I get this perverse feeling when I see her, nervous in her mere presence, she doesn’t know this though. I have this fixed and crazy aphid attraction.
Entering her room today, I wander around and see all the memories we could create, she is my name in her face, her pheromones still linger in the air and the lust hanging over me is too intense to manage so I make my way over to her bed and roll around trying to gain as much of her as humanly possible without her knowing.
The pictures beside her bed paint a picture of the life she leads, the life WE could lead, I need to make this real.
The key turns inside the lock, hiding inside her closet I peer out and see her, I can smell her, almost touch her. So fragile, yet so devious, she has another man with her, the climatic hands that press her temples and my chest. She doesn’t know that we have now entered the night she came home, forever.
She’s the only one that makes me sad.
It is hard to say what caught my attention, its fixed and crazy but the stress is astounding. I feel like a slave and the master that exists through my need to self-oblige. To me she is something in me that I despise but yet somehow love. I won’t let this build up inside of me.
Her carnal needs have been satiated, now for mine.
I sneak out from the closet with no restraints, I am the unchecked collector here to collect what is mine.
The blade enters her ribs and the vermillion, red blood slowly spills out onto my knife.
I hack and slash and hack and slash with no restraints.
To me she isn’t real, I can’t make her real so this is the closest I can get.
I carve her name in my face and the deed is done. Only one thing left to do.
Noose tied, body strewn on the floor, vermillion spilled out everywhere. She’s the only one that makes me sad, tonight was the night she came home forever, now we will be together forever.
I ascend on to this chair, place the noose round my neck, take one last look at the work that I have done, smile then take the longest step of my perverse life.
SNAP.
She’s the only one that makes me sad.
