Breathing on the side of the road is no fun. Yes, you can look at the people walking by. Listen to what they are saying. But, only if you could listen to what they were thinking.
Breathing together with someone is fun, even on the side of the road. You can make fun of the people walking by. Talk about what they are saying. Talk about what they might be thinking.
But sometimes, on some very sad times, you can't breathe together with anyone. Sometimes, it's because there is no one around you. Sometimes, it's because there is no one with you. Anymore. In those times breathing at the middle of the road seems fun. Exhilarating.
Yet sometimes, you find yourself in your dark room, contemplating about being on the middle of the road, with the one who matters the most to you, smiling, while being blinded by the lights, the light in the distance, coming closer to you with every passing second, ready to take your pain away at the same speed.
The pain that has been in your heart.
But you are not strong.
Not strong enough to throw the pain away. Not even strong enough to accept that your heart is in pain.
But, every single day these thoughts come to an inconclusive end with the sound of your alarm, beeping you into reality. It's time to get ready for the day. You change your clothes, but remain the same man.
You had dreams. What happened? You used to be happy. What happened? You used to be yourself. What happened?
You come back home with the same thoughts. You are on the road. On the middle of the road.
But you are too tired to stop. You just want to go home and rest on your bed. Today had been too tiring. You are looking forward to tomorrow. To go through the same thoughts again.
Because you are strong enough to live and not weak at all to end it.
