Alice springs,Australia,2011

I feel strange. This life moves by prediction of what would happen next. It should not be like this. The events must release dopamine if not adrenaline. Don’t you think its way to systematic? I hate those plans and their perfection. Shouldn’t you decide things on the go and savor it. Instead of mourning over that the event did not go by the planned way. There is not a single event on earth that has happened exactly as planned. It’s definitely prone to changes. Don’t you ever wonder why? I sincerely hope you get the answer soon.

I was waiting in the railway station, glancing my watch from time to time. I was given no choices than to leave on my own. I was kind of relieved that I won’t regret having made this decision as this i only choice left. There were 4 trains till midnight. I had a money that could last for month, given I don’t spend it on any luxuries. I can’t trust anyone I knew as they might report me to old life. Again, I was pleased, that I have no other go, than to live a new life in a new place. I saw the LED station board, it had 4 trains. I saw someone behind me ushering in phone.

“I am alright, can you stop worrying, I am done convincing, give me some peace, respect my decision, will contact you if anything goes wrong, good bye”

That was some young fellow, he got the ticket for the Ghan train.  I googled for more details. It is the largest distance travelling train in Australia about 3000km. I had no idea where to go yet I was sure this train would give me enough time to briefly contemplate my next decision. I got the same ticket. This is the first choice I have made in my new life.

There was a crowd behind me. When I was swiftly taking out the money, I spilled out my allergy pills into bag.

I boarded the train; it was very humid inside. deciding to stand by the door, I got down my berth. As I was walking by, I heard someone gasping. The train blew its horn.  I made my ears sharper. I could hear the wheels rolling and again a gasping sound with a mild voice

 “Here here”. I turned to the compartment.

It was my ticket partner in a worse state. I rushed if I could do something. He pointed the bag. I brought the bag near him; with struggles we found the breather. I was quick enough to powder the tablet. He almost fainted. while he was regaining, I was lost in my thoughts. If it was not for him, I would have boarded different train. Who would have saved him? he was there sitting smiling in gratitude. This time I watched him closely.

He does not look too smart, but had an attitude that would be sought after. His chin was like my idol Aaron deng, I thought he was a brother of him or something like that. This temporary illness could not steal his charm. Not by looks but there was something amusing about him, that I could see in his eyes. I was lost in my world until he gave a slight giggle.

“What you got some panic attack or something?” I realized I was staring and got up to leave.

I expected a thank you. He ushered “Are you travelling alone?”. I am a fool to think that people would not notice me.

 “Not your concern anyway.” I was pretty rude yet it did not affect him at all.

“My friend, it’s not a cliché, I was just asking, you are my life saver, I owe you”. I was processing. Definitely I can’t trust the stranger, yet I have no plans after getting off the train.

“So do me a favor?” I asked. His carriage was empty. He moved his luggage and signaled me to sit in a polite manner.

I continued “I want to know about cities in Australia where I can have job and a peaceful life”. The answer came fast than I have imagined.

“The Gold Coast can be an extremely affordable city to live in. Accommodation rates are generally lower than in capital cities, with rooms in a share house starting from as low as $135 per week in great areas such as Southport and Surfers Paradise.”

“You seem to stick to that; Does it matter a lot to you”

“I thought you need more about the city”

I cursed myself “Continue”.

His face was inexpressive, I felt like I am hearing a radio. It didn’t feel like I am conversing with a human.

“It wasn't long ago the best meals on the Gold Coast came served with batter and chips. Now some of the country's best young chefs are setting up shop, offering more innovative high-end dining options than either Noosa or Byron Bay. Buses operate up and down the Gold Coast Highway, which runs parallel to the coast – but few locals use them.

 There's two Gold Coasts

Comparing the southern Gold Coast to the northern Gold Coast is like comparing two entirely different destinations – don't do it. There's a cultural divide which kicks in”

He was perfectly addressing what I want to know about. Still, I did not let out my grateful expression.

“Is there anything else specifically you want to know?”

“What about climate and its specializations?”

“The city is a major tourist destination with a sunny, subtropical climate and has become widely known for its world-class surfing beaches, high-rise dominated skyline, theme parks, nightlife, and rainforest hinterland.” there was a pause.

There was a cool breeze, train was going through a bridge.

“Is the city safe?” looks like he sensed my anxiety.

“Unless, you step into water I would say you can be safe. The City of Gold Coast Council warned residents to be aware of stingrays, jellyfish, catfish, stonefish and sharks that frequent local lakes and canals.

When it comes to land, I think you are more dangerous for other people”

He was grinning. I was shockingly annoyed

“I think it would be helpful if I push you into the lake and check the facts for me. After all I am your life saver”. I said with a cunning expression.

“Looks like a murderer is on loose” he said scrutinizing me. I got up.

“Thank you for enlightening”.

Looked like he realized he asked the wrong question.

“Anytime! For life saver”.

The voice was already distant as I was walking towards the carriage.

Morning 5.30am

It was that time I noticed my carriage colleagues. There was an old couple.  I found them lovely, instantly. Grandma was sleepy grandpa was giving her tablets and water. She was very slow but he was patiently standing beside despite the train moving violently. After that he went to sleep. Both were asleep. I checked my phone. It was 5. 33am.I had thrown the sim off after I left the apartment and I brought a new sim at the station. I freshened up and we had waiter from dinner car. Not many people were awake. I ordered batter and chips.

It’s not new for me to take sudden impulse decisions. But I wondered why I ordered this. Then I remembered events from yesterday night.

I saw a lady sitting at the corner of the dinner car. Something about her was familiar. Her hair was very short like a gentle man. She had a striking resemblance of a well-wisher in my old life. I came back to reality, when she smiled up at me. I made my way towards her.

“Please take your seat” in a Russian accent.

“So where are you from”. I gazed at her. She looks trustable. But I have met her only now.

“Never mind, tell me how to call you?”

I replied.

“Kylie, your eyes speak before you utter anything” she smiled. I watched her she seemed very peaceful but something was disturbing her.

“You can call me Isabella” she said

Waiter came by “Miss, your order is on the way” he turned to the old women. she ordered Pea and ham soup.

We were looking by the window. until I broke the silence. “Shall we talk, if you are willing too”

It looked like I was way too polite. “Anything you want life, love, people, places, war.”

Our dishes arrived. I was hungry. It was afternoon I ate something and had a coffee, while waiting for train, to be precise, while I didn’t know, what train to board in.

She asked me” what did you eat last?”

I mention about the coffee that I had in Starbucks. the name brought smile.

“Do you want to know the story behind it?”. I badly wanted to break the ice between us.

“Please go ahead” I beamed.

“You know them as a successful organization with multiple outlets in every country, quite true.

They did really well in adding new variations, attracting by limited time offers, aesthetically pleasing atmosphere what else a shop needs, but they failed in Australia.

This place has its own culture, we are highly specialized in coffees and the sugar laden cold coffees did suit the place. They are shutting down their outlets at the pace they have opened them.”

They stay where their sugar coffees are sought after, we stay by following our tradition”

“They can’t survive in a place that don’t suit them”

“Yes dear, so it’s better not to force on places that is not meant for them.In an extreme, I would say, if they are not valued here, they lose their dignity everywhere”

I traced back to my old life. what went wrong there. I was valued too much that I lost my freedom. I was constantly looked upon for variations. If I did not meet up with the brainstorming idea, I met up with pressure until I have one.

I asked her what does she do for living.

“I am a writer. it’s quite a long time but it gave me enough money to live a contended life”

“what do you write?”

“Fables that instil good values” she said with pride.

“I also write for advertisements”

I almost gulped my food without chewing. Does she recognise me and want me to admit myself?  I thought of leaving the place quickly after the meal.

I offered my thanksgiving for her kind companion.

“Child, feel free to come to my carriage, I would appreciate someone to hear my tales”

Rushing away I saw asthma boy moving to dinner car. He greeted me. I hurriedly smiled and went to my compartment.

I sat there. The couple staring at my bewildered face. Why does just a glimpse of past make me uncomfortable? I decided not to think more about it.

I looked around. There were 5 compartments in our carriage. The one that’s near to the door was my ticket partners. The second one was a couple and their cute two little children a boy and his young sister. Followed by mine, where the old couple is also present. Next to that we have a gang of youngsters travelling to participate in some events, I guess. The last one was Isabella’s.

There was some yelling happening in nearby compartment. There were 5 people and two of them fighting at high pitch.one guy was coming out of the college as he uttered these words.

“I was doing all the work by myself but you guys had all fun. Now you reason out me for the small mistake I made.”

“Ziro, you definitely did more than us, but it’s the part you done have went wrong and the whole team is suffering”

“you rejoiced when I did extra work, why you didn’t stop me then”. There was a silence. He slammed the seat and went out.

It is this part, the hardest of life. I am an adult who never think that going to youth would bring me happiness. It’s true I did not have responsibility by then but I was bearing lot fake truths in our mind. Not only me, I could see most youngsters in that state. They get too much attached to career or friends or relationship and want things work out in the way exactly how they have calculated. Thats not going to happen. They consider things so seriously. I feel sorry for them. They can be happy only when they stop predicting and accept things as they are. I wish I had grown up earlier and have released myself from that mental cage. Not that age matters, I could still see people in 40s being youngsters in mind. Everyone grows at a point. Noone other than themselves will be aware of it.

That young guy came again took his laptop and went out again. These screens have largely affected and altered the life of these kids.

I checked time. Its 11.24am.it was hot. I was wondering how I am going to survive this noon.

I was wearing cotton linen white shirt and a pink skirt. I purchased clothes before coming to station.as I had only 10 minutes to leave, but I did take something more important apart from my mobile and money.

The old man in my compartment was searching something in his luggage and gave the bottle to his beloved wife. She smiled at him. That looked like mint lemonade. Perfect for summer. Its rude to look what others eat. I turned towards window to make them comfortable. The old man handed me a bottle. “Chill yourself child”

I put a kind smile on my face and politely denied. He kept it near me and sat opposite.

“My daughter loves this so much, its prepared freshly from our farms.do drink and tell us how is it is?”

That’s it, I accepted. I opened the lid, sipped and indulged. It was like what you see in advertisements I felt as if splashed with ice. It soothed my nerves. The lime was very fresh and the mint smell filled the compartment. It was perfect. I felt happy instantly.

Old woman was looking at me. I opened up.

“I like lemonade. It’s this time of year that I like to grab my laptop, head for a cafe with some outdoor space and order up a fresh lemonade or two. There’s just nothing like it!

Every time I go to Le Pain Quotidien I order a mint lemonade. It’s the best, most tart and refreshing lemonade I have ever had and I can’t get enough of it.

But at around $4 for a medium sized glass with a TON of ice in it, it’s just not something I feel like buying every day. It’s just lemonade, right?!”

Gran pa said “Sure, fresh lemon juice, a little sugar, water and fresh mint is an absolutely magical combination. But, dang…

When you buy a drink at a sit-down spot, it’s not just the beverage you’re paying for. It’s the atmosphere, the table-space and the free Wi-Fi that all get factored into the final price.”

“I am impressed by your interpretation”. For the first time I saw his smile, with wrinkles crushing around his eyes.

 “Of course, you like it dear, your eyes widened like you saw a shark in ocean”

I laughed.

“yes grandma, it’s delicious”

“I can share the formula if you want”

“sure!!”

“Lemonade is good for your health honey but that depends on a few factors.”

Lemons are a fantastic source of vitamin C. Lemon pulp is also a great source of pectin, which might help you feel full longer. Over a cup of sugar is used in 95% of the lemonade I came across. That’s almost as much sugar as you’ll find in a can of Coke (and most other soft drinks). Geeeez…”

I was swallowed by her enthusiasm.

At the end of recipe, I told I will definitely try this at home.

At the same time, I was wondering what will be my home.

Grandpa said “and for the atmosphere you are always welcome to our farm”

I imagined a lush green yawn with this old couple spending quality time together. I assured them I would visit once I am settled in the town.

I asked their names-Rebecca and Thomas.

Thomas told “The recipe of lemonade is equally important to the ingredients you use and the love with which you pour into jug. It makes a lemonade a bit extra sweet.”

“Are these prepared from your farm, grandpa?”

“Yes, we prepared it just before we travelled to our daughter’s house, As I said she loves them the most, so we prepared enough for her and her kids to last this summer.”

“Your farm is in gold coast”

“Yes, my child, this place has one of the finest soils for farming”.

This coincidence though, I thought.

“Excuse me”, Thomas went out of compartment.

Rebecca looked tired, I asked her if she would like to sleep. “she politely accepted my offer. I helped her laydown. Closed the curtains. She took my hand.

“You remind me of myself when I was young. Remember this sometimes wrong trains take us to the right place”

I once thought, why do I have a feeling that everyone I speak know that, I ran away from my past life. she slept within a minute. I turned off the lights and came out.

It was my ticket partner, talking in phone.

“I have asked for access in all documents stating my reasons”, a pause.

“Yes sir, I am Ryan” a small pause

“Thank you, sir, make sure things are clear in my way”.

I wasn’t intentionally hearing; I was trying to open the door that was stuck. “Life saver, Mind for a small talk”

I contemplated. I wanted to talk but something did not feel right. “No, I am going to get some air, see you later”

Still the handle was fastened. I wondered it was bolted from outside. Ryan came near me and was knocking the door. Thomas opened it.

 “Sorry my dear, I am used to bolt door out of conscious”

“Forgive me my children” he went inside.

 Now the wind was blowing hot air inside the carriage. I went out, splashed the water in my face neck hands. I felt cool instantly. My white cotton top got wet but with this wind it would dry up in no time. I checked the time.it was 12.35pm.

I took my phone and logged out from all my social media accounts. There were at least 100 messages from my secretary. I told her to take any decision on behalf me. I wonder if they filed any complaints about me went missing. Whatever happens there, has no concern over me here. At any cost, I must avoid police and legal checking’s until I get a proper job here.

I sort of like the journey. Thomas and Rebecca have been kind enough. I am intrigued by the Isabella and Ryan though he seems aloof, he is seemingly good.

Ryan came out with binoculars in hand. He moved to the other door, sat down and was watching through binoculars. Whatsoever I try not to notice but this man is definitely different and demanded my attention.

Finally, my curiosity won, “what can you see through it?”

“We are actually travelling near a sanctuary and national park”

He must have checked in map.

“So, you expect to see? kangaroos?”

“Ha, people can’t have kangaroos near tracks, you must think before you speak. Its Tasmanian devil”

Name sounds frightening “what if it gets in train, shall I close the doors”

“They don’t harm you little girl, Tasmanian Devils are aggressive if they feel threatened or are competing for food. They bare teeth, lunge, and emit loud, blood-curdling shrieks in the dark hours that made early settlers imagine demons had surrounded them in the wilderness.”

The train was slowing down for crossing.

“Ah, I spotted it, wanna see it?” he called me with a childlike expression in face.

I was already attracted by that gadget so without hesitation accepted his offer. He handed me the binoculars. It looked like something wildlife survivors would have damn heavy. Though he was bearing some weight with one hand. I looked through. I could spot some monkey like creatures moving from tree to tree.

“Can you see it?”

“Yeah, it looks like they are laughing’

“They are Quokkas are often called “the happiest animal on Earth” because of their big grins and friendly natures. However, it's important to remember that they're still wild animals. They can bite, and they can get aggressive when fighting over mates or when they feel threatened.”

I shuddered and smiled.

“You smell like mint” Ryan said. I put on a grim expression as I was looking through. We passed the quokkas.

He said “Tasmanian devil can sound bad but it’s better than quokkas”. I was wondering if he is mentioning himself as Tasmanian.

“Just because I don’t know animals, I won’t trust whatever you say about them.”

For the first time I was able shock Ryan. “Then check on google, I can bet on it”

I knew I can’t bet. Because I knew he is right. But still enjoying this amusing person. I bet that he can ask a question and I will answer the truth. He said he will also go by the same bet.

Finally, we both won as he stated a small fact wrong. I was hungry so I bid byes ate alone and returned to my compartment.

I decided to have some time alone, I heard songs and read books. Time passed by. Thomas and Rebecca were sleeping.

A young child came by. she asked whether I could go to the doors. I said that’s too dangerous. She told my brother had jumped from the door why not me.

I threw my book in aghast and rushed to the door. Her parents and a little boy were standing. The girl who came behind me. “Thank you, sister, for being kind to open the door for me”. The look on my face was so serious that the little boy went and took hold the hands of his mother.

Without knowing how to react I came to my place; well, I didn’t know kids are so cunning. She could not reach the door and if she had asked normally, we would have hesitated to open the door. “Damn!”. I will teach her a good lesson.

Evening 5.47pm.

I got up to have some coffee. Without caffeine my half of the brain seemed non functionable. I ordered one. They were cleaning the dining car. I decided to go back and asked the waiter to bring it to my place.

Isabella called me to her place. I introspected. In the morning, I was afraid she has identified me but looks of her are harmless. Given the fact even though she says who I am no one would believe her. She talks so well.so I decided to have quality time on my journey.

I sat down just in time waiter came by, I called him to notify I am in this compartment.

The waiter handed me and it was unbearably hot and I spilled some. The old lady rushed with her hankie and wiped the stain. I was surprised. The hankie looked expensive initialled E. she was wiping and I could not stand that.

“Miss, you need not do that, hand me a tissue”

“Are you alright, did it burn your skin”

I was pleased “I am superfine”. She sat back slowly. I could witness knee pain troubling her. I was wondering how swiftly she came to my aid.

Waiter returned now, after the coffee spilled, apologized and handed me tissues.

There was a brief silence. I watched the old women. She wore a kimono of violet and pink in velvet. Too hot for this summer. These kind of clothes only rich don’t mind wearing in summer as they are always in a refrigerated place in my observation. She was comfortable and looking out through the windows.

The small boy came in. He glanced me and then called Cinera.

She was hiding behind the hand bar and she nodded her head. He gave a stern look with his puppy face and she came in with heads drooping. Both were standing. The boy looked at me.

“I am sorry on behalf of my sister”

I expressed tenderness “It’s ok kiddo”. I was actually over whelmed by his maturity. I asked his name. He said that his parents have advised not to tell names to strangers.

“Roshan” his little sister shouted. He gave her a look. I was laughing now. I told her “Follow your brothers’ advice. He loves you so much”

She gave a naughty expression in her face. I searched my pocket gave them two chocolates. Roshan was quick enough to neglect that politely. I reasoned that their parents would have advised on getting food from strangers. Cinera was seeing the chocolate longingly I felt poor for the kid.

I remembered that I had a keychain sort of some doll, I went up my compartment and gave it to her. She happily accepted. Though Roshan remained somewhat aloof. I told that it was perfectly fine that you are on guard for yourself and your sister and I admire you.

He smiled for the first time and we bid all formal good byes.

In the whole scenario, I forgot the old lady, Now she was sobbing terribly. I was shocked. I didn’t know what to do. I handed her the tissues I had.

She asked me to take a small iPod that was present in her luggage placed under seat. I took it out. She played a song sung by some little boy or that’s what it sounded like.

Song:

The setting sun hides its light in the night. The night sky can be bright and dark. If u ask it, About the darkness before dawn. It will tell you that’s just a part of tomorrow.?!

She wiped her tears and looked a little better. I asked her.

“A ginger tea or a cup of milk?” she denied.

“I shall go back to my compartment, feel free and call me when you are fine”

She was out of words. Held my hand and gestured me towards the seat. I sat down uncomfortably. To be honest it was the longest silence in my life.

“This small boy reminded me of my brother, he was my everything. He was my treasure; do you want to know what made me cry?”

Desperately yes, I thought. I could not make a head or tail out of it. she gave a faint smile

“Here we go”.

My parents died at young age. We were wealthy enough but very small children. My brother was 15 and I was 8 so our solicitor found a distant aunt and uncle to live with. They were kind enough. Only after our solicitor left, we saw their true faces. They had two children. Aunt Claire prohibited us to go to school. My brother pleaded that at least they could send me to school. They accepted under one condition that my brother should work as a bartender in their bar. He was working all day. I went to school came back and did chores for aunt Claire’s other two children.it was a hell but still I treasure those days with my brother. We managed to have good time somehow. We had a lake nearby. He would take me there for fishing and tell me stories. I never missed mom and dad when I was with him

One fine day the weather was rainy, a salubrious weather. I came down the house to check on my brother. He was happy told me we could play as rain has come no customers will come.

We decided to play our favourite game.in this game the participants should run far as they can and never turn back. If they turn back and found the participant behind him. He loses. We started the game. I ran as fast as I can. In the main road, I was pushed down by someone, I heard a thump sound behind me and by sound it was a horse. I ran again so that I don’t lose the game. Later I got tired. I started to search my brother. I was in a market and people were crowded at a place. I went there to peep in and i saw my brother lying. I asked an old fellow what happened. He told in order to save a girl he pushed himself to a horse and people don’t know whose child he is. My head was spinning. I went and cried near him. He was dead. Poor old lady continued with a shrill in her voice. I was done with two tissues by now.

“This song I heard is one we recorded in station those days in tape, I was protecting it and after the modern technologies arrived, I copied it to iPod and take wherever I go, this reminds me of the good old times and gives me hope” she held the iPod close to her heart.

I had no words to soothe her. Her pain was terrible when compared to what I have went through. I reflected that HOW SHE OVERCAME THE GUILT FEEL over the possibilities of avoiding her brother’s death. Like if she hadn’t called her brother for game or at least she could have turned back when she heard the horse falling down. She answered like she read my mind.

“I know these things I said, would hit you differently, but things cannot be changed, especially your past, learn to accept that few things are out of control. If I had only done like this in past, it would be better, you might think but remember you would have no idea on future. Follow your inner heart that’s all we can do”

“Everyone’s problems are unique, pain that each person experiences cannot be compared to others. Respect your problems allow yourself to worry and overcome it. Just because it’s not the saddest problem on earth, doesn’t mean you have to be grateful to whatever happens to you”

This past of her has affected me terribly. It was time for dinner. Thomas asked if I would like to join them. I said that I am not hungry. As he persisted, I asked him to get a glass of milk when he returns.

I was now alone. I allowed my mind to wander. I let myself cry. Time passed by. I felt better and even stronger I would say. I heard sounds of Cerene crying and went to take a look. Her parents want her to sleep then go for their dinner. She was resisting that she should get down. After calling by name, I addressed their parents she thanked me for the gift.

Her parents were shocked at a sudden stranger being friends with their child. I explained the situation. The young couple laughed and told that they knew Cerene did some mischief to me but never guessed it was this bad. This cheerful couple were Adolf-Zara.

After formal introduction, Adolf said that Roshan was always way to matured for his age. But he was exactly a brother that Cerene needs.

I said that I would be happy to take care of Cerene until they have dinner. After lot of persuading from my side. They left for dinner.

I read stories to Cerene; All I could see was her non sleepy big egg like eyes. And her questions were really unanswerable, I was getting tired, I wondered how her family managed to put up with her. The train was stationed. It was 8.56pm. Cerene asked that if I could take her for a small walk. She promised that she won’t utter a word to her parents to save me. I laughed “Of course Cerene, you shouldn’t lie to your parents, if not you I would say to them”

“Then do you accept, to take me for a walk” she said with her big bright eyes shining.

It seemed impossible to turndown this cute little pie’s request. while I was thinking, Cerene in a misery tone

 “Why is everyone in this world is strict like my big brother?” She let out a cute expression like sobbing.

