I’m in the office, lying on the floor. There’s a weight on top of me. I want to scream, but I can’t. I have no voice. I taste blood in my mouth. I look up and see that face laughing, his evil look. He’s panting like a dog on top of me, his alcohol-scented breath filling my nostrils. I try to move, but I can’t. I hear him unzipping his pants and telling me not to move. I’m scared, so scared!
I wake up screaming, all sweaty and crying! I look all around, but I don’t see anything. The panic I feel momentarily blinds me, but a “Shhhh… Calm down, it was just a nightmare, I’m here.” begins to soothe me, and I start to come to my senses. Leonard is sitting on the floor next to the bed, and Claire is standing there looking at me in anguish. They were both here with me, even while I was sleeping. My eyes burn. Claire approaches and Leonard makes room for her. She hugs me, as if she were a mother.
Leonard leaves, saying he’ll ask to bring me something to eat, while I go to the bathroom and take a hot shower. Claire helps me out of bed. As soon as I stand up, I’m overcome by a strong dizziness. I feel dizzy, but Claire grabs me, leading me slowly to the bathroom.
As soon as I lift my head, I look up at burgundy walls, just like the ones in the bedroom, but the floor is a shiny dark green marble. We have a view of the vineyards as we bathe in a round tub shaped like a barrel. When we turn on the water, it pours out in a cascade. There’s also an inviting shower stall with multiple jets. It feels like I’m in another world. The sinks are made of cork-like material with matte black faucets, and the warm yellow ambient light creates an atmosphere that’s as luxurious as it is romantic.
Claire struggles to turn on the water in the tub, but eventually figures it out, and the bathroom is flooded with the sound of water.
As soon as the tub fills and the steam brushes against my naked skin, I step into the water and sink into it. Claire leaves me alone, assuring me she’s on the other side of the door in case I need anything.
I look at the magnificent view without being able to appreciate it. Everything could be so different. I might never have run into Leonard, I might never have gone to the spa, I might never have had too much to drink. But that’s just how life is, and everything happens for a reason.
I start lathering my hair; the scent of chamomile is so pleasant that my thoughts evaporate. Next I wash my body; I start slowly at my neck, feeling the pain even as I run my fingers gently over it, then one shoulder at a time, my breasts, my stomach; and I stop. I have flashes of that man forcing his way between my legs, touching me against my will, trying to rip off my panties. I feel my eyes burning with the threat of tears, and a wave of disgust and anger wells up. Suddenly I wash my thighs and legs—bruised and battered—over and over, scrubbing nonstop, scraping with my nails until I no longer feel that disgusting touch. Only when I start to feel pain and see the scratches bleeding do I feel even slightly clean. That’s enough for today.
I finish my shower and dry myself with a towel. I notice a toothbrush and toothpaste and focus on brushing my teeth. I hear a soft murmur coming from the bedroom and open the door slowly. I see Claire and Leonard deep in conversation, oblivious to me. They’re talking about me, who’s staying here to be with me. I cough to get their attention, and they both fall silent.
- Oh, Blair, you’re done already! How are you feeling?
Claire puts on a relaxed expression.
- Better.
- Mr. Par…, I mean, Leonard brought you something to eat. You need to regain your strength.
I look at the desk and see fresh orange juice, grapes, a steaming porcelain teapot, a selection of teas, white and rye bread, cheese and ham, butter, and jams.
- You didn’t need to go to all this trouble; just some tea and a few cookies would have been enough.
I look at him and smile, a little embarrassed. I slowly make my way to the table, afraid of falling.
- Of course you need it. – He replies. – You haven’t eaten anything in quite a while, that’s why you’re feeling dizzy. The doctor is coming here in about an hour to see how you’re… What happened to your legs?!
His look of shock and the change in his tone make me stop and follow his gaze. Shit, I forgot I was wrapped in a towel and that my legs were clearly visible.
I turn pale; I can’t look at him.
