Hello,
It’s me, Taehyung.
I hope you remember me.
If only you knew how many years I spent wondering whether it was worth writing this letter. And now, after all these years, I couldn’t bear the deafening silence any longer. In the middle of the night, I suddenly rose from bed and began to write.
There is so much I want to tell you, but it’s not easy…
I don’t even know where to begin, or where to end…
All I know is that my childhood years haunt me—both in my waking life and in dreams. They come to me like visions in the chill of the night.
The cracked walls of the orphanage, the faded blankets, the creaking wooden floors under every step, the sweet smell of freshly baked pastries…
The three of us, wrapped in blankets on a cool spring midnight, chasing fluttering insects in the light, laughing, until our stomachs would grumble. You’d sneak into the kitchen and steal the dumplings hidden so carefully—so masterfully it was as if you’d been doing it your whole life.
If only you knew how much I miss those distant years…
A great sorrow and loss intertwined our fates.
First it was me and Guki, and then, a few years later, you.
With your messy hair and dusty, worn-out shoes, you appeared in our lives so suddenly—and from that day on, you clung to our souls with your tiny hands.
I heard that you got married, and you’re very happy.
Believe me, I’m truly happy to hear that.
After all, I witnessed the pure, untainted feeling between you two.
Guki and I grew up like brothers. He was younger, so everyone paid more attention to him. As he grew, he became clever, capable—everything he touched, he did perfectly.
I was always proud of Guki. I never envied him.
Except for that one moment—when I first saw the way you looked at him.
With eyes full of love.
You looked at him and smiled, your emerald-green eyes shining.
In that moment, I would have given anything—just once—for you to look at me the same way.
That’s when I decided to leave.
I couldn’t stand between you.
After many sleepless nights, at dawn I quietly packed my faded shirts and the one pair of carefully polished shoes I owned. I tiptoed through the creaky hallway, holding my breath, and only paused for a moment at the threshold. I didn’t look back—
Because I knew, if I saw you there, I wouldn’t be able to leave.
The guilt never left me.
Leaving like that, without warning, without goodbye…
Now that I’ve started to find gray in my hair, I’ve finally dared to write this letter—
As if it might redeem my silence. As if it might heal the torn piece of my heart.
Please, understand me. Don’t think I’m confessing love after all these years.
I just want to say thank you—
For the feeling you gave me in childhood,
For each memory,
And for who I’ve become, thanks to you both.
I want you to know—I’m happy.
I met her. The one.
She’s beautiful, energetic, full of love—and just a little strange.
From the very first meeting, I knew she was the one. And it even hurt a little, how easily I forgot you.
We got married.
We have three daughters.
I tell them stories every day—about a green-eyed girl and a mischievous boy.
They’re dying to meet you…
Last week, I happened to find myself in that distant town where it all began.
The moment I stepped across the threshold of our old orphanage yard, memories swallowed me whole.
Every detail was so familiar—and yet completely foreign.
They told me… you and Guki got married…
And later, you had a son.
You named him Taehyung.
When I heard that, it was like the ground disappeared beneath my feet.
All these years I thought you had forgotten me,
And yet… you gave your child my name.
A storm of long-buried emotions erupted in my heart,
and my wrinkled face was soaked in hot tears.
The memories torment me.
I miss those childhood years.
And I regret that our paths parted the way they did.
Now, I have only one dream—
That our children will one day be as close as we once were,
In those distant times,
When we didn’t yet know what pain was,
Or sorrow, or hardship,
Or the injustice of life.
With all my heart, I hope this letter reaches you—
And maybe, someday,
You’ll be able to forgive me…
Goodbye.
It’s me, Kim Taehyung.
I hope you still remember me.