“All right!” I said, I was done. I saw in the LED station chart that the train would leave by 10.15pm. That’s a lot of time for a small walk

We got down. She was holding my hand tightly. It was soft small hands. I held it without pressurising it.

Beauty of the child

We walked. It looked like; the sun has broken itself to million magic pieces. I was there watching her eyes, shining with reflection of sky. Having million reasons not to look at the starry night, I watched the moon smiling...

she soon began to rub her eyes and was dragging her feet while walking. I took her in my arm. Young lady fell asleep within seconds. I rushed to the compartment, lay her down. Made sure she is covered with blanket on all corners.

Zara returned. “I rushed first because I thought she might annoy you”.

I told she behaved good and I took her for walk to get some air and she slept. Zara was extremely happy. I could see the relief of mother. She can have peaceful night Afterall. And hope I can have some peace too.

MORNING 5.00AM

Next morning, I woke up, I did not feel the laziness in past life, where I was sticking to bed unwilling to get up. I sprang up to freshen. I thought of wearing some makeup. One day before, I was a stranger but not now, things are changing. I am getting friends and some might continue for life long. My skin is finally breathing and I did not want to ruin up now. I wore my comfy green tees and pink pants. I remembered Ryan’s compliment; you smell like mint. I sprayed a jasmine perfume that Thomas gifted when I gave him a pair of shoes that I have bought for myself in case I need to walk long distance. Thomas told he prepared the perfume by himself, with organic jasmines from his farm. I could visualize the farm full of jasmine before my eyes. I came out near the door with laptop. It was Ryan. I did not expect anyone this early in morning it was just 5 min passed 5.

I opened my mouth to greet him. he asked “May I know your good name”

“Kylie”

“Kylie, can you help me with some document searching?”

I sat beside him and nodded my head. He handed his laptop and asked me to find any name called Emma foster. I assumed that he was doing that job and he passed it to me. Then is he going to relax now? I pondered. but never mind I have decided to help, then let me do that full heartedly.

I went through the documents it had 1,00,000 names. It was hardcopy scanned document, so we cannot search by words. After 10 minutes. I looked Ryan. He was concentrating the document in his phone.

 I told “I can look in phone. Take your laptop”. He neglected and was seriously looking at his phone. I once thought, he didn’t hear me. When I was about to repeat, what I have just said.

He replied “Beautiful eyes cannot be spoiled”. My heart warmed but I  was looking at laptop as I never heard anything he said.

We both searched vigorously and completed almost 50,000 documents approximately.

My eyes were getting sore, he got the laptop from me and asked me to rest.

I accepted as I could no longer concentrate yet I want to help him very much.

I said that I want to ask the question that we bet on yesterday.

“’Go ahead” he said shook his head

“Where are you from, why are you travelling?”

He asked “Do you want to know why I asked you to search this name”

“I am quite brilliant but I don’t know about everything that’s happening”

“Ah, I see, let me give you some insight about myself” he could answer the question in a sentence but thank God he didn’t.

It was my 23rd birthday. After the party was over at night my father came by me and shared the truth about me. We were a very good family. My father was in navy and my mom a home maker. I had 3 sisters two brothers.it was a family that you would never be bored of.

“I would!!?” I asked in a different tone.

“Oh man, why do take everything I say as a cliché, I would better be careful” I chuckled.

Back to narration.

On my birthday, my father said that I wasn’t his child by birth. He was least concerned about it and was never willing to share, but it was my mom told him that I had the right to know about myself. what had happened was… (it was a flashback inside the flashback)

September 11 1991, I was found in the ship my father allotted to renovate. He told that after all passengers left by, I was sitting on a trunk looking at the moon. When he asked me, I said I was hungry and he took me home served me meal. For next few days, he was searching details about me. All he knew was…

“Was??” I urged

“I travelled with a lady and whose whereabout was unknown by then “

“And now?”

“Well, by investigation of trunk I had, I know I need to find Emma foster”

“A letter or something “I asked

“Sort of, I actually found that long ago but my mother was afraid to send me. She thought she would lose me.”

I related it with the phone conversation he had while getting the ticket.

“You can take a look at trunk if you want, it’s besides the left side of my luggage in upper berth”

I got up.

I heard Thomas voice “Oh dear, I was searching you everywhere”

“Let’s eat breakfast together, Rebecca has asked about your where abouts million times and you are here with this young man”

Ryan seemed to be proud at this notice. There was a silence.

“Grandpa, this is Ryan, my friend, let go eat breakfast” Poor Rebecca she is diabetic patient. I can’t make her starve I thought.

Thomas said “Let’s call your friend too, join us Ryan”. Ryan was happy at the invitation and at once joined with us.

While we were moving to the dinner car. He whispered behind my ears. “How do you know my name?”. I myself wasn’t clear how, then it strike through, the telephonic conversation. I didn’t know how to manage. I was just blinking. And we sat for breakfast. It was Lamingtons and iced VoVo.

Iced VoVo has been my favourite in Australia. The wheat-flour biscuit with a strip of pink fondant on either side of raspberry jam and sprinkled with coconut is a sweet, soft and crunchy mouthful. 

Rebacca and Thomas on one side, we sat opposite.

Ryan replied “Its fine, I will forgive you”. I was like what…

Rebacca saved Ryan, she was asking where he was from and spoke about his home town. Rebacca had some distant relative from the same place. They talked about that. Though it was sort of boring, as I couldn’t make head or tail out of it. I was sort of liking Ryan’s company. The way he speaks to elders not too much respect or not showing that he is a young boy. He made them comfortable talking to their wavelength. He spoke about organic farming and Thomas was filling with many ideas. We were sitting there for long time after breakfast. At one point, I was even jealous of Ryan, of the attention he got from Thomas and Rebecca, but then I was reminded of my past life, where I was constantly running away from attention and instantly felt comfortable.

After breakfast I decided to check on Isabella. Poor lady, I have developed a soft corner for her.

I went to her compartment; she was hearing the song from her iPod. Those lines, especially after hearing her flash back gave me goosebumps. I thought she needed her own space and was moving when accidently I stepped on the luggage which almost tripped me off.

Ryan who came behind me panicked for a moment. Asked if I am Oki, I nodded. The miss noticed me and asked me to take a seat. She was still hearing the song. I watched her. Her hair though short had a perfect shine. She must have been a beauty when she was young. I assumed.

After finished her song, she turned to me. I complimented her hair.

Curiously, I asked if she cut her hair for sales. She laughed and said she would never do that for money. Then with a sadness in her face. She told me.

After my brother died, I was psychologically hurt to a larger extent, I once wanted to end my time. But I know that he would never have liked that. I took my scissors went before mirror and cut my hair as short as I can like boy’s summer cut. I smiled at mirror. He smiled back at me.

At once horror filled my brain, I thought its some ghost or something. I realized that they were twins.

“Twins?”

“Yes, after that I never liked to grow my hair long and I never see mirror unless I wanted to see him”

I was taken aback by her love.

I want this sad phase to end. I asked her to speak about her writings. Her eyes widened and she told me like a child.

“When I share something, people find it amusing even cinematic and gave me magic pen. The pen writes my wildest dreams and emotions in appropriate words. Giving peace to me and relatability to my readers.”

After brief conversation about her young life. I came back to my compartment. While I saw these techy youngsters. There were three boys and two girls. Even with this naked eye, I could see the fight between them. Each of them confined to each corner. Hastily working together. I felt sorry for them. People can’t waste their best phase of their life in silly ego clashes. Never once I faced egoistic people in this train. I found people here so lovely. They were generously kind. It felt like, this was the best journey I ever had in my life. Tomorrow morning these all would end. My stomach twitched at the thought. But I knew that is life.

When the evening came by, I was playing with Cerene and Roshan. I had a good time.

I FEEL ENTHUSIASTIC, BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN WITH THEM... WE TALK THINGS IN THEIR OWN CHILD LANGUAGE AND IT SEEMS LIKE, I HAVE FORGOTTEN MY LANGUAGE. FIGHTS, LAUGHTER, CRYING IN EVERY THING THEY SEEM TO BE AN ADVANCED VERSION OF ME... I TOOK THEIR HANDS IN MINE... I THOUGHT I WAS DIRECTING THEM. BUT I REALISE THAT THEY WERE THE ONE’S WHO IS GUIDING ME...

When I returned to the compartment, there was darkness in Rebecca and Thomas face. Wondering what happened. I asked them.

My phone has rung and Thomas attended to tell that I will call back later. It seems to be my secretary, worrying about my whereabouts leaving the business enterprise with her. Thomas had cut the phone call. Thinking it might hurt me somehow. And here I am facing two gloomy faces of Thomas and Rebecca.

“Did you run away from your home child?” she asked with sorrow in her voice. I sat by her knees and held her hand I told I will make everything clear.

“I am originally from France. I lived in le Havre near Belgium borders of france. The person who called is my secretary”

“Do you run chocolate industry” asked Rebecca. I secretly admired her innocence.

“No grandma, I owned a cosmetic company.”

“Do you know what impact it will have in your parents”

“I don’t know about my dad’s whereabouts since I was born, my mom was raising myself and my sister independently, their careers demanded them to go to different cities. I also wished to wander around the world. I had a kind neighbourhood auntie. She looks like the old miss in 1st compartment. I accompanied her during the last days of her life. she had always wanted to be a model, so she would ask me to makeup. she used to get allergies for quite many products so I studied on her skin type and made products at home. I was able to make her smile in her last days of her life. She died and that was huge blow in my life. In remembrance of her, I started this organization named feather touch.it was a huge success. Then the market became heavily competed and I was quite famous. I had fans club. I couldn’t go outside because of safety. The life of elite was too tough, I had to wear makeup all time. I had to show variations in costumes. of course, I can’t wear costumes of my choice, I wear sponsored ones. I was restricted at every move. I was forced on a lifelong diet. I missed every flavour of life. I actually decided to take a vacation considering it would make things right but I knew I had only one life. I did not want any money or fame; it was a quick decision. I knew convincing people around me would take time. People will look me, as if I am mad to leave a good elite life. I have had enough of all this. I came out from my apartment threw the sim, removed my makeup, purchased necessaries and got in the train”

Both were shocked to a greater extent. “I didn’t know, we were travelling with the business tycoon,” said Thomas.

“The word itself made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want my past life to intrude with this new peaceful present. Yet this happening, ruined my peace. I started sobbing.

Rebecca took me in her arm “we would not reveal your identity child, know what your past doesn’t seem real at all, its fake, it looks like a bad dream, the good ones are yet to come”

Thomas gave me tissues. After that everything was bliss.

I went to check on Ryan.

He walks on my right side.

It's not like he is walking with me

We are still strangers

People are talking

Everything is blur.

With only him in my focus like the portrait mode in camera.

I see him. He also feels the same...

I could tell you

I don't know why

He takes my hand and holds it.

Everyone is there

But no one notices.

I feel rush of tears in my eyes. It's not like I am happy I am emotional

We are walking. He exactly feels what I feel

And the point comes

Where we have to leave our hands

Letting go... is the toughest... But still I had no other go...

He looks at my eyes

I woke up!?

When I went to check on him. He was nowhere to be found. I made my bed lay down. I thought I won’t care. But I was worried. What if he got down the station before I got up? I would never see him again. I slept and this awkward dream woke me up. No, Ryan would never do that. One could see from the eyes of the people if not words.

The train was standing, I got down to see if it was a station, it’s not.

I checked Ryan’s compartment; he was still not there. I felt anxious, I missed him somewhere. I felt bad. I decided to go for a small walk. If it’s going to take time.

I got down, there were people at least 5 standing. They were working on train wheel. It was too dark to see clearly. I recognized the waiter from our compartment.

“Miss, you would better me in the compartment while we fix this issue”, I sort of hate when gentlemen like these prefer ladies to stay away from issues.

“what’s the issue?”

I asked, he said, they have never encountered such a problem. “The sensors told the train to stop immediately or it would be danger. We are trying to figure out what the problem is but we don’t know. Our train technician was ill and was admitted one day back.”

I heard a voice behind me “The shop that was google map is closed, we have to find for alternate solutions” that’s Ryan!!

I turned with the smile. He said in a nonchalant manner “you look too bright in this sleepy time”,

I knew he was mentioning that I was happy to see him. Having no energy to act out.

I exclaimed “where have you been? I couldn’t find you in train”.

“I was in, next to your compartment with those young engineering people”. Idea splashed me through.

Given no options, I said that these people might be of some help to the issue.

Waiter was resistive but Ryan supported. “You have something in that little brain of yours”

While I was with them, they were working on a automobile projects, it might be of some help”

“I will call them” Ryan said and dialled in his mobile.

Within 5 mins the whole team was here. I learnt their names quickly. The team lead name is Michael and there was a talkative yet informative girl moana. The guy whom I have seen fighting before was Ziro. Other people where charlotte and Oliver.

They have brought a big bright lamp which I have seen they have used it to work at night.

Michael asked from which sensor did they encounter the problem.

“From the wheels”

Moana kneeled down near the wheels. After few minutes of analysis.

“It’s the rail wear” she ascertained.

“Wear occurs due to interaction of rail and wheel. It includes abrasive wear and adhesive wear.

Jendel defined the concept of mild and severe wear. Mild wear takes place slowly.”

Oliver said “Mild wear is observed at the wheel tread and rail crown. Here the wheel tread is the victim”

I did not understand much. I asked if there is any solution.

Ryan had googled in the meantime “lubrication” he said

“Lubrication is quite expensive but if not done properly, we need to replace the entire compartment which is far more costly. Old days they used to lubricate manually. Nowadays we have automatic lubrication systems in train.” Ryan finished.

“There is lubricating device attached here” Ziro showed the light upon it.

“Weather conditions are of particular concern to these lubricators. The applicator nozzles when not used for a long time in summer starts clogging; this leads to improper functioning of the lubrication system. This problem is frequently faced in many parts of Australia, where summers are hot. Lubricators need to be cleaned before the start of winter in cold countries like Sweden as well. This procedure is important as the nozzles of these lubricators may clog in winter due to no lubrication during winter.”

“Where does the lubrication oil come from?” he asked.

The engine drivers explained about that. The conclusion was the oil has been lost due to clogging. There are now two things to be done.

First, we need to fix the clogging. second, we need more lubrication oil to make the train moving. It was 2.35 am and we were not close to any stations.

“What oil is used for lubrication?” I asked

“For lubricant base oil use, the vegetable derived materials are preferred. Common ones include high oleic canola oil, castor oil, palm oil, sunflower seed oil and rapeseed oil from vegetable, and tall oil from tree sources.” Ryan said.

“Though these oils are prepared in factories and have specifications, for time being hand made oils can be sufficient”

Idea shot up. “Why can’t we get our resources from nearby green areas?”

Waiter told me “Miss, your idea is fanciful, who knows to prepare the oil”

Ah, I knew the answer. “Of course, I have a plan for that Mr.”

Ryan smiled at me.

“Thomas?” he asked.

We went to wake up Thomas and stated the issue didn’t seem to understand much of it, but he said

“I can prepare oil in 30 mins my child. If that’s what you needed let’s get started.”

The whole compartment was lit. Everyone was awake and was willing to do help of any sort.

We gathered and discussed. It was decided that the students would fix the clogging issue and myself Ryan are going to find seeds to make oil. It was 3.03am. Adolf and Zara offered to help so we decided to go in different directions.

Rebecca and Isabella offered to take care of the children. They were sleeping. I was wondering it would be a good story to tell them. They would be excited, so am I.

We took the needed accessories. Pepper spray for wild animals. Wore bug creams to repel insects. Baskets for collecting seeds about which Thomas have gave us a brief lecture about. We were almost ready. We had our phones charged and Michael gave us the frequency emitter. Using which, he set a frequency that we could hear nothing, but that would sound too much for animals so they won’t come near us.

we planed the zones and split up. It was still dark. Yet moon gave us light. we used torches in phone occasionally.

At first, we were silent, I remembered my dream. It seemed like happening. Only that we weren’t holding hands and No one is around us.

“How do you know my name”

“Well, I was around when you were speaking over phone, you seem so curious, I wonder whether your name is to be maintained a secret?”

“No No” his cheeks dimpled. Thank God, he didn’t accuse me eaves dropping.

“Did you take something for your allergies”

“Ah, I forgot, wait!”

My dress got stuck in thorns of the nearby bush, not just one or two it was sharp and small. I was patiently taking them. Ryan kept aside his things and helped me. “You smell of jasmine” he said.

This time, I smiled.

Then I remembered him saying.

“How did you know that I am having allergies?”

“I saw allergy pills in your bag when you were buying tickets in stationed”

I stood for some seconds reflecting. He went ahead. I ran behind him to keep in pace.

“You ought to be careful Kylie, don’t catch up allergies”. His voice was serious and I didn’t know this amusing man could speak like this.

I nodded.

“Did you find Emma foster”

“Not yet”

“I want to take look at your trunk” I said.

“Always welcome “he said.

“Only until tomorrow morning” I said.

I am sure it disturbed him. I saw the time it was 4.05am. The sun was hideous now. We could move on without torches. I sat by the lake; my legs got sore. Ryan took an empty bottle to bring water. From where I sat, I spotted sunflowers. The opposite side of the lake. Ryan came back with a water.

I drank and felt peace. The taste was nowhere near to the filtered water we get in bottles. He sat beside me. I would have rushed up but I need to gain strength in my legs. Sun was raising up. The whole scene was gorgeous. Now again, I made a quick decision.  Now or never. I showed the sunflower to Ryan. He was excited at the finding. I uttered these words

“You stop nowhere, yet my gaze follows you everywhere. When you vanish out of blue, it seems dark and cold. My petals feel droopy but still I was patiently looking out for you. Now comes the day. Its summer and you give the brightest smile from sky. The dew on my petal gives on a new shine.”

“Like a SUNflower” he said. I shrugged my shoulders. We were smiling and got up to work. We collected the seeds. I informed Adolf and Zara. They have collected some seeds to. It seemed Adolf knee was twisted and Zara was almost breathless as she spoke and walked along by supporting his weight. We were walking back

He gave me a sunflower and said “I like you more than you could imagine”

“Ah, very well, now I could imagine” my face glowed differently.

I was feeling free and myself after a long time. I felt like I could even face the worst disaster in the world with Ryan by my side.

I asked Ryan.

“I Thought you always go for beauty.”

“Oh well, do I look like that(laughing). But I fall for gestures, you know.”

“Yeah, I could see that.”

“But I think it’s better if I change my mind. Between you look good. Tbh more than good. “

We reached the place. Thomas rushed to us. Got the seeds and started the process. I thought of helping him. Rebecca said that she would help Thomas and asked me to rest for a while.

Ryan went to Michael and team. They had almost completed the work. They were enjoying the work. Oliver sprayed the water over Ziro using the sprayer they had for working on clogs, Ziro hands were as black coal and he rushed to Oliver in sweet revenge. There was laughter elsewhere. It felt really good.

I saw the time 6.04am.

Isabella was distributing lemonade, that Thomas brought to everyone working there. I helped her to distribute.

Ryan returned. Noone is allowing me to help. Ryan complained. He was sweating like anything. Yet he was radiant. He gulped down the lemonade.

“You wanna see the trunk, come with me then”

I opened the windows and settled down, he handed me the trunk and sat beside me. I told

“you smell of mint” he smiled

“Do I?” he gave a peck on my cheek.

I opened the trunk. Inside I found car toys and few books. They were printed in hard paperback and all these books were fairy tales. I opened the book and was swishing through pages.

“Know what I knew every word memorized in my mind, I could even narrate in my sleep” I could feel pain in those words. He badly wanted to know his real parent’s whereabouts.

I turned to the front page.

The boat publications. Below that the author of the book was Emma foster.

“This is why you have been searching this lady”. He gestured a yes. “This is my first move, I knew its vague, I contacted the publications explained my situation and got the authors details they were working with in the publication year dated back 1987”

Something caught my eye. I was stunned and couldn’t utter a word. I closed the trunk. Took Ryan by hand and rushed to doors just as Isabella climbed in.

“Miss, Are you Emma foster?”

She was shocked, then came a yes in mild voice.

I looked at Ryan. He was out of words. It was his turn.

“Do you write fairy tales?”. In the meantime, I brought the trunk to her. There was stifle.

She wept bitterly. I provided her tissues.

“Ryan took her by shoulder and we sat down in a compartment”

“Emma, why didn’t you tell your original name to me?”

I am living in a changed identity child; I am originally from Russia so is Ryan.

“I am so sorry for your loss, Ryan”. Emma unravelled the mystery.

Ryan was born in a wealthy family. He was an only child. During Soviet Union collapse in 1991, Ryan was 4 years old. I was working there, as a governess for him. Ryan’s father was doing underground co-operation with Ukraine, which Yardley, Ryan’s mother has no idea. When there was a miscommunication. They decided to kill the family. Somehow, we knew the news from a local butcher, who was also a part of it. Poor Yardley sacrificed herself to save Ryan’s life. It was me she pleaded to take Ryan to a safe place. Everything went out as planned except for, I didn’t know I was followed. I was working there for more than 10 years with the family, so I am not to be left out. When we landed in Australia, I was sure they will kill me and in order to safe guard Ryan, who was sleeping at the time, I left him in a ship were families aboard. I put the sleeping Ryan over the trunk and left the place. But by grace I was able to live this long time.

She was touching Ryan’s head. God knows how much I worried for this child. Yardley would be happy on seeing you from heaven. She got up to leave.

Ryan was like stone until she left. He broke open. He cried silently. I knew it must be terrible for him. I just let him be. He finally asked

“How did you find this woman was Emma”

“When I opened the pretext page I saw a poem, which she used to hear in her iPod, sung by his brother”

“She told her name was Isabella but once when I saw her hanky it was lettered as E.”

“So, this little brilliant girl saved me my past mystery.” I smiled with a twinkle in my eyes.

“You don’t are about my past huh? you didn’t ask me anything”

“Anything but whatever I said, you treated me as a pervert, if I had asked what’s your past, you would have pushed me from the train”

He was so serious that I was couldn’t help my laughing.

 “Anyways I don’t care what your past is, now that it’s clear that you are mine”

“Nobody said that, I might be married”

“I don’t think so who would leave such a beautiful wife to travel alone”

‘Ah, that’s enough, let’s get back to the work.”

We went out Thomas waved his hands.

We went near. Lubricant was almost done. clogs were cleared. The young team was cleaning their clothes in nearby lake. I could hear their chuckling sounds.

Rebecca came back with a cassette. These audios are recorded while you were young, you can hear your moms and dads voice in there too. Ryan thanked her like anything.

Ryan asked me what I am planning to do when I land in station.

“I think it’s too early to decide”

He said he is planning to get a job there and spend time with Emma to know his parents.

“What is the young man saying?” Thomas asked.

“He wants to know where I will be residing in the town” I said and strolled a few steps

 “If you want, I can offer you to sell my lemonade and jasmine perfume in gold coast”. Thomas shouted and everyone around heard it. I laughed.

“I wish to water and grow plants with you” I shouted back. I ran towards Thomas and Rebecca. They both hugged me. Ryan took a photograph of we 3 of us. With me putting hands over Thomas and Rebecca shoulders. Roshan and Cerene were awake, came running to us like a storm. Roshan slipped off Cerene helped him to get up. I saw Emma, her eyes were shining.

Well, this journey changed my life. I wish this could stay forever but nonetheless destiny is never settled at a place or situation. destiny is always a journey; I will always be travelling.

