Friendships are like drops, which accumulate with time to become an oceanic bond.
Some are lucky in friendships, some are not.
It doesn't mean we don't trust it anymore.
Not all friendships are eternal, some friendships come to life to end and teach us to revive back and change???
This story is dedicated to my two best friends who would always remain a part of my heart; with whom I had created a very strong bond but couldn't retain them.
IN THE CHERISHING MEMORY OF
S.S AND P.S.P
I TOO HAVE HAD BESTFRIENDS
I still remember the day, it was 30th august when I landed in AFN college. Little did I know, it would result in a lifetime experience.
The first day as I sat on the front bench, a group of three boys had come over to talk to me. That one guy who asked me a very practical question, " 270 marks laake iss university mein kyun?". I looked up to see, because that was a very different way of ice-breaking and introduction. There was this cute, innocent, introvert guy who was trying to be friendly. His name was Parth. We didn't interact for some days. Then we had our mid term exams coming up. It was the last day of exam when we had the first proper conversation. I was revising before the exam and in a way he was revising along with me, in between having some light talks. Then there was no communication for ten days. Then on dussehra celebration in our campus, we met again and the bond developed with light jokes. It was an instant friendship that clicked off. It was just very casual without much analysing about how the other person is. After this again there was silence.
Ten days passed by and suddenly one day post lunch he gifted me a chocolate. I was a social media buff at that time, so I flaunted the chocolate on my social media handle. On that he was so miffed with me that we had severe argument. At that point, I had genuinely felt to cut off all ties with him but his " sorry ", his sincere apology with that puppy face didn't allow me to do so. From being normal friends who kept talking, sharing thoughts, fear, grief we became close buddies.
Though the first day I called him bestie, I hadn't meant that but with each passing day, he truly had become one. Around this time we had our economics presentation coming up for which we had been divided inti teams. This team had given me the gem of my life. Though we had interacted a few times in our class group but I had a fear of him. He seemed to be a rude, rough guy, which made me stay away from him. But on 5th November Parth had introduced me to this guy( whom I had tried to stay away from). He was Samarth. The very beginning he started to talk, he seemed a gentleman, a perfect picture of man which you usually have. Then after discussing about presentation for sometime, we went to the college parlour for lassi and chips. That one statement from him, " Ladkiya pay kare achha nhi lagta." Was the hint of his gentleness. On Diwali, for the first time, I had personally, casually had texted him and wished him. That was the first day, the bond of friendship was established.
We were just normal friends but few days later I had a bad fight with Parth.
So it was Parth's birthday party and me, Samarth and few others had gathered around at Mexican chilly. By then I had started considering him as my best friend and in front of all he bought a dairy milk silk and given it to another girl. I was just so hurt, but I somehow controlled my emotions, enjoyed the party and came back. I don't know if it's my negative side but if someone is my close one, I can't bear to share him/her with anyone else. So when I came back home I texted him and told him. Firstly he was confused but then he got angry and was almost on the verge of breaking the friendship and just be batchmates. I was devastated, appalled by it, so I told Samarth that I was feeling low and he immediately provided me his amazon prime ID and asked me to watch a movie and relax. I don't know what happened to me at that instant but I asked him, " will you be my best friend?" . That bond felt so real, and he was that comforting friend who cheers you up in your bad days.
THE BOND SEALED THAT DAY.
Everything became fine with Parth too. We three became a team, a group I thought of cherishing forever. A team I had always dreamt of. It was all perfect.
It was our end semesters approaching and Parth had literally stopped talking to me. I was very upset and didn't know how to appear my exams. I couldn't focus on my studies either. It was my bestie Samarth who constantly motivated me throughout the process and it was because of his relentless support, I was able to appear my exam.
On the last day of the exam, Samarth tried to settle the cold fight between me and parth. I was not angry at him this time, I felt I was just too much intruding into his personal space, so I started to keep a distance, talked less. It was slowly condemning me from inside but I tried to be strong. Then one fine day parth texted and asked me to be like the one I was. He was pained too, that I had become quiet.
We started talking regularly again. Things were fixed and we three started to hang out again. It was fun. Things started to get normal.
