Romance is in the Air
KEV TRIED TO SHAKE off the uncomfortable feeling that worse was to follow. He had spent too long with evil thoughts and nasty dreams. At last, Kevʼs far happier thoughts returned to his Thai language teacher. He had kept his emotions in check with her, but he now felt he had to make a move. Difficult, he thought, getting the language school started would be easier. And beginning the school would mean they would spend much more time together. So he would start with the school. Then, decide what he should do next.
Kev's Thai teacher had the unusual nickname Skylab. Her grandmother named her that because she would not stay put; she was always on the move. She was petite, had thick jet-black hair, and a smile that could melt an igloo.
At the moment, she was only teaching one hour a day; she spent the rest of her time helping at the guest house. A determined Kev marched into the guest house. He asked to meet with the family to explain his idea about the school. Explaining that Skylab and he would often be together. They all got the wrong idea. They thought he meant something else, something different! The Thai language has many plays on words. Specific phrases can have two meanings, but Kevʼs ability did not stretch that far. Possibly, they got the right idea. He had mangled his Thai language in his tongue-tied effort to explain about the school. Something else had slipped out. Indeed, his command of the Thai language was not that bad. Kev reddened; things were not going as planned, and he asked to be excused. He turned and almost ran out. Leaving a room full of sniggering people trying hard but failing to keep straight faces.
Now he had a problem - what to do? He had powerful feelings for Skylab. Was he asking them to allow him to marry her? The family thought so. Or were they playing with him? He had not even kissed her, let alone anything else.
Kev needed to talk to somebody. Who? Nick would not understand; Dam was too young to ask, or was he?
'I thought you'd want to talk to me, eventually. Go ahead, fire away,' said the perceptive young lad.
'You are single and young, but you are Thai, so can you give me advice? I donʼt know what to do.' Kev explained what had happened.
'Are you English so very different? There are girls you can sleep with and those you cannot; those you canʼt are the ones you marry. Clear.'
That was about as clear as a Bangkok klong.
They told Kev he could "walk" with Skylab, but a family member had to be present. That would generally be acceptable, but what if they worked in the same office?
'Oh, that's okay, that's for work.'
Things did not get clearer for Kev, but everybody seemed pleased with the way things were turning out.
After the fright on returning from the jungle, his poor command of the Thai language caused confusion. Kev's life soon returned to normal: day-to-day repair jobs, chasing new sales, meeting more people and not forgetting language lessons.
Another job landed in their laps. An elderly Englishman had fallen in love with a bar worker. The Englishman was a gent of the "old school", meaning no sex before marriage.
Roy left his hotel and spotted Kev's office. The man's mind was already made up. He walked in and asked for a few minutes of the boss's time. They welcomed him in and offered him a seat. As a cup of Skylab's finest arrived, Roy explained his wish to marry the new love of his life. Roy was getting over the untimely death of his English wife of forty-five years.
His friends had suggested a holiday. The only problem was that no one would go with him. Roy had said, 'Sod 'em all, I'll go on my own.'
A cheeky lad in the travel agents suggested Thailand.
'There are some wonderful sights,' he said with a leer. And after recently, he heard about the nightlife in Bangkok. So, more in jest than anything else, he highly recommended Thailand. His commission would be more significant for a long-haul trip. Roy took the brochures. He read about the region, the weather, and The Bridge on the River Kwai. Plus, the sights the country offered. It sold him. Hua Hin was a superb place to kick off his holiday and forget the last traumatic year.
Roy had a lot of questions for Kev. The key problem was how to get Roy's new girlfriend back to England. Kev had asked Skylab to join the meeting. She was to act as Kev's secretary, which would look more professional. Skylab suggested that she and Kev should visit the girlfriend, Suzi, at her place of work. It was a valid thought; it would save all the 'I dunno' replies they were getting from Roy.
Kev led Skylab to a bar stool. Roy looked around, waiting for Suzi to appear. Soft drinks arrived. Roy explained that on his first night in town, he found this bar and was thrilled to spend two hours in Suzi's company. He had made his mind up there and then; she was to be the future Mrs Roy Jones.
'That was last night.'
Skylab almost choked on her fruit juice.
Eventually, Suzi appeared, heavily made up even though it was only midmorning, dressed in a ball gown, all glitter and feathers. Roy began burbling.
They did not need to speak as Kev and Skylab's eyes met. Their looks said it all: Some tactful talking would be required, and Roy would need to listen carefully. Skylab pulled Suzi aside.
Kev thought deeply before he said, 'Don't you think you are rushing things?'
'I have never been so sure of anything before.'
That was a conversation-stopper. Roy had decided.
Skylab was not getting much further with Suzi, who said.
'If he loves me well, he can pay for my operation.'
Suzi had a deep voice, which Roy found sexy.
Skylab left things as they were. Kev agreed to meet Roy sometime soon. They left the lovebirds cuddling at the bar.
After that interesting start to the day, Skylab went back to the office. Kev and Nick had been invited round to the French girl's place. Emma and Gi wanted to show off their recent project. If before there were a few dogs, now there were dozens.
'What in God's name are you going to do with all these mangey creatures?
'We will clean them up and find people to love them.'
There is about as much chance of that as Jan selling cheese or Roy finding a real woman.