 

 

I feel strange. This life moves by prediction of what would happen next. It should not be like this. The events must release dopamine if not adrenaline. don’t you think its way to systematic? I hate those plans and their perfection. Shouldn’t you decide things on the go and savor it. Instead of mourning over that the event did not go by the planned way. There is not a single event on earth that has happened exactly as planned. It’s definitely prone to changes. don’t you ever wonder why? I sincerely hope you get the answer soon.

I was waiting in the railway station, glancing my watch from time to time. I was given no choices than to leave on my own. I was kind of relieved that I won’t regret having made this decision as this i only choice left. There were 4 trains till midnight. I had a money that could last for month, given I don’t spend it on any luxuries. I can’t trust anyone I knew as they might report me to old life. Again, I was pleased, that I have no other go, than to live a new life in a new place. I saw the LED station board, it had 4 trains. I saw someone behind me ushering in phone.

“I am alright, can you stop worrying, I am done convincing, give me some peace, respect my decision, will contact you if anything goes wrong, good bye”

That was some young fellow, he got the ticket for the Ghan train.  I googled for more details. It is the largest distance travelling train in Australia about 3000km. I had no idea where to go yet I was sure this train would give me enough time to briefly contemplate my next decision. I got the same ticket. This is the first choice I have made in my new life.

There was a crowd behind me. When I was swiftly taking out the money, I spilled out my allergy pills into bag.

I boarded the train; it was very humid inside. deciding to stand by the door, I got down my berth. As I was walking by, I heard someone gasping. The train blew its horn.  I made my ears sharper. I could hear the wheels rolling and again a gasping sound with a mild voice

 “Here here”. I turned to the compartment.

It was my ticket partner in a worse state. I rushed if I could do something. He pointed the bag. I brought the bag near him; with struggles we found the breather. I was quick enough to powder the tablet. He almost fainted. while he was regaining, I was lost in my thoughts. If it was not for him, I would have boarded different train. Who would have saved him? he was there sitting smiling in gratitude. This time I watched him closely.

He does not look too smart, but had an attitude that would be sought after. His chin was like my idol Aaron deng, I thought he was a brother of him or something like that. This temporary illness could not steal his charm. Not by looks but there was something amusing about him, that I could see in his eyes. I was lost in my world until he gave a slight giggle.

“What you got some panic attack or something?” I realized I was staring and got up to leave.

I expected a thank you. He ushered “Are you travelling alone?”. I am a fool to think that people would not notice me.

 “Not your concern anyway.” I was pretty rude yet it did not affect him at all.

“My friend, it’s not a cliché, I was just asking, you are my life saver, I owe you”. I was processing. Definitely I can’t trust the stranger, yet I have no plans after getting off the train.

“So do me a favor?” I asked. His carriage was empty. He moved his luggage and signaled me to sit in a polite manner.

I continued “I want to know about cities in Australia where I can have job and a peaceful life”. The answer came fast than I have imagined.

“The Gold Coast can be an extremely affordable city to live in. Accommodation rates are generally lower than in capital cities, with rooms in a share house starting from as low as $135 per week in great areas such as Southport and Surfers Paradise.”

“You seem to stick to that; Does it matter a lot to you”

“I thought you need more about the city”

I cursed myself “Continue”.

His face was inexpressive, I felt like I am hearing a radio. It didn’t feel like I am conversing with a human.

“It wasn't long ago the best meals on the Gold Coast came served with batter and chips. Now some of the country's best young chefs are setting up shop, offering more innovative high-end dining options than either Noosa or Byron Bay. Buses operate up and down the Gold Coast Highway, which runs parallel to the coast – but few locals use them.

 There's two Gold Coasts

Comparing the southern Gold Coast to the northern Gold Coast is like comparing two entirely different destinations – don't do it. There's a cultural divide which kicks in”

He was perfectly addressing what I want to know about. Still, I did not let out my grateful expression.

“Is there anything else specifically you want to know?”

“What about climate and its specializations?”

“The city is a major tourist destination with a sunny, subtropical climate and has become widely known for its world-class surfing beaches, high-rise dominated skyline, theme parks, nightlife, and rainforest hinterland.” there was a pause.

There was a cool breeze, train was going through a bridge.

“Is the city safe?” looks like he sensed my anxiety.

“Unless, you step into water I would say you can be safe. The City of Gold Coast Council warned residents to be aware of stingrays, jellyfish, catfish, stonefish and sharks that frequent local lakes and canals.

When it comes to land, I think you are more dangerous for other people”

He was grinning. I was shockingly annoyed

“I think it would be helpful if I push you into the lake and check the facts for me. After all I am your life saver”. I said with a cunning expression.

“Looks like a murderer is on loose” he said scrutinizing me. I got up.

“Thank you for enlightening”.

Looked like he realized he asked the wrong question.

“Anytime! For life saver”.

The voice was already distant as I was walking towards the carriage.

Morning 5.30am

It was that time I noticed my carriage colleagues. There was an old couple.  I found them lovely, instantly. Grandma was sleepy grandpa was giving her tablets and water. She was very slow but he was patiently standing beside despite the train moving violently. After that he went to sleep. Both were asleep. I checked my phone. It was 5. 33am.I had thrown the sim off after I left the apartment and I brought a new sim at the station. I freshened up and we had waiter from dinner car. Not many people were awake. I ordered batter and chips.

It’s not new for me to take sudden impulse decisions. But I wondered why I ordered this. Then I remembered events from yesterday night.

I saw a lady sitting at the corner of the dinner car. Something about her was familiar. Her hair was very short like a gentle man. She had a striking resemblance of a well-wisher in my old life. I came back to reality, when she smiled up at me. I made my way towards her.

“Please take your seat” in a Russian accent.

“So where are you from”. I gazed at her. She looks trustable. But I have met her only now.

“Never mind, tell me how to call you?”

I replied.

“Kylie, your eyes speak before you utter anything” she smiled. I watched her she seemed very peaceful but something was disturbing her.

“You can call me Isabella” she said

Waiter came by “miss, your order is on the way” he turned to the old women. she ordered Pea and ham soup.

We were looking by the window. until I broke the silence. “Shall we talk, if you are willing too”

It looked like I was way too polite. “Anything you want life, love, people, places, war.”

Our dishes arrived. I was hungry. It was afternoon I ate something and had a coffee, while waiting for train, to be precise, while I didn’t know, what train to board in.

She asked me” what did you eat last?”

I mention about the coffee that I had in Starbucks. the name brought smile.

“Do you want to know the story behind it?”. I badly wanted to break the ice between us.

“Please go ahead” I beamed.

“You know them as a successful organization with multiple outlets in every country, quite true.

They did really well in adding new variations, attracting by limited time offers, aesthetically pleasing atmosphere what else a shop needs, but they failed in Australia.

This place has its own culture, we are highly specialized in coffees and the sugar laden cold coffees did suit the place. They are shutting down their outlets at the pace they have opened them.”

They stay where their sugar coffees are sought after, we stay by following our tradition”

“They can’t survive in a place that don’t suit them”

“Yes dear, so it’s better not to force on places that is not meant for them.   In an extreme, I would say, if they are not valued here, they lose their dignity everywhere”

I traced back to my old life. what went wrong there. I was valued too much that I lost my freedom. I was constantly looked upon for variations. If I did not meet up with the brainstorming idea, I met up with pressure until I have one.

I asked her what does she do for living.

“I am a writer. it’s quite a long time but it gave me enough money to live a contended life”

“what do you write?”

“Fables that instil good values” she said with pride.

“I also write for advertisements”

I almost gulped my food without chewing. Does she recognise me and want me to admit myself?  I thought of leaving the place quickly after the meal.

I offered my thanksgiving for her kind companion.

“child, feel free to come to my carriage, I would appreciate someone to hear my tales”

Rushing away I saw asthma boy moving to dinner car. He greeted me. I hurriedly smiled and went to my compartment.

I sat there. The couple staring at my bewildered face. Why does just a glimpse of past make me uncomfortable? I decided not to think more about it.

I looked around. There were 5 compartments in our carriage. The one that’s near to the door was my ticket partners. The second one was a couple and their cute two little children a boy and his young sister. Followed by mine, where the old couple is also present. Next to that we have a gang of youngsters travelling to participate in some events, I guess. The last one was Isabella’s.

There was some yelling happening in nearby compartment. There were 5 people and two of them fighting at high pitch.one guy was coming out of the college as he uttered these words.

“I was doing all the work by myself but you guys had all fun. Now you reason out me for the small mistake I made.”

“Ziro, you definitely did more than us, but it’s the part you done have went wrong and the whole team is suffering”

“you rejoiced when I did extra work, why you didn’t stop me then”. There was a silence. He slammed the seat and went out.

It is this part, the hardest of life. I am an adult who never think that going to youth would bring me happiness. It’s true I did not have responsibility by then but I was bearing lot fake truths in our mind. Not only me, I could see most youngsters in that state. They get too much attached to career or friends or relationship and want things work out in the way exactly how they have calculated. Thats not going to happen. They consider things so seriously. I feel sorry for them. They can be happy only when they stop predicting and accept things as they are. I wish I had grown up earlier and have released myself from that mental cage. Not that age matters, I could still see people in 40s being youngsters in mind. Everyone grows at a point. Noone other than themselves will be aware of it.

That young guy came again took his laptop and went out again. These screens have largely affected and altered the life of these kids.

I checked time. Its 11.24am.it was hot. I was wondering how I am going to survive this noon.

I was wearing cotton linen white shirt and a pink skirt. I purchased clothes before coming to station.as I had only 10 minutes to leave, but I did take something more important apart from my mobile and money.

The old man in my compartment was searching something in his luggage and gave the bottle to his beloved wife. She smiled at him. That looked like mint lemonade. Perfect for summer. Its rude to look what others eat. I turned towards window to make them comfortable. The old man handed me a bottle. “Chill yourself child”

I put a kind smile on my face and politely denied. He kept it near me and sat opposite.

“My daughter loves this so much, its prepared freshly from our farms.do drink and tell us how is it is?”

That’s it, I accepted. I opened the lid, sipped and indulged. It was like what you see in advertisements I felt as if splashed with ice. It soothed my nerves. The lime was very fresh and the mint smell filled the compartment. It was perfect. I felt happy instantly.

Old woman was looking at me. I opened up.

“I like lemonade. It’s this time of year that I like to grab my laptop, head for a cafe with some outdoor space and order up a fresh lemonade or two. There’s just nothing like it!

Every time I go to Le Pain Quotidien I order a mint lemonade. It’s the best, most tart and refreshing lemonade I have ever had and I can’t get enough of it.

But at around $4 for a medium sized glass with a TON of ice in it, it’s just not something I feel like buying every day. It’s just lemonade, right?!”

Gran pa said “Sure, fresh lemon juice, a little sugar, water and fresh mint is an absolutely magical combination. But, dang…

When you buy a drink at a sit-down spot, it’s not just the beverage you’re paying for. It’s the atmosphere, the table-space and the free Wi-Fi that all get factored into the final price.”

“I am impressed by your interpretation”. For the first time I saw his smile, with wrinkles crushing around his eyes.

 “Of course, you like it dear, your eyes widened like you saw a shark in ocean”

I laughed.

“yes grandma, it’s delicious”

“I can share the formula if you want”

“sure!!”

“Lemonade is good for your health honey but that depends on a few factors.”

Lemons are a fantastic source of vitamin C. Lemon pulp is also a great source of pectin, which might help you feel full longer. Over a cup of sugar is used in 95% of the lemonade I came across. That’s almost as much sugar as you’ll find in a can of Coke (and most other soft drinks). Geeeez…”

I was swallowed by her enthusiasm.

At the end of recipe, I told I will definitely try this at home.

At the same time, I was wondering what will be my home.

Grandpa said “and for the atmosphere you are always welcome to our farm”

I imagined a lush green yawn with this old couple spending quality time together. I assured them I would visit once I am settled in the town.

I asked their names-Rebecca and Thomas.

Thomas told “The recipe of lemonade is equally important to the ingredients you use and the love with which you pour into jug. It makes a lemonade a bit extra sweet.”

“Are these prepared from your farm, grandpa?”

“Yes, we prepared it just before we travelled to our daughter’s house, As I said she loves them the most, so we prepared enough for her and her kids to last this summer.”

“Your farm is in gold coast”

“yes, my child, this place has one of the finest soils for farming”.

This coincidence though, I thought.

“Excuse me”, Thomas went out of compartment.

Rebecca looked tired, I asked her if she would like to sleep. “she politely accepted my offer. I helped her laydown. Closed the curtains. She took my hand.

“You remind me of myself when I was young. Remember this sometimes wrong trains take us to the right place”

I once thought, why do I have a feeling that everyone I speak know that, I ran away from my past life. she slept within a minute. I turned off the lights and came out.

It was my ticket partner, talking in phone.

“I have asked for access in all documents stating my reasons”, a pause.

“Yes sir, I am Ryan” a small pause

“Thank you, sir, make sure things are clear in my way”.

I wasn’t intentionally hearing; I was trying to open the door that was stuck. “Life saver, Mind for a small talk”

I contemplated. I wanted to talk but something did not feel right. “No, I am going to get some air, see you later”

Still the handle was fastened. I wondered it was bolted from outside. Ryan came near me and was knocking the door. Thomas opened it.

 “Sorry my dear, I am used to bolt door out of conscious”

“Forgive me my children” he went inside.

 Now the wind was blowing hot air inside the carriage. I went out, splashed the water in my face neck hands. I felt cool instantly. My white cotton top got wet but with this wind it would dry up in no time. I checked the time.it was 12.35pm.

I took my phone and logged out from all my social media accounts. There were at least 100 messages from my secretary. I told her to take any decision on behalf me. I wonder if they filed any complaints about me went missing. Whatever happens there, has no concern over me here. At any cost, I must avoid police and legal checking’s until I get a proper job here.

I sort of like the journey. Thomas and Rebecca have been kind enough. I am intrigued by the Isabella and Ryan though he seems aloof, he is seemingly good.

Ryan came out with binoculars in hand. He moved to the other door, sat down and was watching through binoculars. Whatsoever I try not to notice but this man is definitely different and demanded my attention.

Finally, my curiosity won, “what can you see through it?”

“We are actually travelling near a sanctuary and national park”

He must have checked in map.

“So, you expect to see? kangaroos?”

“Ha, people can’t have kangaroos near tracks, you must think before you speak. Its Tasmanian devil”

Name sounds frightening “what if it gets in train, shall I close the doors”

“They don’t harm you little girl, Tasmanian Devils are aggressive if they feel threatened or are competing for food. They bare teeth, lunge, and emit loud, blood-curdling shrieks in the dark hours that made early settlers imagine demons had surrounded them in the wilderness.”

The train was slowing down for crossing.

“Ah, I spotted it, wanna see it?” he called me with a childlike expression in face.

I was already attracted by that gadget so without hesitation accepted his offer. He handed me the binoculars. It looked like something wildlife survivors would have damn heavy. Though he was bearing some weight with one hand. I looked through. I could spot some monkey like creatures moving from tree to tree.

“Can you see it?”

“Yeah, it looks like they are laughing’

“They are Quokkas are often called “the happiest animal on Earth” because of their big grins and friendly natures. However, it's important to remember that they're still wild animals. They can bite, and they can get aggressive when fighting over mates or when they feel threatened.”

I shuddered and smiled.

“You smell like mint” Ryan said. I put on a grim expression as I was looking through. We passed the quokkas.

He said “Tasmanian devil can sound bad but it’s better than quokkas”. I was wondering if he is mentioning himself as Tasmanian.

“Just because I don’t know animals, I won’t trust whatever you say about them.”

For the first time I was able shock Ryan. “Then check on google, I can bet on it”

I knew I can’t bet. Because I knew he is right. But still enjoying this amusing person. I bet that he can ask a question and I will answer the truth. He said he will also go by the same bet.

Finally, we both won as he stated a small fact wrong. I was hungry so I bid byes ate alone and returned to my compartment.

I decided to have some time alone, I heard songs and read books. Time passed by. Thomas and Rebecca were sleeping.

A young child came by. she asked whether I could go to the doors. I said that’s too dangerous. She told my brother had jumped from the door why not me.

I threw my book in aghast and rushed to the door. Her parents and a little boy were standing. The girl who came behind me. “Thank you, sister, for being kind to open the door for me”. The look on my face was so serious that the little boy went and took hold the hands of his mother.

Without knowing how to react I came to my place; well, I didn’t know kids are so cunning. She could not reach the door and if she had asked normally, we would have hesitated to open the door. “Damn!”. I will teach her a good lesson.

Evening 5.47pm.

I got up to have some coffee. Without caffeine my half of the brain seemed non functionable. I ordered one. They were cleaning the dining car. I decided to go back and asked the waiter to bring it to my place.

Isabella called me to her place. I introspected. In the morning, I was afraid she has identified me but looks of her are harmless. Given the fact even though she says who I am no one would believe her. She talks so well.so I decided to have quality time on my journey.

I sat down just in time waiter came by, I called him to notify I am in this compartment.

The waiter handed me and it was unbearably hot and I spilled some. The old lady rushed with her hankie and wiped the stain. I was surprised. The hankie looked expensive initialled E. she was wiping and I could not stand that.

“Miss, you need not do that, hand me a tissue”

“Are you alright, did it burn your skin”

I was pleased “I am superfine”. She sat back slowly. I could witness knee pain troubling her. I was wondering how swiftly she came to my aid.

Waiter returned now, after the coffee spilled, apologized and handed me tissues.

There was a brief silence. I watched the old women. She wore a kimono of violet and pink in velvet. Too hot for this summer. These kind of clothes only rich don’t mind wearing in summer as they are always in a refrigerated place in my observation. She was comfortable and looking out through the windows.

The small boy came in. He glanced me and then called Cinera.

She was hiding behind the hand bar and she nodded her head. He gave a stern look with his puppy face and she came in with heads drooping. Both were standing. The boy looked at me.

“I am sorry on behalf of my sister”

I expressed tenderness “It’s ok kiddo”. I was actually over whelmed by his maturity. I asked his name. He said that his parents have advised not to tell names to strangers.

“Roshan” his little sister shouted. He gave her a look. I was laughing now. I told her “Follow your brothers’ advice. He loves you so much”

She gave a naughty expression in her face. I searched my pocket gave them two chocolates. Roshan was quick enough to neglect that politely. I reasoned that their parents would have advised on getting food from strangers. Cinera was seeing the chocolate longingly I felt poor for the kid.

I remembered that I had a keychain sort of some doll, I went up my compartment and gave it to her. She happily accepted. Though Roshan remained somewhat aloof. I told that it was perfectly fine that you are on guard for yourself and your sister and I admire you.

He smiled for the first time and we bid all formal good byes.

In the whole scenario I forgot the old lady, Now she was sobbing terribly. I was shocked. I didn’t know what to do. I handed her the tissues I had.

She asked me to take a small iPod that was present in her luggage placed under seat. I took it out. She played a song sung by some little boy or that’s what it sounded like.

Song:

The setting sun hides its light in the night. The night sky can be bright and dark. If u ask it, About the darkness before dawn. It will tell you that’s just a part of tomorrow.?!

She wiped her tears and looked a little better. I asked her.

“A ginger tea or a cup of milk?” she denied.

“I shall go back to my compartment, feel free and call me when you are fine”

She was out of words. Held my hand and gestured me towards the seat. I sat down uncomfortably. To be honest it was the longest silence in my life.

“This small boy reminded me of my brother, he was my everything. He was my treasure; do you want to know what made me cry?”

Desperately yes, I thought. I could not make a head or tail out of it. she gave a faint smile

“Here we go”.

My parents died at young age. We were wealthy enough but very small children. My brother was 15 and I was 8 so our solicitor found a distant aunt and uncle to live with. They were kind enough. Only after our solicitor left, we saw their true faces. They had two children. Aunt Claire prohibited us to go to school. My brother pleaded that at least they could send me to school. They accepted under one condition that my brother should work as a bartender in their bar. He was working all day. I went to school came back and did chores for aunt Claire’s other two children.it was a hell but still I treasure those days with my brother. We managed to have good time somehow. We had a lake nearby. He would take me there for fishing and tell me stories. I never missed mom and dad when I was with him

One fine day the weather was rainy, a salubrious weather. I came down the house to check on my brother. He was happy told me we could play as rain has come no customers will come.

We decided to play our favourite game.in this game the participants should run far as they can and never turn back. If they turn back and found the participant behind him. He loses. We started the game. I ran as fast as I can. In the main road, I was pushed down by someone, I heard a thump sound behind me and by sound it was a horse. I ran again so that I don’t lose the game. Later I got tired. I started to search my brother. I was in a market and people were crowded at a place. I went there to peep in and i saw my brother lying. I asked an old fellow what happened. He told in order to save a girl he pushed himself to a horse and people don’t know whose child he is. My head was spinning. I went and cried near him. He was dead. Poor old lady continued with a shrill in her voice. I was done with two tissues by now.

“This song I heard is one we recorded in station those days in tape, I was protecting it and after the modern technologies arrived, I copied it to iPod and take wherever I go, this reminds me of the good old times and gives me hope” she held the iPod close to her heart.

I had no words to soothe her. Her pain was terrible when compared to what I have went through. I reflected that HOW SHE OVERCAME THE GUILT FEEL over the possibilities of avoiding her brother’s death. Like if she hadn’t called her brother for game or at least she could have turned back when she heard the horse falling down. She answered like she read my mind.

“I know these things I said, would hit you differently, but things cannot be changed, especially your past, learn to accept that few things are out of control. If I had only done like this in past, it would be better, you might think but remember you would have no idea on future. Follow your inner heart that’s all we can do”

“everyone’s problems are unique, pain that each person experiences cannot be compared to others. Respect your problems allow yourself to worry and overcome it. Just because it’s not the saddest problem in earth doesn’t mean you have to be grateful to whatever happens to you”

This past of her has affected me terribly. It was time for dinner. Thomas asked if I would like to join them. I said that I am not hungry. As he persisted, I asked him to get a glass of milk when he returns.

I was now alone. I allowed my mind to wander. I let myself cry. Time passed by. I felt better and even stronger I would say. I heard sounds of Cerene crying and went to take a look. Her parents want her to sleep then go for their dinner. She was resisting that she should get down. After calling by name, I addressed their parents she thanked me for the gift.

Her parents were shocked at a sudden stranger being friends with their child. I explained the situation. The young couple laughed and told that they knew Cerene did some mischief to me but never guessed it was this bad. This cheerful couple were Adolf-Zara.

After formal introduction, Adolf said that Roshan was always way to matured for his age. But he was exactly a brother that Cerene needs.

I said that I would be happy to take care of Cerene until they have dinner. After lot of persuading from my side. They left for dinner.

I read stories to Cerene; All I could see was her non sleepy big egg like eyes. And her questions were really unanswerable, I was getting tired, I wondered how her family managed to put up with her. The train was stationed. It was 8.56pm. Cerene asked that if I could take her for a small walk. She promised that she won’t utter a word to her parents to save me. I laughed “Of course Cerene, you shouldn’t lie to your parents, if not you I would say to them”

“Then do you accept, to take me for a walk” she said with her big bright eyes shining.

It seemed impossible to turndown this cute little pie’s request. while I was thinking, Cerene in a misery tone

 “Why is everyone in this world is strict like my big brother?” She let out a cute expression like sobbing.