- Umm… it’s nothing, don’t worry. It was me… I did it while washing myself. But I’m really fine.
I force a reassuring smile and see his stern gaze and his flaring nostrils. He’s holding himself back. He just nods at me and tells us he’ll be back in a little while with the doctor. Then he leaves the room and closes the door.
I sit down in the chair and Claire does the same beside me. She eats grapes while I sip orange juice and nibble on some plain bread. We both sit in silence for long seconds. I know Claire is dying to speak up; I know her too well.
- Speak up.
- What?
- Spill it.
- Me? I don’t have anything to say. You’re wrong.
She pops two more grapes into her mouth, as if to stop herself from speaking.
- Claire, speak up.
- Fine, okay! I think your boss is head over heels for you.
She says with her mouth full.
- What? You’re crazy. He’s only doing all this because of everything that happened. And because I’m his employee.
- It’s not quite like that. Jonathan told me he went crazy looking for you because he wanted to tell you that the staff knew… about your secret. – She avoids looking at me; she doesn’t know how to bring it up without hurting me. – So when he walked into the gym, he ran right into him as he was leaving and asked him about you—that’s when they saw that creep running toward the elevator. They realized right away that you were inside, but they weren’t quick enough to stop the elevator. Jonathan said that from then on he went crazy, ordering the security guards to head to the floor where the elevator stopped and telling the camera crew to keep an eye on all the cameras and find you. He almost destroyed the elevator button from pressing it so many times!
I’m not quite sure how to feel about all this information. I feel grateful, of course, but I also feel a little overvalued. I don’t want to harbor any kind of affection for my boss, the most desired womanizer. The wine magnate. I can’t make that mistake.
- Don't make a big deal out of it, please, Claire. He acted that way because he found out about my secret himself. And, apparently, being a virgin at 28 is something men find desirable. – I downplay it. – And I honestly think he also wanted to join the group of people who wanted to take it from me.
I drink the rest of the orange juice. I have to come back down to earth. The truth is painful, but I can’t romanticize his behavior. Even if Claire doesn’t know everything that happened between us before, she’s aware of Leonard’s reputation. And so am I.
- Even so, you have to admit that this is too much for someone who doesn’t want anything to do with you.
I don’t answer, because I have no answer. The truth is, I don’t know if this is the kind of treatment he gives his conquests.
- I don’t think you’re seeing how much care he’s taking with you.
She gets up and walks over to the wall next to the bed, near the bathroom. Just when I think the doctor is coming for her—because she’s hallucinating—she presses the wall, and it opens. It’s a door! I get up and follow her, coming face-to-face with every woman’s dream: a huge walk-in closet! We go inside and I look around in amazement: coats, shirts, and skirts all organized by color, high heels, loafers, and even running shoes. There are silk nightgowns ranging from beige and red to pure black. Jeans and black leggings in the drawers. I open a drawer and find several lace bras in different colors. I feel the embarrassment rising to my face. In the drawer below are the matching lace panties, in various styles and shapes. I look at Claire and she looks at me, with that smug look of someone who was right. I keep insisting on my theory.
- This must belong to another woman. That’s why it’s here.
- You’re wrong. He made a point of asking what size trousers you wear and your panty sizes and so on…
I look at her, shocked.
- And you told him?
- Of course! I thought he just wanted to know so he could get you some clean clothes for when you woke up here and we left; I didn’t think it was to renovate your wardrobe!
I roll my eyes at her; I don’t have the money to pay for all this. This is a small fortune! I’d have to work for at least two years, without spending a dime, to pay for it.
I grab the black nightgown and some black panties. I say no to bras, for now. I take the towel off my hair and dry it. I don’t fuss over it too much because there’s no need. It’s hard for me to look in the mirror with the band-aid on my cheek and the finger marks on my throat. As I finish, Claire hands me a robe; as soon as I put it on, there’s a knock at the door. It’s Leonard and the doctor.