But by then parth had started to talk more to another girl of our class and as usual, jealousy took over me. I didn't even realize that in my jealousy, I was being very rude to him. This time he didn't pacify me, he got so angry that he stopped replying to my messages, which worried me. I called him at 2 am at night , he didn't reply saying never to call him again. I couldn't sleep the entire night, he texted in the morning , never to talk to him and I was not his best friend anymore. This sentence put me into depression, I was hapless losing my best friend. I apologized but he didn't pay any heed.
Finally after two days, he texted to say everything was fine. I was so super happy. We, three went out to have tea that afternoon.
The day of my birthday dawned. Both my best friends made my day memorable with cakes, chocolates. Little did I know that was my last birthday celebration with them. That fateful day arrived. It just occurred to me that parth had again started to keep a distance from me. I didn't know what went into my mind that I stated a fake suicide plot. Both of them were angry, upset with me that I thought of suicide, and parted ways. My conscience didn't let me sleep and the very next morning, immediately I rushed to the college to inform them it was all a drama. Parth was the first to react , breaking all ties of friendship stating he could never trust me again. Samarth was upset, quiet and didn't talk to me frequently.
I realized my folly and I tried apologizing in every possible way but a wall had been created which couldn't be broken by my several attempts. The trio was broken, disentangled in the strings of trust, betrayal and repentence.
Samarth has started to keep at bay from me. I know the reason. He fears I am too possessive about everything. He has always supported as a friend and I know he will always do that. When Parth was ignoring me, it was Samarth who always showed me the reality of life, guided me, held me like a child and helped to get out somewhat from my depression. He is a real man, a real diamond; people lucky enough would have in their lives. I was not that lucky to keep him holding in my life. He was my liitle friend infront of whom I could be a child without any judgements.
I have become alone again, penning down my emotions in the form of writing. This heartbreak will always be in my life, even though I would never show it to the world. The gems I had got are lost, with that the light of happiness is gone. Fingers crossed, I still hope everything I fanticize will be real, but somewhere deep down my heart, the pangs of despair and longingness still linger.
Some are lucky in friendships, some are not.
It doesn't mean we don't trust it anymore.
Not all friendships are eternal, some friendships come to life to end and teach us to revive back and change???
This story is dedicated to my two best friends who would always remain a part of my heart; with whom I had created a very strong bond but couldn't retain them.
IN THE CHERISHING MEMORY OF
S.S AND P.S.P
I TOO HAVE HAD BESTFRIENDS
I still remember the day, it was 30th august when I landed in AFN college. Little did I know, it would result in a lifetime experience.
The first day as I sat on the front bench, a group of three boys had come over to talk to me. That one guy who asked me a very practical question, " 270 marks laake iss university mein kyun?". I looked up to see, because that was a very different way of ice-breaking and introduction. There was this cute, innocent, introvert guy who was trying to be friendly. His name was Parth. We didn't interact for some days. Then we had our mid term exams coming up. It was the last day of exam when we had the first proper conversation. I was revising before the exam and in a way he was revising along with me, in between having some light talks. Then there was no communication for ten days. Then on dussehra celebration in our campus, we met again and the bond developed with light jokes. It was an instant friendship that clicked off. It was just very casual without much analysing about how the other person is. After this again there was silence.
Ten days passed by and suddenly one day post lunch he gifted me a chocolate. I was a social media buff at that time, so I flaunted the chocolate on my social media handle. On that he was so miffed with me that we had severe argument. At that point, I had genuinely felt to cut off all ties with him but his " sorry ", his sincere apology with that puppy face didn't allow me to do so. From being normal friends who kept talking, sharing thoughts, fear, grief we became close buddies.
Though the first day I called him bestie, I hadn't meant that but with each passing day, he truly had become one. Around this time we had our economics presentation coming up for which we had been divided inti teams. This team had given me the gem of my life. Though we had interacted a few times in our class group but I had a fear of him. He seemed to be a rude, rough guy, which made me stay away from him. But on 5th November Parth had introduced me to this guy( whom I had tried to stay away from). He was Samarth. The very beginning he started to talk, he seemed a gentleman, a perfect picture of man which you usually have. Then after discussing about presentation for sometime, we went to the college parlour for lassi and chips. That one statement from him, " Ladkiya pay kare achha nhi lagta." Was the hint of his gentleness. On Diwali, for the first time, I had personally, casually had texted him and wished him. That was the first day, the bond of friendship was established.