“All right!” I said, I was done. I saw in the LED station chart that the train would leave by 10.15pm. That’s a lot of time for a small walk

We got down. She was holding my hand tightly. It was soft small hands. I held it without pressurising it.

Beauty of the child

We walked. It looked like; the sun has broken itself to million magic pieces. I was there watching her eyes, shining with reflection of sky. Having million reasons not to look at the starry night, I watched the moon smiling...

she soon began to rub her eyes and was dragging her feet while walking. I took her in my arm. Young lady fell asleep within seconds. I rushed to the compartment, lay her down. Made sure she is covered with blanket on all corners.

Zara returned. “I rushed first because I thought she might annoy you”.

I told she behaved good and I took her for walk to get some air and she slept. Zara was extremely happy. I could see the relief of mother. She can have peaceful night Afterall. And hope I can have some peace too.

MORNING 5.00AM

Next morning, I woke up, I did not feel the laziness in past life, where I was sticking to bed unwilling to get up. I sprang up to freshen. I thought of wearing some makeup. One day before, I was a stranger but not now, things are changing. I am getting friends and some might continue for life long. My skin is finally breathing and I did not want to ruin up now. I wore my comfy green tees and pink pants. I remembered Ryan’s compliment; you smell like mint. I sprayed a jasmine perfume that Thomas gifted when I gave him a pair of shoes that I have bought for myself in case I need to walk long distance. Thomas told he prepared the perfume by himself, with organic jasmines from his farm. I could visualize the farm full of jasmine before my eyes. I came out near the door with laptop. It was Ryan. I did not expect anyone this early in morning it was just 5 min passed 5.

I opened my mouth to greet him. he asked “May I know your good name”

“Kylie”

“Kylie, can you help me with some document searching?”

I sat beside him and nodded my head. He handed his laptop and asked me to find any name called Emma foster. I assumed that he was doing that job and he passed it to me. Then is he going to relax now? I pondered. but never mind I have decided to help, then let me do that full heartedly.

I went through the documents it had 1,00,000 names. It was hardcopy scanned document, so we cannot search by words. After 10 minutes. I looked Ryan. He was concentrating the document in his phone.

 I told “I can look in phone. Take your laptop”. He neglected and was seriously looking at his phone. I once thought, he didn’t hear me. When I was about to repeat, what I have just said.

He replied “beautiful eyes cannot be spoiled”. My heart warmed but I  was looking at laptop as I never heard anything he said.

We both searched vigorously and completed almost 50,000 documents approximately.

My eyes were getting sore, he got the laptop from me and asked me to rest.

I accepted as I could no longer concentrate yet I want to help him very much.

I said that I want to ask the question that we bet on yesterday.

“’Go ahead” he said shook his head

“Where are you from, why are you travelling?”

He asked “Do you want to know why I asked you to search this name”

“I am quite brilliant but I don’t know about everything that’s happening”

“Ah, I see, let me give you some insight about myself” he could answer the question in a sentence but thank God he didn’t.

It was my 23rd birthday. After the party was over at night my father came by me and shared the truth about me. We were a very good family. My father was in navy and my mom a home maker. I had 3 sisters two brothers.it was a family that you would never be bored of.

“I would!!?” I asked in a different tone.

“Oh man, why do take everything I say as a cliché, I would better be careful” I chuckled.

Back to narration.

On my birthday, my father said that I wasn’t his child by birth. He was least concerned about it and was never willing to share, but it was my mom told him that I had the right to know about myself. what had happened was… (it was a flashback inside the flashback)

September 11 1991, I was found in the ship my father allotted to renovate. He told that after all passengers left by, I was sitting on a trunk looking at the moon. When he asked me, I said I was hungry and he took me home served me meal. For next few days, he was searching details about me. All he knew was…

“Was??” I urged

“I travelled with a lady and whose whereabout was unknown by then “

“And now?”

“Well, by investigation of trunk I had, I know I need to find Emma foster”

“A letter or something “I asked

“Sort of, I actually found that long ago but my mother was afraid to send me. She thought she would lose me.”

I related it with the phone conversation he had while getting the ticket.

“You can take a look at trunk if you want, it’s besides the left side of my luggage in upper berth”

I got up.

I heard Thomas voice “Oh dear, I was searching you everywhere”

“Let’s eat breakfast together, Rebecca has asked about your where abouts million times and you are here with this young man”

Ryan seemed to be proud at this notice. There was a silence.

“Grandpa, this is Ryan, my friend, let go eat breakfast” Poor Rebecca she is diabetic patient. I can’t make her starve I thought.

Thomas said “Let’s call your friend too, join us Ryan”. Ryan was happy at the invitation and at once joined with us.

While we were moving to the dinner car. He whispered behind my ears. “How do you know my name?”. I myself wasn’t clear how, then it strike through, the telephonic conversation. I didn’t know how to manage. I was just blinking. And we sat for breakfast. It was Lamingtons and iced VoVo.

Iced VoVo has been my favourite in Australia. The wheat-flour biscuit with a strip of pink fondant on either side of raspberry jam and sprinkled with coconut is a sweet, soft and crunchy mouthful. 

Rebacca and Thomas on one side, we sat opposite.

Ryan replied “Its fine, I will forgive you”. I was like what…

Rebacca saved Ryan, she was asking where he was from and spoke about his home town. Rebacca had some distant relative from the same place. They talked about that. Though it was sort of boring, as I couldn’t make head or tail out of it. I was sort of liking Ryan’s company. The way he speaks to elders not too much respect or not showing that he is a young boy. He made them comfortable talking to their wavelength. He spoke about organic farming and Thomas was filling with many ideas. We were sitting there for long time after breakfast. At one point, I was even jealous of Ryan, of the attention he got from Thomas and Rebecca, but then I was reminded of my past life, where I was constantly running away from attention and instantly felt comfortable.

After breakfast I decided to check on Isabella. Poor lady, I have developed a soft corner for her.

I went to her compartment; she was hearing the song from her iPod. Those lines, especially after hearing her flash back gave me goosebumps. I thought she needed her own space and was moving when accidently I stepped on the luggage which almost tripped me off.

Ryan who came behind me panicked for a moment. Asked if I am Oki, I nodded. The miss noticed me and asked me to take a seat. She was still hearing the song. I watched her. Her hair though short had a perfect shine. She must have been a beauty when she was young. I assumed.

After finished her song, she turned to me. I complimented her hair.

Curiously, I asked if she cut her hair for sales. She laughed and said she would never do that for money. Then with a sadness in her face. She told me.

After my brother died, I was psychologically hurt to a larger extent, I once wanted to end my time. But I know that he would never have liked that. I took my scissors went before mirror and cut my hair as short as I can like boy’s summer cut. I smiled at mirror. He smiled back at me.

At once horror filled my brain, I thought its some ghost or something. I realized that they were twins.

“twins?”

“Yes, after that I never liked to grow my hair long and I never see mirror unless I wanted to see him”

I was taken aback by her love.

I want this sad phase to end. I asked her to speak about her writings. Her eyes widened and she told me like a child.

“When I share something, people find it amusing even cinematic and gave me magic pen. The pen writes my wildest dreams and emotions in appropriate words. Giving peace to me and relatability to my readers.”

After brief conversation about her young life. I came back to my compartment. While I saw these techy youngsters. There were three boys and two girls. Even with this naked eye, I could see the fight between them. Each of them confined to each corner. Hastily working together. I felt sorry for them. People can’t waste their best phase of their life in silly ego clashes. Never once I faced egoistic people in this train. I found people here so lovely. They were generously kind. It felt like, this was the best journey I ever had in my life. Tomorrow morning these all would end. My stomach twitched at the thought. But I knew that is life.

When the evening came by, I was playing with Cerene and Roshan. I had a good time.

I FEEL ENTHUSIASTIC, BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN WITH THEM... WE TALK THINGS IN THEIR OWN CHILD LANGUAGE AND IT SEEMS LIKE, I HAVE FORGOTTEN MY LANGUAGE. FIGHTS, LAUGHTER, CRYING IN EVERY THING THEY SEEM TO BE AN ADVANCED VERSION OF ME... I TOOK THEIR HANDS IN MINE... I THOUGHT I WAS DIRECTING THEM. BUT I REALISE THAT THEY WERE THE ONE’S WHO IS GUIDING ME...

When I returned to the compartment, there was darkness in Rebecca and Thomas face. Wondering what happened. I asked them.

My phone has rung and Thomas attended to tell that I will call back later. It seems to be my secretary, worrying about my whereabouts leaving the business enterprise with her. Thomas had cut the phone call. Thinking it might hurt me somehow. And here I am facing two gloomy faces of Thomas and Rebecca.

“Did you run away from your home child?” she asked with sorrow in her voice. I sat by her knees and held her hand I told I will make everything clear.

“I am originally from France. I lived in le Havre near Belgium borders of france. The person who called is my secretary”

“Do you run chocolate industry” asked Rebecca. I secretly admired her innocence.

“No grandma, I owned a cosmetic company.”

“Do you know what impact it will have in your parents”

“I don’t know about my dad’s whereabouts since I was born, my mom was raising myself and my sister independently, their careers demanded them to go to different cities. I wished to wander around the world. I had a kind neighbourhood auntie. She looks like the old miss in 1st compartment. I accompanied her during the last days of her life. she had always wanted to be a model, so she would ask me to makeup. she used to get allergies for quite many products so I studied on her skin type and made products at home. I was able to make her smile in her last days of her life. She died and that was huge blow in my life. In remembrance of her, I started this organization named feather touch.it was a huge success. Then the market became heavily competed and I was quite famous. I had fans club. I couldn’t go outside because of safety. The life of elite was too tough, I had to wear makeup all time. I had to show variations in costumes. of course, I can’t wear costumes of my choice, I wear sponsored ones. I was restricted at every move. I was forced on a lifelong diet. I missed every flavour of life. I actually decided to take a vacation considering it would make things right but I knew I had only one life. I did not want any money or fame; it was a quick decision. I knew convincing people around me would take time. People will look me, as if I am mad to leave a good elite life. I have had enough of all this. I came out from my apartment threw the sim, removed my makeup, purchased necessaries and got in the train”

Both were shocked to a greater extent. “I didn’t know, we were travelling with the business tycoon,” said Thomas.

“The word itself made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want my past life to intrude with this new peaceful present. Yet this happening, ruined my peace. I started sobbing.

Rebecca took me in her arm “we would not reveal your identity child, know what your past doesn’t seem real at all, its fake, it looks like a bad dream, the good ones are yet to come”

Thomas gave me tissues. After that everything was bliss.

I went to check on Ryan.

He walks on my right side.

It's not like he is walking with me

We are still strangers

People are talking

Everything is blur.

With only him in my focus like the portrait mode in camera.

I see him. He also feels the same...

I could tell you

I don't know why

He takes my hand and holds it.

Everyone is there

But no one notices.

I feel rush of tears in my eyes. It's not like I am happy I am emotional

We are walking. He exactly feels what I feel

And the point comes

Where we have to leave our hands

Letting go... is the toughest... But still I had no other go...

He looks at my eyes

I woke up!?

When I went to check on him. He was nowhere to be found. I made my bed lay down. I thought I won’t care. But I was worried. What if he got down the station before I got up? I would never see him again. I slept and this awkward dream woke me up. No, Ryan would never do that. One could see from the eyes of the people if not words.

The train was standing, I got down to see if it was a station, it’s not.

I checked Ryan’s compartment; he was still not there. I felt anxious, I missed him somewhere. I felt bad. I decided to go for a small walk. If it’s going to take time.

I got down, there were people at least 5 standing. They were working on train wheel. It was too dark to see clearly. I recognized the waiter from our compartment.

“Miss, you would better me in the compartment while we fix this issue”, I sort of hate when gentlemen like these prefer ladies to stay away from issues.

“what’s the issue?”

I asked he said, they have never encountered such a problem. “The sensors told the train to stop immediately or it would be danger. We are trying to figure out what the problem is but we don’t know. Our train technician was ill and was admitted one day back.”

I heard a voice behind me “The shop that was google map is closed, we have to find for alternate solutions” that’s Ryan!!

I turned with the smile. He said in a nonchalant manner “you look too bright in this sleepy time”,

I knew he was mentioning that I was happy to see him. Having no energy to act out.

I exclaimed “where have you been? I couldn’t find you in train”.

“I was in, next to your compartment with those young engineering people”. Idea splashed me through.

Given no options, I said that these people might be of some help to the issue.

Waiter was resistive but Ryan supported. “You have something in that little brain of yours”

While I was with them, they were working on a automobile projects, it might be of some help”

“I will call them” Ryan said and dialled in his mobile.

Within 5 mins the whole team was here. I learnt their names quickly. The team lead name is Michael and there was a talkative yet informative girl moana. The guy whom I have seen fighting before was Ziro. Other people where charlotte and Oliver.

They have brought a big bright lamp which I have seen they have used it to work at night.

Michael asked from which sensor did they encounter the problem.

“From the wheels”

Moana kneeled down near the wheels. After few minutes of analysis.

“It’s the rail wear” she ascertained.

“Wear occurs due to interaction of rail and wheel. It includes abrasive wear and adhesive wear.

Jendel defined the concept of mild and severe wear. Mild wear takes place slowly.”

Oliver said “Mild wear is observed at the wheel tread and rail crown. Here the wheel tread is the victim”

I did not understand much. I asked if there is any solution.

Ryan had googled in the meantime “lubrication” he said

“Lubrication is quite expensive but if not done properly, we need to replace the entire compartment which is far more costly. Old days they used to lubricate manually. Nowadays we have automatic lubrication systems in train.” Ryan finished.

“There is lubricating device attached here” Ziro showed the light upon it.

“Weather conditions are of particular concern to these lubricators. The applicator nozzles when not used for a long time in summer starts clogging; this leads to improper functioning of the lubrication system. This problem is frequently faced in many parts of Australia, where summers are hot. Lubricators need to be cleaned before the start of winter in cold countries like Sweden as well. This procedure is important as the nozzles of these lubricators may clog in winter due to no lubrication during winter.”

“Where does the lubrication oil come from?” he asked.

The engine drivers explained about that. The conclusion was the oil has been lost due to clogging. There are now two things to be done.

First, we need to fix the clogging. second, we need more lubrication oil to make the train moving.it was 2.35 am and we were not close to any stations.

“What oil is used for lubrication?” I asked

“For lubricant base oil use, the vegetable derived materials are preferred. Common ones include high oleic canola oil, castor oil, palm oil, sunflower seed oil and rapeseed oil from vegetable, and tall oil from tree sources.” Ryan said.

“Though these oils are prepared in factories and have specification for time being hand made oils can be sufficient”

Idea shot up. “Why can’t we get our resources from nearby green areas?”

Waiter told me “Miss, your idea is fanciful, who knows to prepare the oil”

Ah, I knew the answer. “Of course, I have a plan for that Mr.”

Ryan smiled at me.

“Thomas?” he asked.

We went to wake up Thomas and stated the issue didn’t seem to understand much of it, but he said

“I can prepare oil in 30 mins my child. If that’s what you needed let’s get started.”

The whole compartment was lit. Everyone was awake and was willing to do help of any sort.

We gathered and discussed. It was decided that the students would fix the clogging issue and myself Ryan are going to find seeds to make oil. It was 3.03am. Adolf and Zara offered to help so we decided to go in different directions.

Rebecca and Isabella offered to take care of the children. They were sleeping. I was wondering it would be a good story to tell them. They would be excited, so am I.

We took the needed accessories. Pepper spray for wild animals. Wore bug creams to repel insects. Baskets for collecting seeds about which Thomas have gave us a brief lecture about. We were almost ready. We had our phones charged and Michael gave us the frequency emitter. Using which, he set a frequency that we could hear nothing, but that would sound too much for animals so they won’t come near us.

we planed the zones and split up. It was still dark. Yet moon gave us light. we used torches in phone occasionally.

At first, we were silent, I remembered my dream. It seemed like happening. Only that we weren’t holding hands and No one is around us.

“How do you know my name”

“Well, I was around when you were speaking over phone, you seem so curious, I wonder whether your name is to be maintained a secret?”

“No No” his cheeks dimpled. Thank God, he didn’t accuse me eaves dropping.

“Did you take something for your allergies”

“Ah, I forgot, wait!”

My dress got stuck in thorns of the nearby bush, not just one or two it was sharp and small. I was patiently taking them. Ryan kept aside his things and helped me. “You smell of jasmine” he said.

This time, I smiled.

Then I remembered him saying.

“How did you know that I am having allergies?”

“I saw allergy pills in your bag when you were buying tickets in stationed”

I stood for some seconds reflecting. He went ahead. I ran behind him to keep in pace.

“You ought to be careful Kylie, don’t catch up allergies”. His voice was serious and I didn’t know this amusing man could speak like this.

I nodded.

“Did you find Emma foster”

“Not yet”

“I want to take look at your trunk” I said.

“Always welcome “he said.

“Only until tomorrow morning” I said.

I am sure it disturbed him. I saw the time it was 4.05am. The sun was hideous now. We could move on without torches. I sat by the lake; my legs got sore. Ryan took an empty bottle to bring water. From where I sat, I spotted sunflowers. The opposite side of the lake. Ryan came back with a water.

I drank and felt peace. The taste was nowhere near to the filtered water we get in bottles. He sat beside me. I would have rushed up but I need to gain strength in my legs. Sun was raising up. The whole scene was gorgeous. Now again, I made a quick decision.  Now or never. I showed the sunflower to Ryan. He was excited at the finding. I uttered these words

“You stop nowhere, yet my gaze follows you everywhere. When you vanish out of blue, it seems dark and cold. My petals feel droopy but still I was patiently looking out for you. Now comes the day. Its summer and you give the brightest smile from sky. The dew on my petal gives on a new shine.”

“Like a SUNflower” he said. I shrugged my shoulders. We were smiling and got up to work. We collected the seeds. I informed Adolf and Zara. They have collected some seeds to. It seemed Adolf knee was twisted and Zara was almost breathless as she spoke and walked along by supporting his weight. We were walking back

He gave me a sunflower and said “I like you more than you could imagine”

“Ah, very well, now I could imagine” my face glowed differently.

I was feeling free and myself after a long time. I felt like I could even face the worst disaster in the world with Ryan by my side.

I asked Ryan.

“I Thought you always go for beauty.”

“Oh well, do I look like that(laughing). But I fall for gestures, you know.”

“Yeah, I could see that.”

“But I think it’s better if I change my mind. Between you look good. Tbh more than good. “

We reached the place. Thomas rushed to us. Got the seeds and started the process. I thought of helping him. Rebecca said that she would help Thomas and asked me to rest for a while.

Ryan went to Michael and team. They had almost completed the work. They were enjoying the work. Oliver sprayed the water over Ziro using the sprayer they had for working on clogs, Ziro hands were as black coal and he rushed to Oliver in sweet revenge. There was laughter elsewhere. It felt really good.

I saw the time 6.04am.

Isabella was distributing lemonade, that Thomas brought to everyone working there. I helped her to distribute.

Ryan returned. Noone is allowing me to help. Ryan complained. He was sweating like anything. Yet he was radiant. He gulped down the lemonade.

“You wanna see the trunk, come with me then”

I opened the windows and settled down, he handed me the trunk and sat beside me I told

“you smell of mint” he smiled

“Do I?” he gave a peck on my cheek.

I opened the trunk. Inside I found car toys and few books. They were printed in hard paperback and all these books were fairy tales. I opened the book and was swishing through pages.

“Know what I knew every word memorized in my mind, I could even narrate in my sleep” I could feel pain in those words. He badly wanted to know his real parent’s whereabouts.

I turned to the front page.

The boat publications. Below that the author of the book was Emma foster.

“This is why you have been searching this lady”. He gestured a yes. “This is my first move, I knew its vague, I contacted the publications explained my situation and got the authors details they were working with in the publication year dated back 1987”

Something caught my eye. I was stunned and couldn’t utter a word. I closed the trunk. Took Ryan by hand and rushed to doors just as Isabella climbed in.

“Miss, Are you Emma foster?”

She was shocked, then came a yes in mild voice.

I looked at Ryan. He was out of words. It was his turn.

“Do you write fairy tales?”. In the meantime, I brought the trunk to her. There was stifle.

She wept bitterly. I provided her tissues.

“Ryan took her by shoulder and we sat down in a compartment”

“Emma, why didn’t you tell your original name to me?”

I am living in a changed identity child; I am originally from Russia so is Ryan.

“I am so sorry for your loss, Ryan”. Emma unravelled the mystery.

Ryan was born in a wealthy family. He was an only child. During Soviet Union collapse in 1991, Ryan was 4 years old. I was working there, as a governess for him. Ryan’s father was doing underground co-operation with Ukraine, which Yardley, Ryan’s mother has no idea. When there was a miscommunication. They decided to kill the family. Somehow, we knew the news from a local butcher, who was also a part of it. Poor Yardley sacrificed herself to save Ryan’s life. It was me she pleaded to take Ryan to a safe place. Everything went out as planned except for, I didn’t know I was followed. I was working there for more than 10 years with the family, so I am not to be left out. When we landed in Australia, I was sure they will kill me and in order to safe guard Ryan, who was sleeping at the time, I left him in a ship were families aboard. I put the sleeping Ryan over the trunk and left the place. But by grace I was able to live this long time.

She was touching Ryan’s head. God knows how much I worried for this child. Yardley would be happy on seeing you from heaven. She got up to leave.

Ryan was like stone until she left. He broke open. He cried silently. I knew it must be terrible for him. I just let him be. He finally asked

“How did you find this woman was Emma”

“When I opened the pretext page I saw a poem, which she used to hear in her iPod, sung by his brother”

“She told her name was Isabella but once when I saw her hanky it was lettered as E.”

“So, this little brilliant girl saved me my past mystery.” I smiled with a twinkle in my eyes.

“You don’t are about my past huh? you didn’t ask me anything”

“Anything but whatever I said, you treated me as a pervert, if I had asked what’s your past, you would have pushed me from the train”

He was so serious that I was couldn’t help my laughing.

 “Anyways I don’t care what your past is, now that it’s clear that you are mine”

“Nobody said that, I might be married”

“I don’t think so who would leave such a beautiful wife to travel alone”

‘Ah, that’s enough, let’s get back to the work.”

We went out Thomas waved his hands.

We went near. Lubricant was almost done. clogs were cleared. The young team was cleaning their clothes in nearby lake. I could hear their chuckling sounds.

Rebecca came back with a cassette. These audios are recorded while you were young, you can hear your moms and dads voice in there too. Ryan thanked her like anything.

Ryan asked me what I am planning to do when I land in station.

“I think it’s too early to decide”

He said he is planning to get a job there and spend time with Emma to know his parents.

“What is the young man saying?” Thomas asked.

“He wants to know where I will be residing in the town” I said and strolled a few steps

 “If you want, I can offer you to sell my lemonade and jasmine perfume in gold coast”. Thomas shouted and everyone around heard it. I laughed.

“I wish to water and grow plants with you” I shouted back. I ran towards Thomas and Rebecca. They both hugged me. Ryan took a photograph of we 3 of us. With me putting hands over Thomas and Rebecca shoulders. Roshan and Cerene were awake, came running to us like a storm. Roshan slipped off Cerene helped him to get up. I saw Emma, her eyes were shining.

Well, this journey changed my life. I wish this could stay forever but nonetheless destiny is never settled at a place or situation. destiny is always a journey; I will always be travelling.

