it all started when i had a dad and he was diagnosed with a lot diseases but he was a faithful man , he could be dying and yet believe in GOD he once said that everything happens because he prayed : he said"i prayed for courage"and GOD gave me trouble to deal with, "i prayed for strength" and GOD gave me problems to make strong and " i prayed for love " and GOD gave me troubled people to help so GOD answered all my prayers .

then on 12th/january , he was so sick in the hospital and he couldn't even open his eyes but i could here him whisper underneath his breath saying"i can't burry it with me please GOD let me rest" at the moment as i looked at him i noticed that he will never be cured and at 1am in the night , he woke up gasping for breath but then the look in his eyes told me he was dying .

at 1:30am he woked up again and said "i saw God " for that moment i had believed he was going to die and i told him "sleep he's with you" after 15 minutes he said could you sing me a song and i said yes "i hear you whisper underneath your breath , i hear your sos , your sos but i will send out an army to find you in the middle of the darkest night it's true i will rescue you ." he was singing in his strength and he took a deep breath one and out , two and out , three and out , god gave him rest as i stood there i felt like my bones were breaking each one of them i felt dizzy so i layed on the ground not knowing to cry or die with him but i knew he was really gone by that time.

i could get that in my dreams and gasp for breath too until when i couldn't sleep anymore i could just remember him everyday and miss him everytime but then i wrote a letter to god "Hey lord"

dear lord,

if roses grow in heaven please pick a bunch for me place them in my father's arms and tell him they're from me , tell him i love him and miss him and when he turns to smile place a kiss upon his head as i used to give him , remembering him is easy i do it everyday but there's an ache within my heart that would never go away.

NIGHTMARE

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