your execution as a pay-per-view for undead aliens, consider this: I was unfortunate enough to have a recorder set up in that park where you grabbed the girl. Got the whole, sickening, experience from rape to stabbing to river dump. Do NOT talk to me about unfair.
What is fair, and keep this at the back of your mind tomorrow as you get strapped down for your grilling, is that as painful and terrifying as the death of the girl was, I can guarantee from re-lived experience that it will be NOTHING compared to the agony you will feel as your body is fried molecule by molecule. Time slows down when that's happening; and you'll feel every long, long second of it. THAT is what I would call fair. So, night-night, butt-wipe!
End