We were just normal friends but few days later I had a bad fight with Parth.
So it was Parth's birthday party and me, Samarth and few others had gathered around at Mexican chilly. By then I had started considering him as my best friend and in front of all he bought a dairy milk silk and given it to another girl. I was just so hurt, but I somehow controlled my emotions, enjoyed the party and came back. I don't know if it's my negative side but if someone is my close one, I can't bear to share him/her with anyone else. So when I came back home I texted him and told him. Firstly he was confused but then he got angry and was almost on the verge of breaking the friendship and just be batchmates. I was devastated, appalled by it, so I told Samarth that I was feeling low and he immediately provided me his amazon prime ID and asked me to watch a movie and relax. I don't know what happened to me at that instant but I asked him, " will you be my best friend?" . That bond felt so real, and he was that comforting friend who cheers you up in your bad days.
THE BOND SEALED THAT DAY.
Everything became fine with Parth too. We three became a team, a group I thought of cherishing forever. A team I had always dreamt of. It was all perfect.
It was our end semesters approaching and Parth had literally stopped talking to me. I was very upset and didn't know how to appear my exams. I couldn't focus on my studies either. It was my bestie Samarth who constantly motivated me throughout the process and it was because of his relentless support, I was able to appear my exam.
On the last day of the exam, Samarth tried to settle the cold fight between me and parth. I was not angry at him this time, I felt I was just too much intruding into his personal space, so I started to keep a distance, talked less. It was slowly condemning me from inside but I tried to be strong. Then one fine day parth texted and asked me to be like the one I was. He was pained too, that I had become quiet.
We started talking regularly again. Things were fixed and we three started to hang out again. It was fun. Things started to get normal.
But by then parth had started to talk more to another girl of our class and as usual, jealousy took over me. I didn't even realize that in my jealousy, I was being very rude to him. This time he didn't pacify me, he got so angry that he stopped replying to my messages, which worried me. I called him at 2 am at night , he didn't reply saying never to call him again. I couldn't sleep the entire night, he texted in the morning , never to talk to him and I was not his best friend anymore. This sentence put me into depression, I was hapless losing my best friend. I apologized but he didn't pay any heed.
Finally after two days, he texted to say everything was fine. I was so super happy. We, three went out to have tea that afternoon.
The day of my birthday dawned. Both my best friends made my day memorable with cakes, chocolates. Little did I know that was my last birthday celebration with them. That fateful day arrived. It just occurred to me that parth had again started to keep a distance from me. I didn't know what went into my mind that I stated a fake suicide plot. Both of them were angry, upset with me that I thought of suicide, and parted ways. My conscience didn't let me sleep and the very next morning, immediately I rushed to the college to inform them it was all a drama. Parth was the first to react , breaking all ties of friendship stating he could never trust me again. Samarth was upset, quiet and didn't talk to me frequently.
I realized my folly and I tried apologizing in every possible way but a wall had been created which couldn't be broken by my several attempts. The trio was broken, disentangled in the strings of trust, betrayal and repentence.
Samarth has started to keep at bay from me. I know the reason. He fears I am too possessive about everything. He has always supported as a friend and I know he will always do that. When Parth was ignoring me, it was Samarth who always showed me the reality of life, guided me, held me like a child and helped to get out somewhat from my depression. He is a real man, a real diamond; people lucky enough would have in their lives. I was not that lucky to keep him holding in my life. He was my liitle friend infront of whom I could be a child without any judgements.
I have become alone again, penning down my emotions in the form of writing. This heartbreak will always be in my life, even though I would never show it to the world. The gems I had got are lost, with that the light of happiness is gone. Fingers crossed, I still hope everything I fanticize will be real, but somewhere deep down my heart, the pangs of despair and longingness still linger.
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