I feel strange. This life moves by prediction of what would happen next. It should not be like this. The events must release dopamine if not adrenaline. don’t you think its way to systematic? I hate those plans and their perfection. Shouldn’t you decide things on the go and savor it. Instead of mourning over that the event did not go by the planned way. There is not a single event on earth that has happened exactly as planned. It’s definitely prone to changes. don’t you ever wonder why? I sincerely hope you get the answer soon.

I was waiting in the railway station, glancing my watch from time to time. I was given no choices than to leave on my own. I was kind of relieved that I won’t regret having made this decision as this i only choice left. There were 4 trains till midnight. I had a money that could last for month, given I don’t spend it on any luxuries. I can’t trust anyone I knew as they might report me to old life. Again, I was pleased, that I have no other go, than to live a new life in a new place. I saw the LED station board, it had 4 trains. I saw someone behind me ushering in phone.

“I am alright, can you stop worrying, I am done convincing, give me some peace, respect my decision, will contact you if anything goes wrong, good bye”

That was some young fellow, he got the ticket for the Ghan train.  I googled for more details. It is the largest distance travelling train in Australia about 3000km. I had no idea where to go yet I was sure this train would give me enough time to briefly contemplate my next decision. I got the same ticket. This is the first choice I have made in my new life.

There was a crowd behind me. When I was swiftly taking out the money, I spilled out my allergy pills into bag.

I boarded the train; it was very humid inside. deciding to stand by the door, I got down my berth. As I was walking by, I heard someone gasping. The train blew its horn.  I made my ears sharper. I could hear the wheels rolling and again a gasping sound with a mild voice

 “Here here”. I turned to the compartment.

It was my ticket partner in a worse state. I rushed if I could do something. He pointed the bag. I brought the bag near him; with struggles we found the breather. I was quick enough to powder the tablet. He almost fainted. while he was regaining, I was lost in my thoughts. If it was not for him, I would have boarded different train. Who would have saved him? he was there sitting smiling in gratitude. This time I watched him closely.

He does not look too smart, but had an attitude that would be sought after. His chin was like my idol Aaron deng, I thought he was a brother of him or something like that. This temporary illness could not steal his charm. Not by looks but there was something amusing about him, that I could see in his eyes. I was lost in my world until he gave a slight giggle.

“What you got some panic attack or something?” I realized I was staring and got up to leave.

I expected a thank you. He ushered “Are you travelling alone?”. I am a fool to think that people would not notice me.

 “Not your concern anyway.” I was pretty rude yet it did not affect him at all.

“My friend, it’s not a cliché, I was just asking, you are my life saver, I owe you”. I was processing. Definitely I can’t trust the stranger, yet I have no plans after getting off the train.

“So do me a favor?” I asked. His carriage was empty. He moved his luggage and signaled me to sit in a polite manner.

I continued “I want to know about cities in Australia where I can have job and a peaceful life”. The answer came fast than I have imagined.

“The Gold Coast can be an extremely affordable city to live in. Accommodation rates are generally lower than in capital cities, with rooms in a share house starting from as low as $135 per week in great areas such as Southport and Surfers Paradise.”

“You seem to stick to that; Does it matter a lot to you”

“I thought you need more about the city”

I cursed myself “Continue”.

His face was inexpressive, I felt like I am hearing a radio. It didn’t feel like I am conversing with a human.

“It wasn't long ago the best meals on the Gold Coast came served with batter and chips. Now some of the country's best young chefs are setting up shop, offering more innovative high-end dining options than either Noosa or Byron Bay. Buses operate up and down the Gold Coast Highway, which runs parallel to the coast – but few locals use them.

 There's two Gold Coasts

Comparing the southern Gold Coast to the northern Gold Coast is like comparing two entirely different destinations – don't do it. There's a cultural divide which kicks in”

He was perfectly addressing what I want to know about. Still, I did not let out my grateful expression.

“Is there anything else specifically you want to know?”

“What about climate and its specializations?”

“The city is a major tourist destination with a sunny, subtropical climate and has become widely known for its world-class surfing beaches, high-rise dominated skyline, theme parks, nightlife, and rainforest hinterland.” there was a pause.

There was a cool breeze, train was going through a bridge.

“Is the city safe?” looks like he sensed my anxiety.

“Unless, you step into water I would say you can be safe. The City of Gold Coast Council warned residents to be aware of stingrays, jellyfish, catfish, stonefish and sharks that frequent local lakes and canals.

When it comes to land, I think you are more dangerous for other people”

He was grinning. I was shockingly annoyed

“I think it would be helpful if I push you into the lake and check the facts for me. After all I am your life saver”. I said with a cunning expression.

“Looks like a murderer is on loose” he said scrutinizing me. I got up.

“Thank you for enlightening”.

Looked like he realized he asked the wrong question.

“Anytime! For life saver”.

The voice was already distant as I was walking towards the carriage.

Morning 5.30am

It was that time I noticed my carriage colleagues. There was an old couple.  I found them lovely, instantly. Grandma was sleepy grandpa was giving her tablets and water. She was very slow but he was patiently standing beside despite the train moving violently. After that he went to sleep. Both were asleep. I checked my phone. It was 5. 33am.I had thrown the sim off after I left the apartment and I brought a new sim at the station. I freshened up and we had waiter from dinner car. Not many people were awake. I ordered batter and chips.

It’s not new for me to take sudden impulse decisions. But I wondered why I ordered this. Then I remembered events from yesterday night.

I saw a lady sitting at the corner of the dinner car. Something about her was familiar. Her hair was very short like a gentle man. She had a striking resemblance of a well-wisher in my old life. I came back to reality, when she smiled up at me. I made my way towards her.

“Please take your seat” in a Russian accent.

“So where are you from”. I gazed at her. She looks trustable. But I have met her only now.

“Never mind, tell me how to call you?”

I replied.

“Kylie, your eyes speak before you utter anything” she smiled. I watched her she seemed very peaceful but something was disturbing her.

“You can call me Isabella” she said

Waiter came by “miss, your order is on the way” he turned to the old women. she ordered Pea and ham soup.

We were looking by the window. until I broke the silence. “Shall we talk, if you are willing too”

It looked like I was way too polite. “Anything you want life, love, people, places, war.”

Our dishes arrived. I was hungry. It was afternoon I ate something and had a coffee, while waiting for train, to be precise, while I didn’t know, what train to board in.

She asked me” what did you eat last?”

I mention about the coffee that I had in Starbucks. the name brought smile.

“Do you want to know the story behind it?”. I badly wanted to break the ice between us.

“Please go ahead” I beamed.

“You know them as a successful organization with multiple outlets in every country, quite true.

They did really well in adding new variations, attracting by limited time offers, aesthetically pleasing atmosphere what else a shop needs, but they failed in Australia.

This place has its own culture, we are highly specialized in coffees and the sugar laden cold coffees did suit the place. They are shutting down their outlets at the pace they have opened them.”

They stay where their sugar coffees are sought after, we stay by following our tradition”

“They can’t survive in a place that don’t suit them”

“Yes dear, so it’s better not to force on places that is not meant for them.   In an extreme, I would say, if they are not valued here, they lose their dignity everywhere”

I traced back to my old life. what went wrong there. I was valued too much that I lost my freedom. I was constantly looked upon for variations. If I did not meet up with the brainstorming idea, I met up with pressure until I have one.

I asked her what does she do for living.

“I am a writer. it’s quite a long time but it gave me enough money to live a contended life”

“what do you write?”

“Fables that instil good values” she said with pride.

“I also write for advertisements”

I almost gulped my food without chewing. Does she recognise me and want me to admit myself?  I thought of leaving the place quickly after the meal.

I offered my thanksgiving for her kind companion.

“child, feel free to come to my carriage, I would appreciate someone to hear my tales”

Rushing away I saw asthma boy moving to dinner car. He greeted me. I hurriedly smiled and went to my compartment.

I sat there. The couple staring at my bewildered face. Why does just a glimpse of past make me uncomfortable? I decided not to think more about it.

I looked around. There were 5 compartments in our carriage. The one that’s near to the door was my ticket partners. The second one was a couple and their cute two little children a boy and his young sister. Followed by mine, where the old couple is also present. Next to that we have a gang of youngsters travelling to participate in some events, I guess. The last one was Isabella’s.

There was some yelling happening in nearby compartment. There were 5 people and two of them fighting at high pitch.one guy was coming out of the college as he uttered these words.

“I was doing all the work by myself but you guys had all fun. Now you reason out me for the small mistake I made.”

“Ziro, you definitely did more than us, but it’s the part you done have went wrong and the whole team is suffering”

“you rejoiced when I did extra work, why you didn’t stop me then”. There was a silence. He slammed the seat and went out.

It is this part, the hardest of life. I am an adult who never think that going to youth would bring me happiness. It’s true I did not have responsibility by then but I was bearing lot fake truths in our mind. Not only me, I could see most youngsters in that state. They get too much attached to career or friends or relationship and want things work out in the way exactly how they have calculated. Thats not going to happen. They consider things so seriously. I feel sorry for them. They can be happy only when they stop predicting and accept things as they are. I wish I had grown up earlier and have released myself from that mental cage. Not that age matters, I could still see people in 40s being youngsters in mind. Everyone grows at a point. Noone other than themselves will be aware of it.

That young guy came again took his laptop and went out again. These screens have largely affected and altered the life of these kids.

I checked time. Its 11.24am.it was hot. I was wondering how I am going to survive this noon.

I was wearing cotton linen white shirt and a pink skirt. I purchased clothes before coming to station.as I had only 10 minutes to leave, but I did take something more important apart from my mobile and money.

The old man in my compartment was searching something in his luggage and gave the bottle to his beloved wife. She smiled at him. That looked like mint lemonade. Perfect for summer. Its rude to look what others eat. I turned towards window to make them comfortable. The old man handed me a bottle. “Chill yourself child”

I put a kind smile on my face and politely denied. He kept it near me and sat opposite.

“My daughter loves this so much, its prepared freshly from our farms.do drink and tell us how is it is?”

That’s it, I accepted. I opened the lid, sipped and indulged. It was like what you see in advertisements I felt as if splashed with ice. It soothed my nerves. The lime was very fresh and the mint smell filled the compartment. It was perfect. I felt happy instantly.

Old woman was looking at me. I opened up.

“I like lemonade. It’s this time of year that I like to grab my laptop, head for a cafe with some outdoor space and order up a fresh lemonade or two. There’s just nothing like it!

Every time I go to Le Pain Quotidien I order a mint lemonade. It’s the best, most tart and refreshing lemonade I have ever had and I can’t get enough of it.

But at around $4 for a medium sized glass with a TON of ice in it, it’s just not something I feel like buying every day. It’s just lemonade, right?!”

Gran pa said “Sure, fresh lemon juice, a little sugar, water and fresh mint is an absolutely magical combination. But, dang…

When you buy a drink at a sit-down spot, it’s not just the beverage you’re paying for. It’s the atmosphere, the table-space and the free Wi-Fi that all get factored into the final price.”

“I am impressed by your interpretation”. For the first time I saw his smile, with wrinkles crushing around his eyes.

 “Of course, you like it dear, your eyes widened like you saw a shark in ocean”

I laughed.

“yes grandma, it’s delicious”

“I can share the formula if you want”

“sure!!”

“Lemonade is good for your health honey but that depends on a few factors.”

Lemons are a fantastic source of vitamin C. Lemon pulp is also a great source of pectin, which might help you feel full longer. Over a cup of sugar is used in 95% of the lemonade I came across. That’s almost as much sugar as you’ll find in a can of Coke (and most other soft drinks). Geeeez…”

I was swallowed by her enthusiasm.

At the end of recipe, I told I will definitely try this at home.

At the same time, I was wondering what will be my home.

Grandpa said “and for the atmosphere you are always welcome to our farm”

I imagined a lush green yawn with this old couple spending quality time together. I assured them I would visit once I am settled in the town.

I asked their names-Rebecca and Thomas.

Thomas told “The recipe of lemonade is equally important to the ingredients you use and the love with which you pour into jug. It makes a lemonade a bit extra sweet.”

“Are these prepared from your farm, grandpa?”

“Yes, we prepared it just before we travelled to our daughter’s house, As I said she loves them the most, so we prepared enough for her and her kids to last this summer.”

“Your farm is in gold coast”

“yes, my child, this place has one of the finest soils for farming”.

This coincidence though, I thought.

“Excuse me”, Thomas went out of compartment.

Rebecca looked tired, I asked her if she would like to sleep. “she politely accepted my offer. I helped her laydown. Closed the curtains. She took my hand.

“You remind me of myself when I was young. Remember this sometimes wrong trains take us to the right place”

I once thought, why do I have a feeling that everyone I speak know that, I ran away from my past life. she slept within a minute. I turned off the lights and came out.

It was my ticket partner, talking in phone.

“I have asked for access in all documents stating my reasons”, a pause.

“Yes sir, I am Ryan” a small pause

“Thank you, sir, make sure things are clear in my way”.

I wasn’t intentionally hearing; I was trying to open the door that was stuck. “Life saver, Mind for a small talk”

I contemplated. I wanted to talk but something did not feel right. “No, I am going to get some air, see you later”

Still the handle was fastened. I wondered it was bolted from outside. Ryan came near me and was knocking the door. Thomas opened it.

 “Sorry my dear, I am used to bolt door out of conscious”

“Forgive me my children” he went inside.

 Now the wind was blowing hot air inside the carriage. I went out, splashed the water in my face neck hands. I felt cool instantly. My white cotton top got wet but with this wind it would dry up in no time. I checked the time.it was 12.35pm.

I took my phone and logged out from all my social media accounts. There were at least 100 messages from my secretary. I told her to take any decision on behalf me. I wonder if they filed any complaints about me went missing. Whatever happens there, has no concern over me here. At any cost, I must avoid police and legal checking’s until I get a proper job here.

I sort of like the journey. Thomas and Rebecca have been kind enough. I am intrigued by the Isabella and Ryan though he seems aloof, he is seemingly good.

Ryan came out with binoculars in hand. He moved to the other door, sat down and was watching through binoculars. Whatsoever I try not to notice but this man is definitely different and demanded my attention.

Finally, my curiosity won, “what can you see through it?”

“We are actually travelling near a sanctuary and national park”

He must have checked in map.

“So, you expect to see? kangaroos?”

“Ha, people can’t have kangaroos near tracks, you must think before you speak. Its Tasmanian devil”

Name sounds frightening “what if it gets in train, shall I close the doors”

“They don’t harm you little girl, Tasmanian Devils are aggressive if they feel threatened or are competing for food. They bare teeth, lunge, and emit loud, blood-curdling shrieks in the dark hours that made early settlers imagine demons had surrounded them in the wilderness.”

The train was slowing down for crossing.

“Ah, I spotted it, wanna see it?” he called me with a childlike expression in face.

I was already attracted by that gadget so without hesitation accepted his offer. He handed me the binoculars. It looked like something wildlife survivors would have damn heavy. Though he was bearing some weight with one hand. I looked through. I could spot some monkey like creatures moving from tree to tree.

“Can you see it?”

“Yeah, it looks like they are laughing’

“They are Quokkas are often called “the happiest animal on Earth” because of their big grins and friendly natures. However, it's important to remember that they're still wild animals. They can bite, and they can get aggressive when fighting over mates or when they feel threatened.”

I shuddered and smiled.

“You smell like mint” Ryan said. I put on a grim expression as I was looking through. We passed the quokkas.

He said “Tasmanian devil can sound bad but it’s better than quokkas”. I was wondering if he is mentioning himself as Tasmanian.

“Just because I don’t know animals, I won’t trust whatever you say about them.”

For the first time I was able shock Ryan. “Then check on google, I can bet on it”

I knew I can’t bet. Because I knew he is right. But still enjoying this amusing person. I bet that he can ask a question and I will answer the truth. He said he will also go by the same bet.

Finally, we both won as he stated a small fact wrong. I was hungry so I bid byes ate alone and returned to my compartment.

I decided to have some time alone, I heard songs and read books. Time passed by. Thomas and Rebecca were sleeping.

A young child came by. she asked whether I could go to the doors. I said that’s too dangerous. She told my brother had jumped from the door why not me.

I threw my book in aghast and rushed to the door. Her parents and a little boy were standing. The girl who came behind me. “Thank you, sister, for being kind to open the door for me”. The look on my face was so serious that the little boy went and took hold the hands of his mother.

Without knowing how to react I came to my place; well, I didn’t know kids are so cunning. She could not reach the door and if she had asked normally, we would have hesitated to open the door. “Damn!”. I will teach her a good lesson.

Evening 5.47pm.

I got up to have some coffee. Without caffeine my half of the brain seemed non functionable. I ordered one. They were cleaning the dining car. I decided to go back and asked the waiter to bring it to my place.

Isabella called me to her place. I introspected. In the morning, I was afraid she has identified me but looks of her are harmless. Given the fact even though she says who I am no one would believe her. She talks so well.so I decided to have quality time on my journey.

I sat down just in time waiter came by, I called him to notify I am in this compartment.

The waiter handed me and it was unbearably hot and I spilled some. The old lady rushed with her hankie and wiped the stain. I was surprised. The hankie looked expensive initialled E. she was wiping and I could not stand that.

“Miss, you need not do that, hand me a tissue”

“Are you alright, did it burn your skin”

I was pleased “I am superfine”. She sat back slowly. I could witness knee pain troubling her. I was wondering how swiftly she came to my aid.

Waiter returned now, after the coffee spilled, apologized and handed me tissues.

There was a brief silence. I watched the old women. She wore a kimono of violet and pink in velvet. Too hot for this summer. These kind of clothes only rich don’t mind wearing in summer as they are always in a refrigerated place in my observation. She was comfortable and looking out through the windows.

The small boy came in. He glanced me and then called Cinera.

She was hiding behind the hand bar and she nodded her head. He gave a stern look with his puppy face and she came in with heads drooping. Both were standing. The boy looked at me.

“I am sorry on behalf of my sister”

I expressed tenderness “It’s ok kiddo”. I was actually over whelmed by his maturity. I asked his name. He said that his parents have advised not to tell names to strangers.

“Roshan” his little sister shouted. He gave her a look. I was laughing now. I told her “Follow your brothers’ advice. He loves you so much”

She gave a naughty expression in her face. I searched my pocket gave them two chocolates. Roshan was quick enough to neglect that politely. I reasoned that their parents would have advised on getting food from strangers. Cinera was seeing the chocolate longingly I felt poor for the kid.

I remembered that I had a keychain sort of some doll, I went up my compartment and gave it to her. She happily accepted. Though Roshan remained somewhat aloof. I told that it was perfectly fine that you are on guard for yourself and your sister and I admire you.

He smiled for the first time and we bid all formal good byes.

In the whole scenario I forgot the old lady, Now she was sobbing terribly. I was shocked. I didn’t know what to do. I handed her the tissues I had.

She asked me to take a small iPod that was present in her luggage placed under seat. I took it out. She played a song sung by some little boy or that’s what it sounded like.

Song:

The setting sun hides its light in the night. The night sky can be bright and dark. If u ask it, About the darkness before dawn. It will tell you that’s just a part of tomorrow.?!

She wiped her tears and looked a little better. I asked her.

“A ginger tea or a cup of milk?” she denied.

“I shall go back to my compartment, feel free and call me when you are fine”

She was out of words. Held my hand and gestured me towards the seat. I sat down uncomfortably. To be honest it was the longest silence in my life.

“This small boy reminded me of my brother, he was my everything. He was my treasure; do you want to know what made me cry?”

Desperately yes, I thought. I could not make a head or tail out of it. she gave a faint smile

“Here we go”.

My parents died at young age. We were wealthy enough but very small children. My brother was 15 and I was 8 so our solicitor found a distant aunt and uncle to live with. They were kind enough. Only after our solicitor left, we saw their true faces. They had two children. Aunt Claire prohibited us to go to school. My brother pleaded that at least they could send me to school. They accepted under one condition that my brother should work as a bartender in their bar. He was working all day. I went to school came back and did chores for aunt Claire’s other two children.it was a hell but still I treasure those days with my brother. We managed to have good time somehow. We had a lake nearby. He would take me there for fishing and tell me stories. I never missed mom and dad when I was with him

One fine day the weather was rainy, a salubrious weather. I came down the house to check on my brother. He was happy told me we could play as rain has come no customers will come.

We decided to play our favourite game.in this game the participants should run far as they can and never turn back. If they turn back and found the participant behind him. He loses. We started the game. I ran as fast as I can. In the main road, I was pushed down by someone, I heard a thump sound behind me and by sound it was a horse. I ran again so that I don’t lose the game. Later I got tired. I started to search my brother. I was in a market and people were crowded at a place. I went there to peep in and i saw my brother lying. I asked an old fellow what happened. He told in order to save a girl he pushed himself to a horse and people don’t know whose child he is. My head was spinning. I went and cried near him. He was dead. Poor old lady continued with a shrill in her voice. I was done with two tissues by now.

“This song I heard is one we recorded in station those days in tape, I was protecting it and after the modern technologies arrived, I copied it to iPod and take wherever I go, this reminds me of the good old times and gives me hope” she held the iPod close to her heart.

I had no words to soothe her. Her pain was terrible when compared to what I have went through. I reflected that HOW SHE OVERCAME THE GUILT FEEL over the possibilities of avoiding her brother’s death. Like if she hadn’t called her brother for game or at least she could have turned back when she heard the horse falling down. She answered like she read my mind.

“I know these things I said, would hit you differently, but things cannot be changed, especially your past, learn to accept that few things are out of control. If I had only done like this in past, it would be better, you might think but remember you would have no idea on future. Follow your inner heart that’s all we can do”

“everyone’s problems are unique, pain that each person experiences cannot be compared to others. Respect your problems allow yourself to worry and overcome it. Just because it’s not the saddest problem in earth doesn’t mean you have to be grateful to whatever happens to you”

This past of her has affected me terribly. It was time for dinner. Thomas asked if I would like to join them. I said that I am not hungry. As he persisted, I asked him to get a glass of milk when he returns.

I was now alone. I allowed my mind to wander. I let myself cry. Time passed by. I felt better and even stronger I would say. I heard sounds of Cerene crying and went to take a look. Her parents want her to sleep then go for their dinner. She was resisting that she should get down. After calling by name, I addressed their parents she thanked me for the gift.

Her parents were shocked at a sudden stranger being friends with their child. I explained the situation. The young couple laughed and told that they knew Cerene did some mischief to me but never guessed it was this bad. This cheerful couple were Adolf-Zara.

After formal introduction, Adolf said that Roshan was always way to matured for his age. But he was exactly a brother that Cerene needs.

I said that I would be happy to take care of Cerene until they have dinner. After lot of persuading from my side. They left for dinner.

I read stories to Cerene; All I could see was her non sleepy big egg like eyes. And her questions were really unanswerable, I was getting tired, I wondered how her family managed to put up with her. The train was stationed. It was 8.56pm. Cerene asked that if I could take her for a small walk. She promised that she won’t utter a word to her parents to save me. I laughed “Of course Cerene, you shouldn’t lie to your parents, if not you I would say to them”

“Then do you accept, to take me for a walk” she said with her big bright eyes shining.

It seemed impossible to turndown this cute little pie’s request. while I was thinking, Cerene in a misery tone

 “Why is everyone in this world is strict like my big brother?” She let out a cute expression like sobbing.

