Now that I’m older I’ve realized that you must truly love yourself or you’ll find yourself trying to justify why you’re allowing someone to treat you like you’re nothing. I’ve learned that I was really her all along, but I was dealing with guys that I posed a threat to my intelligence and hustle attracted and intimidated them at the same time. I was making little boys feel like grown men by making myself smaller and showing any type of strength challenged them. I was so busy loving them and trying to stroke their egos, I didn’t realize I had said fuck me along time ago. I had to tighten up and tap into me and learn that people will really treat you how you allow them to or think they are getting away with some shit. They will take your love for granted and talk down on you when they’re broken inside, treat you like you’re an option when you’re really pressure. It was my job to show and still show that. I don’t need to justify anyone’s behaviors instead I need to focus on my own. I know now my true worth and will never allow anyone to treat me the way I have in the past. I have been by myself for a long time now and noticed that yes I have been smiling but now I’m smiling and I’m at peace, no more justifying!