The girls were keen to start their dog shelter, which meant another job for Nick to consider. The girls had found a piece of empty land to rent, wanted it fenced off and divided into enormous cages. Kev thought it ideal for Dam's first solo job.
'See what he can do alone. Iʼm sure he will be fine, maybe he should get a mate along to help with the labouring?'
'Great thinking, Kev. Dam will do a fine job of this,' agreed Nick.
The French girls, Nick, Kev, and Dam, went to the land and measured up. Dam was shy but soon took control, sending Kev with the tape measure around the perimeter. Soon, a design was decided upon. Nick was busy scribbling ideas on the back of an envelope. The dogs would have an extensive area to run in, shelter from the sun or rain and an isolation area for sick animals.
'There should also be a place for "unfriendly" animals to exist alone,' was Nick's unhelpful comment.
'You can always put them down.'
Emma pointed out they were in a Buddhist country, and you could kill nothing!
'Yeah, right,' thought Kev.
It seemed that the girls had a sponsor for their plan. They agreed on the budget, and Dam would start the following day. Little did Dam, Kev, Nick, or even Gi know that Pi Meow was the sponsor. The Thai man had enjoyed watching Emma walk the dogs along the beach past his house every morning.
Dam might be a little shy, but he was a man of hidden talents. He had not told his bosses, but he could play the guitar and boy, could he play. He had turned up at work with another family member as his helper, tools, materials, and his guitar. The girls were more interested in the music than the fence.
'Why is the fence job taking so long?' Nick asked. Dam refused to make eye contact with his boss.
'It's more tricky than I first thought, but tomorrow should see it finished.'
'Do you want me to come tomorrow?' Nick asked. Damʼs' answer came too quickly.
'Thanks, but no need.'
Nick was wondering what was going on.
'Kev, tomorrow I want you to come to the dog pound with me, okay,' said Nick.
'Dam can handle it Iʼm sure?'
They looked in to see how things were going.
There was no sign of the girls or the boys. The fence surrounding it was in place and looked like a professional job. The dogs are all cheerful enough.
'Where is everyone?'
As Kev and Nick looked around, they left the pound and went to the beach house. They heard guitar music and cheery voices from upstairs, so Nick and Kev left them to it.
'Lucky devils,' thought Nick.
Kev, Dam and his cousin, the French girls, and Skylab were all paired off. That left Nick alone. Nick had never found himself an actual girlfriend; there were one or two flings, but nothing serious. It would be no fun being on your own.
Kev asked Skylab to be a secretary again and to join him at the Star Bar. He wanted to see if any money could be gained from Roy.
'Look, Skylab, I'm not being greedy. But we have spent time with the odd couple, so we should earn something. Can we find them a house or something?'
As they wandered into the poorly lit bar, they saw Roy sitting alone with his head in his hands.
'Good, it seems Roy knows the truth about Suzi,' said Skylab.
'Let's ask him,' said Kev.
'Hi Roy, what's the problem? You look very glum,' Skylab asked as Kev cringed.
'It's Suzi, she needs an operation.'
Kev and Skylab looked at each other.
'Oh, it's so sad,' carried on Roy. 'She can't have children, you know?'
'No? You surprise me.' Kev said, earning a slap.
'Um, what kind of operation does she need?' tactfully queried Skylab.
'Oh, you know, a lady's op.'
Suzi joined them, worried that Kev could cause her a problem.
'Hello, darling,' she whispered in Roy's ear. A big smile spread across Roy's face.
'You know, I've been thinking, maybe it is better we don't have children; it's sad for you, being a young lady. But we can spend more time together.'
Skylab asked Suzi a question, hoping she would make a mistake that would reveal the truth to Roy.
'Suzi, would you like to travel? England, for example?'
'I love to travel.'
'Really? Where have you been?'
'I went to Malaysia last year; it was lovely.'
'Yes, I've heard it's a magnificent place to visit. You should give your passport to Roy, and he and Kev can help you fix up your trip to England.'
'Er, no, I would prefer to make the arrangements myself. Thank you.'
Kev joined in, 'You need a visa to go to Britain. Will that be a problem? You know you will need Roy to sponsor you.'
'Hey, you two, what with all the questions?' asked Roy, becoming ruffled.
'Oh, nothing, Roy. You will be expected to go with Suzi to the Embassy to get a visa, though.'
When Kev and Skylab were in the bar, a young man watched and tried to listen to their conversation.
'Excuse me, Suzi, but who is that guy sitting at the bar?'
'Nobody, he's just the bar owner.'
'He is very interested in you.'
'I have this certain attractiveness, it seems,' she said.
Kev turned to Skylab and whispered in her ear. 'This is spiralling out of control; I have an unpleasant feeling. Please go back to the office. Ask Nick to come and join me here. I'll need him.'
For once, Skylab did what was requested without a query. She hurried off to fetch Nick.
'Roy, you have only been in Thailand for five minutes. So maybe you don't know, but these people are setting you up.'
'Can't you see genuine love when it's right in front of your face?' Roy asked.
'Can't you see a girl with a dick when she and it are right in front of your face?'
There was a sad look from Roy to Suzi. The truth finally hit home. Kev thought he had been too much to the point. There was a shrug from Suzi. She stepped back, allowing her boss through. Roy stood with sunken shoulders and a tear in his eye. He left the bar.
Kev was sorry he spoke so bluntly but guessed it was for the best. He stood ready to leave.