“All right!” I said, I was done. I saw in the LED station chart that the train would leave by 10.15pm. That’s a lot of time for a small walk

We got down. She was holding my hand tightly. It was soft small hands. I held it without pressurising it.

Beauty of the child

We walked. It looked like; the sun has broken itself to million magic pieces. I was there watching her eyes, shining with reflection of sky. Having million reasons not to look at the starry night, I watched the moon smiling...

she soon began to rub her eyes and was dragging her feet while walking. I took her in my arm. Young lady fell asleep within seconds. I rushed to the compartment, lay her down. Made sure she is covered with blanket on all corners.

Zara returned. “I rushed first because I thought she might annoy you”.

I told she behaved good and I took her for walk to get some air and she slept. Zara was extremely happy. I could see the relief of mother. She can have peaceful night Afterall. And hope I can have some peace too.

MORNING 5.00AM

Next morning, I woke up, I did not feel the laziness in past life, where I was sticking to bed unwilling to get up. I sprang up to freshen. I thought of wearing some makeup. One day before, I was a stranger but not now, things are changing. I am getting friends and some might continue for life long. My skin is finally breathing and I did not want to ruin up now. I wore my comfy green tees and pink pants. I remembered Ryan’s compliment; you smell like mint. I sprayed a jasmine perfume that Thomas gifted when I gave him a pair of shoes that I have bought for myself in case I need to walk long distance. Thomas told he prepared the perfume by himself, with organic jasmines from his farm. I could visualize the farm full of jasmine before my eyes. I came out near the door with laptop. It was Ryan. I did not expect anyone this early in morning it was just 5 min passed 5.

I opened my mouth to greet him. he asked “May I know your good name”

“Kylie”

“Kylie, can you help me with some document searching?”

I sat beside him and nodded my head. He handed his laptop and asked me to find any name called Emma foster. I assumed that he was doing that job and he passed it to me. Then is he going to relax now? I pondered. but never mind I have decided to help, then let me do that full heartedly.

I went through the documents it had 1,00,000 names. It was hardcopy scanned document, so we cannot search by words. After 10 minutes. I looked Ryan. He was concentrating the document in his phone.

 I told “I can look in phone. Take your laptop”. He neglected and was seriously looking at his phone. I once thought, he didn’t hear me. When I was about to repeat, what I have just said.

He replied “beautiful eyes cannot be spoiled”. My heart warmed but I  was looking at laptop as I never heard anything he said.

We both searched vigorously and completed almost 50,000 documents approximately.

My eyes were getting sore, he got the laptop from me and asked me to rest.

I accepted as I could no longer concentrate yet I want to help him very much.

I said that I want to ask the question that we bet on yesterday.

“’Go ahead” he said shook his head

“Where are you from, why are you travelling?”

He asked “Do you want to know why I asked you to search this name”

“I am quite brilliant but I don’t know about everything that’s happening”

“Ah, I see, let me give you some insight about myself” he could answer the question in a sentence but thank God he didn’t.

It was my 23rd birthday. After the party was over at night my father came by me and shared the truth about me. We were a very good family. My father was in navy and my mom a home maker. I had 3 sisters two brothers.it was a family that you would never be bored of.

“I would!!?” I asked in a different tone.

“Oh man, why do take everything I say as a cliché, I would better be careful” I chuckled.

Back to narration.

On my birthday, my father said that I wasn’t his child by birth. He was least concerned about it and was never willing to share, but it was my mom told him that I had the right to know about myself. what had happened was… (it was a flashback inside the flashback)

September 11 1991, I was found in the ship my father allotted to renovate. He told that after all passengers left by, I was sitting on a trunk looking at the moon. When he asked me, I said I was hungry and he took me home served me meal. For next few days, he was searching details about me. All he knew was…

“Was??” I urged

“I travelled with a lady and whose whereabout was unknown by then “

“And now?”

“Well, by investigation of trunk I had, I know I need to find Emma foster”

“A letter or something “I asked

“Sort of, I actually found that long ago but my mother was afraid to send me. She thought she would lose me.”

I related it with the phone conversation he had while getting the ticket.

“You can take a look at trunk if you want, it’s besides the left side of my luggage in upper berth”

I got up.

I heard Thomas voice “Oh dear, I was searching you everywhere”

“Let’s eat breakfast together, Rebecca has asked about your where abouts million times and you are here with this young man”

Ryan seemed to be proud at this notice. There was a silence.

“Grandpa, this is Ryan, my friend, let go eat breakfast” Poor Rebecca she is diabetic patient. I can’t make her starve I thought.

Thomas said “Let’s call your friend too, join us Ryan”. Ryan was happy at the invitation and at once joined with us.

While we were moving to the dinner car. He whispered behind my ears. “How do you know my name?”. I myself wasn’t clear how, then it strike through, the telephonic conversation. I didn’t know how to manage. I was just blinking. And we sat for breakfast. It was Lamingtons and iced VoVo.

Iced VoVo has been my favourite in Australia. The wheat-flour biscuit with a strip of pink fondant on either side of raspberry jam and sprinkled with coconut is a sweet, soft and crunchy mouthful. 

Rebacca and Thomas on one side, we sat opposite.

Ryan replied “Its fine, I will forgive you”. I was like what…

Rebacca saved Ryan, she was asking where he was from and spoke about his home town. Rebacca had some distant relative from the same place. They talked about that. Though it was sort of boring, as I couldn’t make head or tail out of it. I was sort of liking Ryan’s company. The way he speaks to elders not too much respect or not showing that he is a young boy. He made them comfortable talking to their wavelength. He spoke about organic farming and Thomas was filling with many ideas. We were sitting there for long time after breakfast. At one point, I was even jealous of Ryan, of the attention he got from Thomas and Rebecca, but then I was reminded of my past life, where I was constantly running away from attention and instantly felt comfortable.

After breakfast I decided to check on Isabella. Poor lady, I have developed a soft corner for her.

I went to her compartment; she was hearing the song from her iPod. Those lines, especially after hearing her flash back gave me goosebumps. I thought she needed her own space and was moving when accidently I stepped on the luggage which almost tripped me off.

Ryan who came behind me panicked for a moment. Asked if I am Oki, I nodded. The miss noticed me and asked me to take a seat. She was still hearing the song. I watched her. Her hair though short had a perfect shine. She must have been a beauty when she was young. I assumed.

After finished her song, she turned to me. I complimented her hair.

Curiously, I asked if she cut her hair for sales. She laughed and said she would never do that for money. Then with a sadness in her face. She told me.

After my brother died, I was psychologically hurt to a larger extent, I once wanted to end my time. But I know that he would never have liked that. I took my scissors went before mirror and cut my hair as short as I can like boy’s summer cut. I smiled at mirror. He smiled back at me.

At once horror filled my brain, I thought its some ghost or something. I realized that they were twins.

“twins?”

“Yes, after that I never liked to grow my hair long and I never see mirror unless I wanted to see him”

I was taken aback by her love.

I want this sad phase to end. I asked her to speak about her writings. Her eyes widened and she told me like a child.

“When I share something, people find it amusing even cinematic and gave me magic pen. The pen writes my wildest dreams and emotions in appropriate words. Giving peace to me and relatability to my readers.”

After brief conversation about her young life. I came back to my compartment. While I saw these techy youngsters. There were three boys and two girls. Even with this naked eye, I could see the fight between them. Each of them confined to each corner. Hastily working together. I felt sorry for them. People can’t waste their best phase of their life in silly ego clashes. Never once I faced egoistic people in this train. I found people here so lovely. They were generously kind. It felt like, this was the best journey I ever had in my life. Tomorrow morning these all would end. My stomach twitched at the thought. But I knew that is life.

When the evening came by, I was playing with Cerene and Roshan. I had a good time.

I FEEL ENTHUSIASTIC, BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN WITH THEM... WE TALK THINGS IN THEIR OWN CHILD LANGUAGE AND IT SEEMS LIKE, I HAVE FORGOTTEN MY LANGUAGE. FIGHTS, LAUGHTER, CRYING IN EVERY THING THEY SEEM TO BE AN ADVANCED VERSION OF ME... I TOOK THEIR HANDS IN MINE... I THOUGHT I WAS DIRECTING THEM. BUT I REALISE THAT THEY WERE THE ONE’S WHO IS GUIDING ME...

When I returned to the compartment, there was darkness in Rebecca and Thomas face. Wondering what happened. I asked them.

My phone has rung and Thomas attended to tell that I will call back later. It seems to be my secretary, worrying about my whereabouts leaving the business enterprise with her. Thomas had cut the phone call. Thinking it might hurt me somehow. And here I am facing two gloomy faces of Thomas and Rebecca.

“Did you run away from your home child?” she asked with sorrow in her voice. I sat by her knees and held her hand I told I will make everything clear.

“I am originally from France. I lived in le Havre near Belgium borders of france. The person who called is my secretary”

“Do you run chocolate industry” asked Rebecca. I secretly admired her innocence.

“No grandma, I owned a cosmetic company.”

“Do you know what impact it will have in your parents”

“I don’t know about my dad’s whereabouts since I was born, my mom was raising myself and my sister independently, their careers demanded them to go to different cities. I wished to wander around the world. I had a kind neighbourhood auntie. She looks like the old miss in 1st compartment. I accompanied her during the last days of her life. she had always wanted to be a model, so she would ask me to makeup. she used to get allergies for quite many products so I studied on her skin type and made products at home. I was able to make her smile in her last days of her life. She died and that was huge blow in my life. In remembrance of her, I started this organization named feather touch.it was a huge success. Then the market became heavily competed and I was quite famous. I had fans club. I couldn’t go outside because of safety. The life of elite was too tough, I had to wear makeup all time. I had to show variations in costumes. of course, I can’t wear costumes of my choice, I wear sponsored ones. I was restricted at every move. I was forced on a lifelong diet. I missed every flavour of life. I actually decided to take a vacation considering it would make things right but I knew I had only one life. I did not want any money or fame; it was a quick decision. I knew convincing people around me would take time. People will look me, as if I am mad to leave a good elite life. I have had enough of all this. I came out from my apartment threw the sim, removed my makeup, purchased necessaries and got in the train”

Both were shocked to a greater extent. “I didn’t know, we were travelling with the business tycoon,” said Thomas.

“The word itself made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want my past life to intrude with this new peaceful present. Yet this happening, ruined my peace. I started sobbing.

Rebecca took me in her arm “we would not reveal your identity child, know what your past doesn’t seem real at all, its fake, it looks like a bad dream, the good ones are yet to come”

Thomas gave me tissues. After that everything was bliss.

I went to check on Ryan.

He walks on my right side.

It's not like he is walking with me

We are still strangers

People are talking

Everything is blur.

With only him in my focus like the portrait mode in camera.

I see him. He also feels the same...

I could tell you

I don't know why

He takes my hand and holds it.

Everyone is there

But no one notices.

I feel rush of tears in my eyes. It's not like I am happy I am emotional

We are walking. He exactly feels what I feel

And the point comes

Where we have to leave our hands

Letting go... is the toughest... But still I had no other go...

He looks at my eyes

I woke up!?

When I went to check on him. He was nowhere to be found. I made my bed lay down. I thought I won’t care. But I was worried. What if he got down the station before I got up? I would never see him again. I slept and this awkward dream woke me up. No, Ryan would never do that. One could see from the eyes of the people if not words.

The train was standing, I got down to see if it was a station, it’s not.

I checked Ryan’s compartment; he was still not there. I felt anxious, I missed him somewhere. I felt bad. I decided to go for a small walk. If it’s going to take time.

I got down, there were people at least 5 standing. They were working on train wheel. It was too dark to see clearly. I recognized the waiter from our compartment.

“Miss, you would better me in the compartment while we fix this issue”, I sort of hate when gentlemen like these prefer ladies to stay away from issues.

“what’s the issue?”

I asked he said, they have never encountered such a problem. “The sensors told the train to stop immediately or it would be danger. We are trying to figure out what the problem is but we don’t know. Our train technician was ill and was admitted one day back.”

I heard a voice behind me “The shop that was google map is closed, we have to find for alternate solutions” that’s Ryan!!

I turned with the smile. He said in a nonchalant manner “you look too bright in this sleepy time”,

I knew he was mentioning that I was happy to see him. Having no energy to act out.

I exclaimed “where have you been? I couldn’t find you in train”.

“I was in, next to your compartment with those young engineering people”. Idea splashed me through.

Given no options, I said that these people might be of some help to the issue.

Waiter was resistive but Ryan supported. “You have something in that little brain of yours”

While I was with them, they were working on a automobile projects, it might be of some help”

“I will call them” Ryan said and dialled in his mobile.

Within 5 mins the whole team was here. I learnt their names quickly. The team lead name is Michael and there was a talkative yet informative girl moana. The guy whom I have seen fighting before was Ziro. Other people where charlotte and Oliver.

They have brought a big bright lamp which I have seen they have used it to work at night.

Michael asked from which sensor did they encounter the problem.

“From the wheels”

Moana kneeled down near the wheels. After few minutes of analysis.

“It’s the rail wear” she ascertained.

“Wear occurs due to interaction of rail and wheel. It includes abrasive wear and adhesive wear.

Jendel defined the concept of mild and severe wear. Mild wear takes place slowly.”

Oliver said “Mild wear is observed at the wheel tread and rail crown. Here the wheel tread is the victim”

I did not understand much. I asked if there is any solution.

Ryan had googled in the meantime “lubrication” he said

“Lubrication is quite expensive but if not done properly, we need to replace the entire compartment which is far more costly. Old days they used to lubricate manually. Nowadays we have automatic lubrication systems in train.” Ryan finished.

“There is lubricating device attached here” Ziro showed the light upon it.

“Weather conditions are of particular concern to these lubricators. The applicator nozzles when not used for a long time in summer starts clogging; this leads to improper functioning of the lubrication system. This problem is frequently faced in many parts of Australia, where summers are hot. Lubricators need to be cleaned before the start of winter in cold countries like Sweden as well. This procedure is important as the nozzles of these lubricators may clog in winter due to no lubrication during winter.”

“Where does the lubrication oil come from?” he asked.

The engine drivers explained about that. The conclusion was the oil has been lost due to clogging. There are now two things to be done.

First, we need to fix the clogging. second, we need more lubrication oil to make the train moving.it was 2.35 am and we were not close to any stations.

“What oil is used for lubrication?” I asked

“For lubricant base oil use, the vegetable derived materials are preferred. Common ones include high oleic canola oil, castor oil, palm oil, sunflower seed oil and rapeseed oil from vegetable, and tall oil from tree sources.” Ryan said.

“Though these oils are prepared in factories and have specification for time being hand made oils can be sufficient”

Idea shot up. “Why can’t we get our resources from nearby green areas?”

Waiter told me “Miss, your idea is fanciful, who knows to prepare the oil”

Ah, I knew the answer. “Of course, I have a plan for that Mr.”

Ryan smiled at me.

“Thomas?” he asked.

We went to wake up Thomas and stated the issue didn’t seem to understand much of it, but he said

“I can prepare oil in 30 mins my child. If that’s what you needed let’s get started.”

The whole compartment was lit. Everyone was awake and was willing to do help of any sort.

We gathered and discussed. It was decided that the students would fix the clogging issue and myself Ryan are going to find seeds to make oil. It was 3.03am. Adolf and Zara offered to help so we decided to go in different directions.

Rebecca and Isabella offered to take care of the children. They were sleeping. I was wondering it would be a good story to tell them. They would be excited, so am I.

We took the needed accessories. Pepper spray for wild animals. Wore bug creams to repel insects. Baskets for collecting seeds about which Thomas have gave us a brief lecture about. We were almost ready. We had our phones charged and Michael gave us the frequency emitter. Using which, he set a frequency that we could hear nothing, but that would sound too much for animals so they won’t come near us.

we planed the zones and split up. It was still dark. Yet moon gave us light. we used torches in phone occasionally.

At first, we were silent, I remembered my dream. It seemed like happening. Only that we weren’t holding hands and No one is around us.

“How do you know my name”

“Well, I was around when you were speaking over phone, you seem so curious, I wonder whether your name is to be maintained a secret?”

“No No” his cheeks dimpled. Thank God, he didn’t accuse me eaves dropping.

“Did you take something for your allergies”

“Ah, I forgot, wait!”

My dress got stuck in thorns of the nearby bush, not just one or two it was sharp and small. I was patiently taking them. Ryan kept aside his things and helped me. “You smell of jasmine” he said.

This time, I smiled.

Then I remembered him saying.

“How did you know that I am having allergies?”

“I saw allergy pills in your bag when you were buying tickets in stationed”

I stood for some seconds reflecting. He went ahead. I ran behind him to keep in pace.

“You ought to be careful Kylie, don’t catch up allergies”. His voice was serious and I didn’t know this amusing man could speak like this.

I nodded.

“Did you find Emma foster”

“Not yet”

“I want to take look at your trunk” I said.

“Always welcome “he said.

“Only until tomorrow morning” I said.

I am sure it disturbed him. I saw the time it was 4.05am. The sun was hideous now. We could move on without torches. I sat by the lake; my legs got sore. Ryan took an empty bottle to bring water. From where I sat, I spotted sunflowers. The opposite side of the lake. Ryan came back with a water.

I drank and felt peace. The taste was nowhere near to the filtered water we get in bottles. He sat beside me. I would have rushed up but I need to gain strength in my legs. Sun was raising up. The whole scene was gorgeous. Now again, I made a quick decision.  Now or never. I showed the sunflower to Ryan. He was excited at the finding. I uttered these words

“You stop nowhere, yet my gaze follows you everywhere. When you vanish out of blue, it seems dark and cold. My petals feel droopy but still I was patiently looking out for you. Now comes the day. Its summer and you give the brightest smile from sky. The dew on my petal gives on a new shine.”

“Like a SUNflower” he said. I shrugged my shoulders. We were smiling and got up to work. We collected the seeds. I informed Adolf and Zara. They have collected some seeds to. It seemed Adolf knee was twisted and Zara was almost breathless as she spoke and walked along by supporting his weight. We were walking back

He gave me a sunflower and said “I like you more than you could imagine”

“Ah, very well, now I could imagine” my face glowed differently.

I was feeling free and myself after a long time. I felt like I could even face the worst disaster in the world with Ryan by my side.

I asked Ryan.

“I Thought you always go for beauty.”

“Oh well, do I look like that(laughing). But I fall for gestures, you know.”

“Yeah, I could see that.”

“But I think it’s better if I change my mind. Between you look good. Tbh more than good. “

We reached the place. Thomas rushed to us. Got the seeds and started the process. I thought of helping him. Rebecca said that she would help Thomas and asked me to rest for a while.

Ryan went to Michael and team. They had almost completed the work. They were enjoying the work. Oliver sprayed the water over Ziro using the sprayer they had for working on clogs, Ziro hands were as black coal and he rushed to Oliver in sweet revenge. There was laughter elsewhere. It felt really good.

I saw the time 6.04am.

Isabella was distributing lemonade, that Thomas brought to everyone working there. I helped her to distribute.

Ryan returned. Noone is allowing me to help. Ryan complained. He was sweating like anything. Yet he was radiant. He gulped down the lemonade.

“You wanna see the trunk, come with me then”

I opened the windows and settled down, he handed me the trunk and sat beside me I told

“you smell of mint” he smiled

“Do I?” he gave a peck on my cheek.

I opened the trunk. Inside I found car toys and few books. They were printed in hard paperback and all these books were fairy tales. I opened the book and was swishing through pages.

“Know what I knew every word memorized in my mind, I could even narrate in my sleep” I could feel pain in those words. He badly wanted to know his real parent’s whereabouts.

I turned to the front page.

The boat publications. Below that the author of the book was Emma foster.

“This is why you have been searching this lady”. He gestured a yes. “This is my first move, I knew its vague, I contacted the publications explained my situation and got the authors details they were working with in the publication year dated back 1987”

Something caught my eye. I was stunned and couldn’t utter a word. I closed the trunk. Took Ryan by hand and rushed to doors just as Isabella climbed in.

“Miss, Are you Emma foster?”

She was shocked, then came a yes in mild voice.

I looked at Ryan. He was out of words. It was his turn.

“Do you write fairy tales?”. In the meantime, I brought the trunk to her. There was stifle.

She wept bitterly. I provided her tissues.

“Ryan took her by shoulder and we sat down in a compartment”

“Emma, why didn’t you tell your original name to me?”

I am living in a changed identity child; I am originally from Russia so is Ryan.

“I am so sorry for your loss, Ryan”. Emma unravelled the mystery.

Ryan was born in a wealthy family. He was an only child. During Soviet Union collapse in 1991, Ryan was 4 years old. I was working there, as a governess for him. Ryan’s father was doing underground co-operation with Ukraine, which Yardley, Ryan’s mother has no idea. When there was a miscommunication. They decided to kill the family. Somehow, we knew the news from a local butcher, who was also a part of it. Poor Yardley sacrificed herself to save Ryan’s life. It was me she pleaded to take Ryan to a safe place. Everything went out as planned except for, I didn’t know I was followed. I was working there for more than 10 years with the family, so I am not to be left out. When we landed in Australia, I was sure they will kill me and in order to safe guard Ryan, who was sleeping at the time, I left him in a ship were families aboard. I put the sleeping Ryan over the trunk and left the place. But by grace I was able to live this long time.

She was touching Ryan’s head. God knows how much I worried for this child. Yardley would be happy on seeing you from heaven. She got up to leave.

Ryan was like stone until she left. He broke open. He cried silently. I knew it must be terrible for him. I just let him be. He finally asked

“How did you find this woman was Emma”

“When I opened the pretext page I saw a poem, which she used to hear in her iPod, sung by his brother”

“She told her name was Isabella but once when I saw her hanky it was lettered as E.”

“So, this little brilliant girl saved me my past mystery.” I smiled with a twinkle in my eyes.

“You don’t are about my past huh? you didn’t ask me anything”

“Anything but whatever I said, you treated me as a pervert, if I had asked what’s your past, you would have pushed me from the train”

He was so serious that I was couldn’t help my laughing.

 “Anyways I don’t care what your past is, now that it’s clear that you are mine”

“Nobody said that, I might be married”

“I don’t think so who would leave such a beautiful wife to travel alone”

‘Ah, that’s enough, let’s get back to the work.”

We went out Thomas waved his hands.

We went near. Lubricant was almost done. clogs were cleared. The young team was cleaning their clothes in nearby lake. I could hear their chuckling sounds.

Rebecca came back with a cassette. These audios are recorded while you were young, you can hear your moms and dads voice in there too. Ryan thanked her like anything.

Ryan asked me what I am planning to do when I land in station.

“I think it’s too early to decide”

He said he is planning to get a job there and spend time with Emma to know his parents.

“What is the young man saying?” Thomas asked.

“He wants to know where I will be residing in the town” I said and strolled a few steps

 “If you want, I can offer you to sell my lemonade and jasmine perfume in gold coast”. Thomas shouted and everyone around heard it. I laughed.

“I wish to water and grow plants with you” I shouted back. I ran towards Thomas and Rebecca. They both hugged me. Ryan took a photograph of we 3 of us. With me putting hands over Thomas and Rebecca shoulders. Roshan and Cerene were awake, came running to us like a storm. Roshan slipped off Cerene helped him to get up. I saw Emma, her eyes were shining.

Well, this journey changed my life. I wish this could stay forever but nonetheless destiny is never settled at a place or situation. destiny is always a journey; I will always be travelling.

