I was finally done with primary school and I was now a secondary school student, It was an all girls boarding school, where certain acts or interests were immediately awarded with either suspension or expulsion. In Jss2 we had new students enroll into the school, there was this girl who if you didn't look properly she looked just like a young boy,at this point I already started suspecting my interests weren't the 'norm' but at this point I thought I was only interested on her due to the fact that she looked like a boy, still I befriended the girl, we were close, became best friends,I would even get jealous whenever she hung out with other girls and vice versa, we were in different arms but we were almost never seen without the other, with her help I illegally moved into her room, where we acted like a married couple, always giving each other a peck on the cheek before going for our respective morning duties, and although nothing happened between us, I remember imagining us taking a bath together and she tells me "she's a boy disguised as a girl" and maybe that was the reason for my infatuation but it wasn't that, by the end of Jss3 I was moved to a day school, and once again I never saw her again.

In this day school I was trying to come to terms with a lot of things like how our emotions and interests fluctuate so much and I heard my brother tell my mum one day that Facebook uses less data than Google, and I stored this piece of information in my head. Now at this point in my life I didn't have a phone neither did my younger brother, hence one fateful day, I got a hold of my mum's phone and I thought it would be the best opportunity to try and figure out what I really like, so I took the phone opened the Facebook app, want to the search page and typed in "lesbian porn". Other than the fact that the search didn't even bring up what I wanted, because at the time barely 6 people had come out on Facebook and they weren't posting illicit content, I couldn't even find an answer and I even changed it to "lesbian pornography". After the not so fruitful search I somehow couldn't delete the search prompts, i tried and tried to delete them but I didn't know how to, so I switched tactics and started praying that my mum wouldn't open her Facebook search page.

But alas, the next morning just before school, she called to ask what those search prompts were, and I dear reader due to a lack of creativity told her that I was searching for hospitals in Portugal, till today I don't know how I thought of that or how the thought even crossed my mind but it was immediately erased by a sound slap to the face. My mum after that started watching me more closely took me to churches for deliverance, spoke to seers and a prophetess to know if I really have this "condition".