And I don't want you in my forever

Then why are you on my mind

Why do I remember all the moments

Our lips intertwined.

and it shatters my heart

When I start to remember

How your words pierced through my soul.

Like to you, I didn't even matter.

But will there be a day,

When your name would be just a name,

When I'll let another boy kiss me,

And not wish it was the same?

I hope there's a day

When I run into you on the street

Stares exchanged & I'll walk away

Like you meant nothing to me.

And because I hate you now,

Doesn't mean I never loved you before

And just because you're broken me now,

Doesn't mean you've never healed me before

and I tell all my friends

How I wish you were dead

But do I really mean it?

Or all the words left unsaid?

Because even though

I've closed the door.

And threw away the key.

I still kind of wish

You'd find a way

To run, swim, crawl

Back to me

It's kind of insane

But is it really?

It's easy to tell me to move on,

When I thought I'd marry you at 23.

But I wanna call you up

In a few years when I'm better

I'll meet you for coffee

Like it doesn't matter.

And we'll laugh & joke around

Like you didn't ruin me

Like my heart never dropped and never made a sound

Like you never brewed tears in me.

Because I hate to say

I miss you

I hate to say

I still care.

I hate to say I'd let you back in

If the chances were fair.