 

 

I feel strange. This life moves by prediction of what would happen next. It should not be like this. The events must release dopamine if not adrenaline. don’t you think its way to systematic? I hate those plans and their perfection. Shouldn’t you decide things on the go and savor it. Instead of mourning over that the event did not go by the planned way. There is not a single event on earth that has happened exactly as planned. It’s definitely prone to changes. don’t you ever wonder why? I sincerely hope you get the answer soon.

I was waiting in the railway station, glancing my watch from time to time. I was given no choices than to leave on my own. I was kind of relieved that I won’t regret having made this decision as this i only choice left. There were 4 trains till midnight. I had a money that could last for month, given I don’t spend it on any luxuries. I can’t trust anyone I knew as they might report me to old life. Again, I was pleased, that I have no other go, than to live a new life in a new place. I saw the LED station board, it had 4 trains. I saw someone behind me ushering in phone.

“I am alright, can you stop worrying, I am done convincing, give me some peace, respect my decision, will contact you if anything goes wrong, good bye”

That was some young fellow, he got the ticket for the Ghan train.  I googled for more details. It is the largest distance travelling train in Australia about 3000km. I had no idea where to go yet I was sure this train would give me enough time to briefly contemplate my next decision. I got the same ticket. This is the first choice I have made in my new life.

There was a crowd behind me. When I was swiftly taking out the money, I spilled out my allergy pills into bag.

I boarded the train; it was very humid inside. deciding to stand by the door, I got down my berth. As I was walking by, I heard someone gasping. The train blew its horn.  I made my ears sharper. I could hear the wheels rolling and again a gasping sound with a mild voice

 “Here here”. I turned to the compartment.

It was my ticket partner in a worse state. I rushed if I could do something. He pointed the bag. I brought the bag near him; with struggles we found the breather. I was quick enough to powder the tablet. He almost fainted. while he was regaining, I was lost in my thoughts. If it was not for him, I would have boarded different train. Who would have saved him? he was there sitting smiling in gratitude. This time I watched him closely.

He does not look too smart, but had an attitude that would be sought after. His chin was like my idol Aaron deng, I thought he was a brother of him or something like that. This temporary illness could not steal his charm. Not by looks but there was something amusing about him, that I could see in his eyes. I was lost in my world until he gave a slight giggle.

“What you got some panic attack or something?” I realized I was staring and got up to leave.

I expected a thank you. He ushered “Are you travelling alone?”. I am a fool to think that people would not notice me.

 “Not your concern anyway.” I was pretty rude yet it did not affect him at all.

“My friend, it’s not a cliché, I was just asking, you are my life saver, I owe you”. I was processing. Definitely I can’t trust the stranger, yet I have no plans after getting off the train.

“So do me a favor?” I asked. His carriage was empty. He moved his luggage and signaled me to sit in a polite manner.

I continued “I want to know about cities in Australia where I can have job and a peaceful life”. The answer came fast than I have imagined.

“The Gold Coast can be an extremely affordable city to live in. Accommodation rates are generally lower than in capital cities, with rooms in a share house starting from as low as $135 per week in great areas such as Southport and Surfers Paradise.”

“You seem to stick to that; Does it matter a lot to you”

“I thought you need more about the city”

I cursed myself “Continue”.

His face was inexpressive, I felt like I am hearing a radio. It didn’t feel like I am conversing with a human.

“It wasn't long ago the best meals on the Gold Coast came served with batter and chips. Now some of the country's best young chefs are setting up shop, offering more innovative high-end dining options than either Noosa or Byron Bay. Buses operate up and down the Gold Coast Highway, which runs parallel to the coast – but few locals use them.

 There's two Gold Coasts

Comparing the southern Gold Coast to the northern Gold Coast is like comparing two entirely different destinations – don't do it. There's a cultural divide which kicks in”

He was perfectly addressing what I want to know about. Still, I did not let out my grateful expression.

“Is there anything else specifically you want to know?”

“What about climate and its specializations?”

“The city is a major tourist destination with a sunny, subtropical climate and has become widely known for its world-class surfing beaches, high-rise dominated skyline, theme parks, nightlife, and rainforest hinterland.” there was a pause.

There was a cool breeze, train was going through a bridge.

“Is the city safe?” looks like he sensed my anxiety.

“Unless, you step into water I would say you can be safe. The City of Gold Coast Council warned residents to be aware of stingrays, jellyfish, catfish, stonefish and sharks that frequent local lakes and canals.

When it comes to land, I think you are more dangerous for other people”

He was grinning. I was shockingly annoyed

“I think it would be helpful if I push you into the lake and check the facts for me. After all I am your life saver”. I said with a cunning expression.

“Looks like a murderer is on loose” he said scrutinizing me. I got up.

“Thank you for enlightening”.

Looked like he realized he asked the wrong question.

“Anytime! For life saver”.

The voice was already distant as I was walking towards the carriage.

Morning 5.30am

It was that time I noticed my carriage colleagues. There was an old couple.  I found them lovely, instantly. Grandma was sleepy grandpa was giving her tablets and water. She was very slow but he was patiently standing beside despite the train moving violently. After that he went to sleep. Both were asleep. I checked my phone. It was 5. 33am.I had thrown the sim off after I left the apartment and I brought a new sim at the station. I freshened up and we had waiter from dinner car. Not many people were awake. I ordered batter and chips.

It’s not new for me to take sudden impulse decisions. But I wondered why I ordered this. Then I remembered events from yesterday night.

I saw a lady sitting at the corner of the dinner car. Something about her was familiar. Her hair was very short like a gentle man. She had a striking resemblance of a well-wisher in my old life. I came back to reality, when she smiled up at me. I made my way towards her.

“Please take your seat” in a Russian accent.

“So where are you from”. I gazed at her. She looks trustable. But I have met her only now.

“Never mind, tell me how to call you?”

I replied.

“Kylie, your eyes speak before you utter anything” she smiled. I watched her she seemed very peaceful but something was disturbing her.

“You can call me Isabella” she said

Waiter came by “miss, your order is on the way” he turned to the old women. she ordered Pea and ham soup.

We were looking by the window. until I broke the silence. “Shall we talk, if you are willing too”

It looked like I was way too polite. “Anything you want life, love, people, places, war.”

Our dishes arrived. I was hungry. It was afternoon I ate something and had a coffee, while waiting for train, to be precise, while I didn’t know, what train to board in.

She asked me” what did you eat last?”

I mention about the coffee that I had in Starbucks. the name brought smile.

“Do you want to know the story behind it?”. I badly wanted to break the ice between us.

“Please go ahead” I beamed.

“You know them as a successful organization with multiple outlets in every country, quite true.

They did really well in adding new variations, attracting by limited time offers, aesthetically pleasing atmosphere what else a shop needs, but they failed in Australia.

This place has its own culture, we are highly specialized in coffees and the sugar laden cold coffees did suit the place. They are shutting down their outlets at the pace they have opened them.”

They stay where their sugar coffees are sought after, we stay by following our tradition”

“They can’t survive in a place that don’t suit them”

“Yes dear, so it’s better not to force on places that is not meant for them.   In an extreme, I would say, if they are not valued here, they lose their dignity everywhere”

I traced back to my old life. what went wrong there. I was valued too much that I lost my freedom. I was constantly looked upon for variations. If I did not meet up with the brainstorming idea, I met up with pressure until I have one.

I asked her what does she do for living.

“I am a writer. it’s quite a long time but it gave me enough money to live a contended life”

“what do you write?”

“Fables that instil good values” she said with pride.

“I also write for advertisements”

I almost gulped my food without chewing. Does she recognise me and want me to admit myself?  I thought of leaving the place quickly after the meal.

I offered my thanksgiving for her kind companion.

“child, feel free to come to my carriage, I would appreciate someone to hear my tales”

Rushing away I saw asthma boy moving to dinner car. He greeted me. I hurriedly smiled and went to my compartment.

I sat there. The couple staring at my bewildered face. Why does just a glimpse of past make me uncomfortable? I decided not to think more about it.

I looked around. There were 5 compartments in our carriage. The one that’s near to the door was my ticket partners. The second one was a couple and their cute two little children a boy and his young sister. Followed by mine, where the old couple is also present. Next to that we have a gang of youngsters travelling to participate in some events, I guess. The last one was Isabella’s.

There was some yelling happening in nearby compartment. There were 5 people and two of them fighting at high pitch.one guy was coming out of the college as he uttered these words.

“I was doing all the work by myself but you guys had all fun. Now you reason out me for the small mistake I made.”

“Ziro, you definitely did more than us, but it’s the part you done have went wrong and the whole team is suffering”

“you rejoiced when I did extra work, why you didn’t stop me then”. There was a silence. He slammed the seat and went out.

It is this part, the hardest of life. I am an adult who never think that going to youth would bring me happiness. It’s true I did not have responsibility by then but I was bearing lot fake truths in our mind. Not only me, I could see most youngsters in that state. They get too much attached to career or friends or relationship and want things work out in the way exactly how they have calculated. Thats not going to happen. They consider things so seriously. I feel sorry for them. They can be happy only when they stop predicting and accept things as they are. I wish I had grown up earlier and have released myself from that mental cage. Not that age matters, I could still see people in 40s being youngsters in mind. Everyone grows at a point. Noone other than themselves will be aware of it.

That young guy came again took his laptop and went out again. These screens have largely affected and altered the life of these kids.

I checked time. Its 11.24am.it was hot. I was wondering how I am going to survive this noon.

I was wearing cotton linen white shirt and a pink skirt. I purchased clothes before coming to station.as I had only 10 minutes to leave, but I did take something more important apart from my mobile and money.

The old man in my compartment was searching something in his luggage and gave the bottle to his beloved wife. She smiled at him. That looked like mint lemonade. Perfect for summer. Its rude to look what others eat. I turned towards window to make them comfortable. The old man handed me a bottle. “Chill yourself child”

I put a kind smile on my face and politely denied. He kept it near me and sat opposite.

“My daughter loves this so much, its prepared freshly from our farms.do drink and tell us how is it is?”

That’s it, I accepted. I opened the lid, sipped and indulged. It was like what you see in advertisements I felt as if splashed with ice. It soothed my nerves. The lime was very fresh and the mint smell filled the compartment. It was perfect. I felt happy instantly.

Old woman was looking at me. I opened up.

“I like lemonade. It’s this time of year that I like to grab my laptop, head for a cafe with some outdoor space and order up a fresh lemonade or two. There’s just nothing like it!

Every time I go to Le Pain Quotidien I order a mint lemonade. It’s the best, most tart and refreshing lemonade I have ever had and I can’t get enough of it.

But at around $4 for a medium sized glass with a TON of ice in it, it’s just not something I feel like buying every day. It’s just lemonade, right?!”

Gran pa said “Sure, fresh lemon juice, a little sugar, water and fresh mint is an absolutely magical combination. But, dang…

When you buy a drink at a sit-down spot, it’s not just the beverage you’re paying for. It’s the atmosphere, the table-space and the free Wi-Fi that all get factored into the final price.”

“I am impressed by your interpretation”. For the first time I saw his smile, with wrinkles crushing around his eyes.

 “Of course, you like it dear, your eyes widened like you saw a shark in ocean”

I laughed.

“yes grandma, it’s delicious”

“I can share the formula if you want”

“sure!!”

“Lemonade is good for your health honey but that depends on a few factors.”

Lemons are a fantastic source of vitamin C. Lemon pulp is also a great source of pectin, which might help you feel full longer. Over a cup of sugar is used in 95% of the lemonade I came across. That’s almost as much sugar as you’ll find in a can of Coke (and most other soft drinks). Geeeez…”

I was swallowed by her enthusiasm.

At the end of recipe, I told I will definitely try this at home.

At the same time, I was wondering what will be my home.

Grandpa said “and for the atmosphere you are always welcome to our farm”

I imagined a lush green yawn with this old couple spending quality time together. I assured them I would visit once I am settled in the town.

I asked their names-Rebecca and Thomas.

Thomas told “The recipe of lemonade is equally important to the ingredients you use and the love with which you pour into jug. It makes a lemonade a bit extra sweet.”

“Are these prepared from your farm, grandpa?”

“Yes, we prepared it just before we travelled to our daughter’s house, As I said she loves them the most, so we prepared enough for her and her kids to last this summer.”

“Your farm is in gold coast”

“yes, my child, this place has one of the finest soils for farming”.

This coincidence though, I thought.

“Excuse me”, Thomas went out of compartment.

Rebecca looked tired, I asked her if she would like to sleep. “she politely accepted my offer. I helped her laydown. Closed the curtains. She took my hand.

“You remind me of myself when I was young. Remember this sometimes wrong trains take us to the right place”

I once thought, why do I have a feeling that everyone I speak know that, I ran away from my past life. she slept within a minute. I turned off the lights and came out.

It was my ticket partner, talking in phone.

“I have asked for access in all documents stating my reasons”, a pause.

“Yes sir, I am Ryan” a small pause

“Thank you, sir, make sure things are clear in my way”.

I wasn’t intentionally hearing; I was trying to open the door that was stuck. “Life saver, Mind for a small talk”

I contemplated. I wanted to talk but something did not feel right. “No, I am going to get some air, see you later”

Still the handle was fastened. I wondered it was bolted from outside. Ryan came near me and was knocking the door. Thomas opened it.

 “Sorry my dear, I am used to bolt door out of conscious”

“Forgive me my children” he went inside.

 Now the wind was blowing hot air inside the carriage. I went out, splashed the water in my face neck hands. I felt cool instantly. My white cotton top got wet but with this wind it would dry up in no time. I checked the time.it was 12.35pm.

I took my phone and logged out from all my social media accounts. There were at least 100 messages from my secretary. I told her to take any decision on behalf me. I wonder if they filed any complaints about me went missing. Whatever happens there, has no concern over me here. At any cost, I must avoid police and legal checking’s until I get a proper job here.

I sort of like the journey. Thomas and Rebecca have been kind enough. I am intrigued by the Isabella and Ryan though he seems aloof, he is seemingly good.

Ryan came out with binoculars in hand. He moved to the other door, sat down and was watching through binoculars. Whatsoever I try not to notice but this man is definitely different and demanded my attention.

Finally, my curiosity won, “what can you see through it?”

“We are actually travelling near a sanctuary and national park”

He must have checked in map.

“So, you expect to see? kangaroos?”

“Ha, people can’t have kangaroos near tracks, you must think before you speak. Its Tasmanian devil”

Name sounds frightening “what if it gets in train, shall I close the doors”

“They don’t harm you little girl, Tasmanian Devils are aggressive if they feel threatened or are competing for food. They bare teeth, lunge, and emit loud, blood-curdling shrieks in the dark hours that made early settlers imagine demons had surrounded them in the wilderness.”

The train was slowing down for crossing.

“Ah, I spotted it, wanna see it?” he called me with a childlike expression in face.

I was already attracted by that gadget so without hesitation accepted his offer. He handed me the binoculars. It looked like something wildlife survivors would have damn heavy. Though he was bearing some weight with one hand. I looked through. I could spot some monkey like creatures moving from tree to tree.

“Can you see it?”

“Yeah, it looks like they are laughing’

“They are Quokkas are often called “the happiest animal on Earth” because of their big grins and friendly natures. However, it's important to remember that they're still wild animals. They can bite, and they can get aggressive when fighting over mates or when they feel threatened.”

I shuddered and smiled.

“You smell like mint” Ryan said. I put on a grim expression as I was looking through. We passed the quokkas.

He said “Tasmanian devil can sound bad but it’s better than quokkas”. I was wondering if he is mentioning himself as Tasmanian.

“Just because I don’t know animals, I won’t trust whatever you say about them.”

For the first time I was able shock Ryan. “Then check on google, I can bet on it”

I knew I can’t bet. Because I knew he is right. But still enjoying this amusing person. I bet that he can ask a question and I will answer the truth. He said he will also go by the same bet.

Finally, we both won as he stated a small fact wrong. I was hungry so I bid byes ate alone and returned to my compartment.

I decided to have some time alone, I heard songs and read books. Time passed by. Thomas and Rebecca were sleeping.

A young child came by. she asked whether I could go to the doors. I said that’s too dangerous. She told my brother had jumped from the door why not me.

I threw my book in aghast and rushed to the door. Her parents and a little boy were standing. The girl who came behind me. “Thank you, sister, for being kind to open the door for me”. The look on my face was so serious that the little boy went and took hold the hands of his mother.

Without knowing how to react I came to my place; well, I didn’t know kids are so cunning. She could not reach the door and if she had asked normally, we would have hesitated to open the door. “Damn!”. I will teach her a good lesson.

Evening 5.47pm.

I got up to have some coffee. Without caffeine my half of the brain seemed non functionable. I ordered one. They were cleaning the dining car. I decided to go back and asked the waiter to bring it to my place.

Isabella called me to her place. I introspected. In the morning, I was afraid she has identified me but looks of her are harmless. Given the fact even though she says who I am no one would believe her. She talks so well.so I decided to have quality time on my journey.

I sat down just in time waiter came by, I called him to notify I am in this compartment.

The waiter handed me and it was unbearably hot and I spilled some. The old lady rushed with her hankie and wiped the stain. I was surprised. The hankie looked expensive initialled E. she was wiping and I could not stand that.

“Miss, you need not do that, hand me a tissue”

“Are you alright, did it burn your skin”

I was pleased “I am superfine”. She sat back slowly. I could witness knee pain troubling her. I was wondering how swiftly she came to my aid.

Waiter returned now, after the coffee spilled, apologized and handed me tissues.

There was a brief silence. I watched the old women. She wore a kimono of violet and pink in velvet. Too hot for this summer. These kind of clothes only rich don’t mind wearing in summer as they are always in a refrigerated place in my observation. She was comfortable and looking out through the windows.

The small boy came in. He glanced me and then called Cinera.

She was hiding behind the hand bar and she nodded her head. He gave a stern look with his puppy face and she came in with heads drooping. Both were standing. The boy looked at me.

“I am sorry on behalf of my sister”

I expressed tenderness “It’s ok kiddo”. I was actually over whelmed by his maturity. I asked his name. He said that his parents have advised not to tell names to strangers.

“Roshan” his little sister shouted. He gave her a look. I was laughing now. I told her “Follow your brothers’ advice. He loves you so much”

She gave a naughty expression in her face. I searched my pocket gave them two chocolates. Roshan was quick enough to neglect that politely. I reasoned that their parents would have advised on getting food from strangers. Cinera was seeing the chocolate longingly I felt poor for the kid.

I remembered that I had a keychain sort of some doll, I went up my compartment and gave it to her. She happily accepted. Though Roshan remained somewhat aloof. I told that it was perfectly fine that you are on guard for yourself and your sister and I admire you.

He smiled for the first time and we bid all formal good byes.

In the whole scenario I forgot the old lady, Now she was sobbing terribly. I was shocked. I didn’t know what to do. I handed her the tissues I had.

She asked me to take a small iPod that was present in her luggage placed under seat. I took it out. She played a song sung by some little boy or that’s what it sounded like.

Song:

The setting sun hides its light in the night. The night sky can be bright and dark. If u ask it, About the darkness before dawn. It will tell you that’s just a part of tomorrow.?!

She wiped her tears and looked a little better. I asked her.

“A ginger tea or a cup of milk?” she denied.

“I shall go back to my compartment, feel free and call me when you are fine”

She was out of words. Held my hand and gestured me towards the seat. I sat down uncomfortably. To be honest it was the longest silence in my life.

“This small boy reminded me of my brother, he was my everything. He was my treasure; do you want to know what made me cry?”

Desperately yes, I thought. I could not make a head or tail out of it. she gave a faint smile

“Here we go”.

My parents died at young age. We were wealthy enough but very small children. My brother was 15 and I was 8 so our solicitor found a distant aunt and uncle to live with. They were kind enough. Only after our solicitor left, we saw their true faces. They had two children. Aunt Claire prohibited us to go to school. My brother pleaded that at least they could send me to school. They accepted under one condition that my brother should work as a bartender in their bar. He was working all day. I went to school came back and did chores for aunt Claire’s other two children.it was a hell but still I treasure those days with my brother. We managed to have good time somehow. We had a lake nearby. He would take me there for fishing and tell me stories. I never missed mom and dad when I was with him

One fine day the weather was rainy, a salubrious weather. I came down the house to check on my brother. He was happy told me we could play as rain has come no customers will come.

We decided to play our favourite game.in this game the participants should run far as they can and never turn back. If they turn back and found the participant behind him. He loses. We started the game. I ran as fast as I can. In the main road, I was pushed down by someone, I heard a thump sound behind me and by sound it was a horse. I ran again so that I don’t lose the game. Later I got tired. I started to search my brother. I was in a market and people were crowded at a place. I went there to peep in and i saw my brother lying. I asked an old fellow what happened. He told in order to save a girl he pushed himself to a horse and people don’t know whose child he is. My head was spinning. I went and cried near him. He was dead. Poor old lady continued with a shrill in her voice. I was done with two tissues by now.

“This song I heard is one we recorded in station those days in tape, I was protecting it and after the modern technologies arrived, I copied it to iPod and take wherever I go, this reminds me of the good old times and gives me hope” she held the iPod close to her heart.

I had no words to soothe her. Her pain was terrible when compared to what I have went through. I reflected that HOW SHE OVERCAME THE GUILT FEEL over the possibilities of avoiding her brother’s death. Like if she hadn’t called her brother for game or at least she could have turned back when she heard the horse falling down. She answered like she read my mind.

“I know these things I said, would hit you differently, but things cannot be changed, especially your past, learn to accept that few things are out of control. If I had only done like this in past, it would be better, you might think but remember you would have no idea on future. Follow your inner heart that’s all we can do”

“everyone’s problems are unique, pain that each person experiences cannot be compared to others. Respect your problems allow yourself to worry and overcome it. Just because it’s not the saddest problem in earth doesn’t mean you have to be grateful to whatever happens to you”

This past of her has affected me terribly. It was time for dinner. Thomas asked if I would like to join them. I said that I am not hungry. As he persisted, I asked him to get a glass of milk when he returns.

I was now alone. I allowed my mind to wander. I let myself cry. Time passed by. I felt better and even stronger I would say. I heard sounds of Cerene crying and went to take a look. Her parents want her to sleep then go for their dinner. She was resisting that she should get down. After calling by name, I addressed their parents she thanked me for the gift.

Her parents were shocked at a sudden stranger being friends with their child. I explained the situation. The young couple laughed and told that they knew Cerene did some mischief to me but never guessed it was this bad. This cheerful couple were Adolf-Zara.

After formal introduction, Adolf said that Roshan was always way to matured for his age. But he was exactly a brother that Cerene needs.

I said that I would be happy to take care of Cerene until they have dinner. After lot of persuading from my side. They left for dinner.

I read stories to Cerene; All I could see was her non sleepy big egg like eyes. And her questions were really unanswerable, I was getting tired, I wondered how her family managed to put up with her. The train was stationed. It was 8.56pm. Cerene asked that if I could take her for a small walk. She promised that she won’t utter a word to her parents to save me. I laughed “Of course Cerene, you shouldn’t lie to your parents, if not you I would say to them”

“Then do you accept, to take me for a walk” she said with her big bright eyes shining.

It seemed impossible to turndown this cute little pie’s request. while I was thinking, Cerene in a misery tone

 “Why is everyone in this world is strict like my big brother?” She let out a cute expression like sobbing.

“All right!” I said, I was done. I saw in the LED station chart that the train would leave by 10.15pm. That’s a lot of time for a small walk

We got down. She was holding my hand tightly. It was soft small hands. I held it without pressurising it.

Beauty of the child

We walked. It looked like; the sun has broken itself to million magic pieces. I was there watching her eyes, shining with reflection of sky. Having million reasons not to look at the starry night, I watched the moon smiling...

she soon began to rub her eyes and was dragging her feet while walking. I took her in my arm. Young lady fell asleep within seconds. I rushed to the compartment, lay her down. Made sure she is covered with blanket on all corners.

Zara returned. “I rushed first because I thought she might annoy you”.

I told she behaved good and I took her for walk to get some air and she slept. Zara was extremely happy. I could see the relief of mother. She can have peaceful night Afterall. And hope I can have some peace too.

MORNING 5.00AM

Next morning, I woke up, I did not feel the laziness in past life, where I was sticking to bed unwilling to get up. I sprang up to freshen. I thought of wearing some makeup. One day before, I was a stranger but not now, things are changing. I am getting friends and some might continue for life long. My skin is finally breathing and I did not want to ruin up now. I wore my comfy green tees and pink pants. I remembered Ryan’s compliment; you smell like mint. I sprayed a jasmine perfume that Thomas gifted when I gave him a pair of shoes that I have bought for myself in case I need to walk long distance. Thomas told he prepared the perfume by himself, with organic jasmines from his farm. I could visualize the farm full of jasmine before my eyes. I came out near the door with laptop. It was Ryan. I did not expect anyone this early in morning it was just 5 min passed 5.

I opened my mouth to greet him. he asked “May I know your good name”

“Kylie”

“Kylie, can you help me with some document searching?”

I sat beside him and nodded my head. He handed his laptop and asked me to find any name called Emma foster. I assumed that he was doing that job and he passed it to me. Then is he going to relax now? I pondered. but never mind I have decided to help, then let me do that full heartedly.

I went through the documents it had 1,00,000 names. It was hardcopy scanned document, so we cannot search by words. After 10 minutes. I looked Ryan. He was concentrating the document in his phone.

 I told “I can look in phone. Take your laptop”. He neglected and was seriously looking at his phone. I once thought, he didn’t hear me. When I was about to repeat, what I have just said.

He replied “beautiful eyes cannot be spoiled”. My heart warmed but I  was looking at laptop as I never heard anything he said.

We both searched vigorously and completed almost 50,000 documents approximately.

My eyes were getting sore, he got the laptop from me and asked me to rest.

I accepted as I could no longer concentrate yet I want to help him very much.

I said that I want to ask the question that we bet on yesterday.

“’Go ahead” he said shook his head

“Where are you from, why are you travelling?”

He asked “Do you want to know why I asked you to search this name”

“I am quite brilliant but I don’t know about everything that’s happening”

“Ah, I see, let me give you some insight about myself” he could answer the question in a sentence but thank God he didn’t.

It was my 23rd birthday. After the party was over at night my father came by me and shared the truth about me. We were a very good family. My father was in navy and my mom a home maker. I had 3 sisters two brothers.it was a family that you would never be bored of.

“I would!!?” I asked in a different tone.

“Oh man, why do take everything I say as a cliché, I would better be careful” I chuckled.

Back to narration.

On my birthday, my father said that I wasn’t his child by birth. He was least concerned about it and was never willing to share, but it was my mom told him that I had the right to know about myself. what had happened was… (it was a flashback inside the flashback)

September 11 1991, I was found in the ship my father allotted to renovate. He told that after all passengers left by, I was sitting on a trunk looking at the moon. When he asked me, I said I was hungry and he took me home served me meal. For next few days, he was searching details about me. All he knew was…

“Was??” I urged

“I travelled with a lady and whose whereabout was unknown by then “

“And now?”

“Well, by investigation of trunk I had, I know I need to find Emma foster”

“A letter or something “I asked

“Sort of, I actually found that long ago but my mother was afraid to send me. She thought she would lose me.”

I related it with the phone conversation he had while getting the ticket.

“You can take a look at trunk if you want, it’s besides the left side of my luggage in upper berth”

I got up.

I heard Thomas voice “Oh dear, I was searching you everywhere”

“Let’s eat breakfast together, Rebecca has asked about your where abouts million times and you are here with this young man”

Ryan seemed to be proud at this notice. There was a silence.

“Grandpa, this is Ryan, my friend, let go eat breakfast” Poor Rebecca she is diabetic patient. I can’t make her starve I thought.

Thomas said “Let’s call your friend too, join us Ryan”. Ryan was happy at the invitation and at once joined with us.

While we were moving to the dinner car. He whispered behind my ears. “How do you know my name?”. I myself wasn’t clear how, then it strike through, the telephonic conversation. I didn’t know how to manage. I was just blinking. And we sat for breakfast. It was Lamingtons and iced VoVo.

Iced VoVo has been my favourite in Australia. The wheat-flour biscuit with a strip of pink fondant on either side of raspberry jam and sprinkled with coconut is a sweet, soft and crunchy mouthful. 

Rebacca and Thomas on one side, we sat opposite.

Ryan replied “Its fine, I will forgive you”. I was like what…

Rebacca saved Ryan, she was asking where he was from and spoke about his home town. Rebacca had some distant relative from the same place. They talked about that. Though it was sort of boring, as I couldn’t make head or tail out of it. I was sort of liking Ryan’s company. The way he speaks to elders not too much respect or not showing that he is a young boy. He made them comfortable talking to their wavelength. He spoke about organic farming and Thomas was filling with many ideas. We were sitting there for long time after breakfast. At one point, I was even jealous of Ryan, of the attention he got from Thomas and Rebecca, but then I was reminded of my past life, where I was constantly running away from attention and instantly felt comfortable.

After breakfast I decided to check on Isabella. Poor lady, I have developed a soft corner for her.

I went to her compartment; she was hearing the song from her iPod. Those lines, especially after hearing her flash back gave me goosebumps. I thought she needed her own space and was moving when accidently I stepped on the luggage which almost tripped me off.

Ryan who came behind me panicked for a moment. Asked if I am Oki, I nodded. The miss noticed me and asked me to take a seat. She was still hearing the song. I watched her. Her hair though short had a perfect shine. She must have been a beauty when she was young. I assumed.

After finished her song, she turned to me. I complimented her hair.

Curiously, I asked if she cut her hair for sales. She laughed and said she would never do that for money. Then with a sadness in her face. She told me.

After my brother died, I was psychologically hurt to a larger extent, I once wanted to end my time. But I know that he would never have liked that. I took my scissors went before mirror and cut my hair as short as I can like boy’s summer cut. I smiled at mirror. He smiled back at me.

At once horror filled my brain, I thought its some ghost or something. I realized that they were twins.

“twins?”

“Yes, after that I never liked to grow my hair long and I never see mirror unless I wanted to see him”

I was taken aback by her love.

I want this sad phase to end. I asked her to speak about her writings. Her eyes widened and she told me like a child.

“When I share something, people find it amusing even cinematic and gave me magic pen. The pen writes my wildest dreams and emotions in appropriate words. Giving peace to me and relatability to my readers.”

After brief conversation about her young life. I came back to my compartment. While I saw these techy youngsters. There were three boys and two girls. Even with this naked eye, I could see the fight between them. Each of them confined to each corner. Hastily working together. I felt sorry for them. People can’t waste their best phase of their life in silly ego clashes. Never once I faced egoistic people in this train. I found people here so lovely. They were generously kind. It felt like, this was the best journey I ever had in my life. Tomorrow morning these all would end. My stomach twitched at the thought. But I knew that is life.

When the evening came by, I was playing with Cerene and Roshan. I had a good time.

I FEEL ENTHUSIASTIC, BECOMING A CHILD AGAIN WITH THEM... WE TALK THINGS IN THEIR OWN CHILD LANGUAGE AND IT SEEMS LIKE, I HAVE FORGOTTEN MY LANGUAGE. FIGHTS, LAUGHTER, CRYING IN EVERY THING THEY SEEM TO BE AN ADVANCED VERSION OF ME... I TOOK THEIR HANDS IN MINE... I THOUGHT I WAS DIRECTING THEM. BUT I REALISE THAT THEY WERE THE ONE’S WHO IS GUIDING ME...

When I returned to the compartment, there was darkness in Rebecca and Thomas face. Wondering what happened. I asked them.

My phone has rung and Thomas attended to tell that I will call back later. It seems to be my secretary, worrying about my whereabouts leaving the business enterprise with her. Thomas had cut the phone call. Thinking it might hurt me somehow. And here I am facing two gloomy faces of Thomas and Rebecca.

“Did you run away from your home child?” she asked with sorrow in her voice. I sat by her knees and held her hand I told I will make everything clear.

“I am originally from France. I lived in le Havre near Belgium borders of france. The person who called is my secretary”

“Do you run chocolate industry” asked Rebecca. I secretly admired her innocence.

“No grandma, I owned a cosmetic company.”

“Do you know what impact it will have in your parents”

“I don’t know about my dad’s whereabouts since I was born, my mom was raising myself and my sister independently, their careers demanded them to go to different cities. I wished to wander around the world. I had a kind neighbourhood auntie. She looks like the old miss in 1st compartment. I accompanied her during the last days of her life. she had always wanted to be a model, so she would ask me to makeup. she used to get allergies for quite many products so I studied on her skin type and made products at home. I was able to make her smile in her last days of her life. She died and that was huge blow in my life. In remembrance of her, I started this organization named feather touch.it was a huge success. Then the market became heavily competed and I was quite famous. I had fans club. I couldn’t go outside because of safety. The life of elite was too tough, I had to wear makeup all time. I had to show variations in costumes. of course, I can’t wear costumes of my choice, I wear sponsored ones. I was restricted at every move. I was forced on a lifelong diet. I missed every flavour of life. I actually decided to take a vacation considering it would make things right but I knew I had only one life. I did not want any money or fame; it was a quick decision. I knew convincing people around me would take time. People will look me, as if I am mad to leave a good elite life. I have had enough of all this. I came out from my apartment threw the sim, removed my makeup, purchased necessaries and got in the train”

Both were shocked to a greater extent. “I didn’t know, we were travelling with the business tycoon,” said Thomas.

“The word itself made me uncomfortable. I didn’t want my past life to intrude with this new peaceful present. Yet this happening, ruined my peace. I started sobbing.

Rebecca took me in her arm “we would not reveal your identity child, know what your past doesn’t seem real at all, its fake, it looks like a bad dream, the good ones are yet to come”

Thomas gave me tissues. After that everything was bliss.

I went to check on Ryan.

He walks on my right side.

It's not like he is walking with me

We are still strangers

People are talking

Everything is blur.

With only him in my focus like the portrait mode in camera.

I see him. He also feels the same...

I could tell you

I don't know why

He takes my hand and holds it.

Everyone is there

But no one notices.

I feel rush of tears in my eyes. It's not like I am happy I am emotional

We are walking. He exactly feels what I feel

And the point comes

Where we have to leave our hands

Letting go... is the toughest... But still I had no other go...

He looks at my eyes

I woke up!?

When I went to check on him. He was nowhere to be found. I made my bed lay down. I thought I won’t care. But I was worried. What if he got down the station before I got up? I would never see him again. I slept and this awkward dream woke me up. No, Ryan would never do that. One could see from the eyes of the people if not words.

The train was standing, I got down to see if it was a station, it’s not.

I checked Ryan’s compartment; he was still not there. I felt anxious, I missed him somewhere. I felt bad. I decided to go for a small walk. If it’s going to take time.

I got down, there were people at least 5 standing. They were working on train wheel. It was too dark to see clearly. I recognized the waiter from our compartment.

“Miss, you would better me in the compartment while we fix this issue”, I sort of hate when gentlemen like these prefer ladies to stay away from issues.

“what’s the issue?”

I asked he said, they have never encountered such a problem. “The sensors told the train to stop immediately or it would be danger. We are trying to figure out what the problem is but we don’t know. Our train technician was ill and was admitted one day back.”

I heard a voice behind me “The shop that was google map is closed, we have to find for alternate solutions” that’s Ryan!!

I turned with the smile. He said in a nonchalant manner “you look too bright in this sleepy time”,

I knew he was mentioning that I was happy to see him. Having no energy to act out.

I exclaimed “where have you been? I couldn’t find you in train”.

“I was in, next to your compartment with those young engineering people”. Idea splashed me through.

Given no options, I said that these people might be of some help to the issue.

Waiter was resistive but Ryan supported. “You have something in that little brain of yours”

While I was with them, they were working on a automobile projects, it might be of some help”

“I will call them” Ryan said and dialled in his mobile.

Within 5 mins the whole team was here. I learnt their names quickly. The team lead name is Michael and there was a talkative yet informative girl moana. The guy whom I have seen fighting before was Ziro. Other people where charlotte and Oliver.

They have brought a big bright lamp which I have seen they have used it to work at night.

Michael asked from which sensor did they encounter the problem.

“From the wheels”

Moana kneeled down near the wheels. After few minutes of analysis.

“It’s the rail wear” she ascertained.

“Wear occurs due to interaction of rail and wheel. It includes abrasive wear and adhesive wear.

Jendel defined the concept of mild and severe wear. Mild wear takes place slowly.”

Oliver said “Mild wear is observed at the wheel tread and rail crown. Here the wheel tread is the victim”

I did not understand much. I asked if there is any solution.

Ryan had googled in the meantime “lubrication” he said

“Lubrication is quite expensive but if not done properly, we need to replace the entire compartment which is far more costly. Old days they used to lubricate manually. Nowadays we have automatic lubrication systems in train.” Ryan finished.

“There is lubricating device attached here” Ziro showed the light upon it.

“Weather conditions are of particular concern to these lubricators. The applicator nozzles when not used for a long time in summer starts clogging; this leads to improper functioning of the lubrication system. This problem is frequently faced in many parts of Australia, where summers are hot. Lubricators need to be cleaned before the start of winter in cold countries like Sweden as well. This procedure is important as the nozzles of these lubricators may clog in winter due to no lubrication during winter.”

“Where does the lubrication oil come from?” he asked.

The engine drivers explained about that. The conclusion was the oil has been lost due to clogging. There are now two things to be done.

First, we need to fix the clogging. second, we need more lubrication oil to make the train moving.it was 2.35 am and we were not close to any stations.

“What oil is used for lubrication?” I asked

“For lubricant base oil use, the vegetable derived materials are preferred. Common ones include high oleic canola oil, castor oil, palm oil, sunflower seed oil and rapeseed oil from vegetable, and tall oil from tree sources.” Ryan said.

“Though these oils are prepared in factories and have specification for time being hand made oils can be sufficient”

Idea shot up. “Why can’t we get our resources from nearby green areas?”

Waiter told me “Miss, your idea is fanciful, who knows to prepare the oil”

Ah, I knew the answer. “Of course, I have a plan for that Mr.”

Ryan smiled at me.

“Thomas?” he asked.

We went to wake up Thomas and stated the issue didn’t seem to understand much of it, but he said

“I can prepare oil in 30 mins my child. If that’s what you needed let’s get started.”

The whole compartment was lit. Everyone was awake and was willing to do help of any sort.

We gathered and discussed. It was decided that the students would fix the clogging issue and myself Ryan are going to find seeds to make oil. It was 3.03am. Adolf and Zara offered to help so we decided to go in different directions.

Rebecca and Isabella offered to take care of the children. They were sleeping. I was wondering it would be a good story to tell them. They would be excited, so am I.

We took the needed accessories. Pepper spray for wild animals. Wore bug creams to repel insects. Baskets for collecting seeds about which Thomas have gave us a brief lecture about. We were almost ready. We had our phones charged and Michael gave us the frequency emitter. Using which, he set a frequency that we could hear nothing, but that would sound too much for animals so they won’t come near us.

we planed the zones and split up. It was still dark. Yet moon gave us light. we used torches in phone occasionally.

At first, we were silent, I remembered my dream. It seemed like happening. Only that we weren’t holding hands and No one is around us.

“How do you know my name”

“Well, I was around when you were speaking over phone, you seem so curious, I wonder whether your name is to be maintained a secret?”

“No No” his cheeks dimpled. Thank God, he didn’t accuse me eaves dropping.

“Did you take something for your allergies”

“Ah, I forgot, wait!”

My dress got stuck in thorns of the nearby bush, not just one or two it was sharp and small. I was patiently taking them. Ryan kept aside his things and helped me. “You smell of jasmine” he said.

This time, I smiled.

Then I remembered him saying.

“How did you know that I am having allergies?”

“I saw allergy pills in your bag when you were buying tickets in stationed”

I stood for some seconds reflecting. He went ahead. I ran behind him to keep in pace.

“You ought to be careful Kylie, don’t catch up allergies”. His voice was serious and I didn’t know this amusing man could speak like this.

I nodded.

“Did you find Emma foster”

“Not yet”

“I want to take look at your trunk” I said.

“Always welcome “he said.

“Only until tomorrow morning” I said.

I am sure it disturbed him. I saw the time it was 4.05am. The sun was hideous now. We could move on without torches. I sat by the lake; my legs got sore. Ryan took an empty bottle to bring water. From where I sat, I spotted sunflowers. The opposite side of the lake. Ryan came back with a water.

I drank and felt peace. The taste was nowhere near to the filtered water we get in bottles. He sat beside me. I would have rushed up but I need to gain strength in my legs. Sun was raising up. The whole scene was gorgeous. Now again, I made a quick decision.  Now or never. I showed the sunflower to Ryan. He was excited at the finding. I uttered these words

“You stop nowhere, yet my gaze follows you everywhere. When you vanish out of blue, it seems dark and cold. My petals feel droopy but still I was patiently looking out for you. Now comes the day. Its summer and you give the brightest smile from sky. The dew on my petal gives on a new shine.”

“Like a SUNflower” he said. I shrugged my shoulders. We were smiling and got up to work. We collected the seeds. I informed Adolf and Zara. They have collected some seeds to. It seemed Adolf knee was twisted and Zara was almost breathless as she spoke and walked along by supporting his weight. We were walking back

He gave me a sunflower and said “I like you more than you could imagine”

“Ah, very well, now I could imagine” my face glowed differently.

I was feeling free and myself after a long time. I felt like I could even face the worst disaster in the world with Ryan by my side.

I asked Ryan.

“I Thought you always go for beauty.”

“Oh well, do I look like that(laughing). But I fall for gestures, you know.”

“Yeah, I could see that.”

“But I think it’s better if I change my mind. Between you look good. Tbh more than good. “

We reached the place. Thomas rushed to us. Got the seeds and started the process. I thought of helping him. Rebecca said that she would help Thomas and asked me to rest for a while.

Ryan went to Michael and team. They had almost completed the work. They were enjoying the work. Oliver sprayed the water over Ziro using the sprayer they had for working on clogs, Ziro hands were as black coal and he rushed to Oliver in sweet revenge. There was laughter elsewhere. It felt really good.

I saw the time 6.04am.

Isabella was distributing lemonade, that Thomas brought to everyone working there. I helped her to distribute.

Ryan returned. Noone is allowing me to help. Ryan complained. He was sweating like anything. Yet he was radiant. He gulped down the lemonade.

“You wanna see the trunk, come with me then”

I opened the windows and settled down, he handed me the trunk and sat beside me I told

“you smell of mint” he smiled

“Do I?” he gave a peck on my cheek.

I opened the trunk. Inside I found car toys and few books. They were printed in hard paperback and all these books were fairy tales. I opened the book and was swishing through pages.

“Know what I knew every word memorized in my mind, I could even narrate in my sleep” I could feel pain in those words. He badly wanted to know his real parent’s whereabouts.

I turned to the front page.

The boat publications. Below that the author of the book was Emma foster.

“This is why you have been searching this lady”. He gestured a yes. “This is my first move, I knew its vague, I contacted the publications explained my situation and got the authors details they were working with in the publication year dated back 1987”

Something caught my eye. I was stunned and couldn’t utter a word. I closed the trunk. Took Ryan by hand and rushed to doors just as Isabella climbed in.

“Miss, Are you Emma foster?”

She was shocked, then came a yes in mild voice.

I looked at Ryan. He was out of words. It was his turn.

“Do you write fairy tales?”. In the meantime, I brought the trunk to her. There was stifle.

She wept bitterly. I provided her tissues.

“Ryan took her by shoulder and we sat down in a compartment”

“Emma, why didn’t you tell your original name to me?”

I am living in a changed identity child; I am originally from Russia so is Ryan.

“I am so sorry for your loss, Ryan”. Emma unravelled the mystery.

Ryan was born in a wealthy family. He was an only child. During Soviet Union collapse in 1991, Ryan was 4 years old. I was working there, as a governess for him. Ryan’s father was doing underground co-operation with Ukraine, which Yardley, Ryan’s mother has no idea. When there was a miscommunication. They decided to kill the family. Somehow, we knew the news from a local butcher, who was also a part of it. Poor Yardley sacrificed herself to save Ryan’s life. It was me she pleaded to take Ryan to a safe place. Everything went out as planned except for, I didn’t know I was followed. I was working there for more than 10 years with the family, so I am not to be left out. When we landed in Australia, I was sure they will kill me and in order to safe guard Ryan, who was sleeping at the time, I left him in a ship were families aboard. I put the sleeping Ryan over the trunk and left the place. But by grace I was able to live this long time.

She was touching Ryan’s head. God knows how much I worried for this child. Yardley would be happy on seeing you from heaven. She got up to leave.

Ryan was like stone until she left. He broke open. He cried silently. I knew it must be terrible for him. I just let him be. He finally asked

“How did you find this woman was Emma”

“When I opened the pretext page I saw a poem, which she used to hear in her iPod, sung by his brother”

“She told her name was Isabella but once when I saw her hanky it was lettered as E.”

“So, this little brilliant girl saved me my past mystery.” I smiled with a twinkle in my eyes.

“You don’t are about my past huh? you didn’t ask me anything”

“Anything but whatever I said, you treated me as a pervert, if I had asked what’s your past, you would have pushed me from the train”

He was so serious that I was couldn’t help my laughing.

 “Anyways I don’t care what your past is, now that it’s clear that you are mine”

“Nobody said that, I might be married”

“I don’t think so who would leave such a beautiful wife to travel alone”

‘Ah, that’s enough, let’s get back to the work.”

We went out Thomas waved his hands.

We went near. Lubricant was almost done. clogs were cleared. The young team was cleaning their clothes in nearby lake. I could hear their chuckling sounds.

Rebecca came back with a cassette. These audios are recorded while you were young, you can hear your moms and dads voice in there too. Ryan thanked her like anything.

Ryan asked me what I am planning to do when I land in station.

“I think it’s too early to decide”

He said he is planning to get a job there and spend time with Emma to know his parents.

“What is the young man saying?” Thomas asked.

“He wants to know where I will be residing in the town” I said and strolled a few steps

 “If you want, I can offer you to sell my lemonade and jasmine perfume in gold coast”. Thomas shouted and everyone around heard it. I laughed.

“I wish to water and grow plants with you” I shouted back. I ran towards Thomas and Rebecca. They both hugged me. Ryan took a photograph of we 3 of us. With me putting hands over Thomas and Rebecca shoulders. Roshan and Cerene were awake, came running to us like a storm. Roshan slipped off Cerene helped him to get up. I saw Emma, her eyes were shining.

Well, this journey changed my life. I wish this could stay forever but nonetheless destiny is never settled at a place or situation. destiny is always a journey; I will always be travelling.