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Prologue of my novel

3 votes, average: 2.33 out of 53 votes, average: 2.33 out of 53 votes, average: 2.33 out of 53 votes, average: 2.33 out of 53 votes, average: 2.33 out of 5    2.33/5
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June 18th 2012  |  2  |  Category: Romantic Love  |  Author: ninadsapre  |  506 views

Hey don’t cry sweetheart what happened to you ?  Please tell . i am there  for you  tell me what happened? is there any serious problem ?

I can’t tell.  you will leave me she said.

I will not, no one can separate us . i promise I will not leave u.

She called me her place.

When I reached. there was too much activities going I saw a police jeep with 5-6 police men. i rushed towards her home.  when I entered her house her mother came and  started to cry on my chest. she said “everything is finished”.

I asked what happened?

I hold her and tried to stop my girlfriend  mother’s tears .i tried to stop her from crying,

I asked her what happened?

where is tia ?

She started to cry again .mine heart beat raised too high. I was surrounded by heavy bulk of thought. What happened  to her. Pessimism was all over my mind. However I gathered some courage to ask police inspector, what happened? Look Mr vansh we are really sorry for what had happened. miss tia has………….i grabbed police inspector by collar with both hand .

What r u doing? He yelled

How can u say this? I know your situation Mr. Vansh but this is truth.

 

Where is Tia? I asked her mother .

She is in her room .

I rushed toward her room .The door was slightly opened.i was literally sobbing, however I gathered courage to sneak inside .Inside room was pitch black.i could only see tia half side of face. Light coming from ventilator forced tears to sparkle. I pushed door to open, tia was in her thought deeply.even she didn’t noticed me. i said  Tia. i went to her  I hold her with  both hand  and gave her a tight hug,her head was resting on my chest,  she was crying.

Her eyes were red due to crying I hold her hand and said look at me .She looked. But  she said, i closed her mouth everything will be fine we will handle this situation . She pushed me away .i hugged her and emotion was were playing their part. i was crying too. Please, I asked her

who were they?

she dragged me out of the room…. and then she locked herself in her room…alone

i was standing there numb…..

millions of thoughts were crossing my mind………

i felt dizzy…..

i  rushed down and asked police officer did u know anything about them ? .He said we are searching them. i crossed hall i paid no attention towards anybody..i just walked out….

i dont knew now where i have to go……it was catastrophe for me….my heart was plundered and murdered….i didnt knew anything i was just driving my bike…..

thoughts  every where!!!!!

i yelled without thinking…….

boommmm bash bhashboom…

my eyelids were fighting with nervous system and brain…i felt like some one stabbed something…with my eyes literally open…i saw blood was everywhere.i was drowning in the pool of blood…..everything was paused……endless white place…..

i was in hospital when i opened my eyes….

dr was yelling at attendants..

i was again surrounded my white place desert only thing i remembered was tia’s face..and   tears falling from her eyes which were making a water body and in which i will be  drowned sooner or later.


comment on it..

 

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2 Responses to Prologue of my novel

  1. Avatar of Ami Ami says:

    what a romantic Story. i love it.

  2. Avatar of jls685 jls685 says:

    I’m sorry that I have to leave a negative reply but I don’t think you should be writing in English (if it is indeed your second language, which it seems to be) if you do not yet understand that “I” has to be capitalized and how to use past, present, and future tenses. If you are not a native English speaker than I would say, do not write in English, write in your native language first and then translate to English if you want. This should help a lot with grammar and other things. I think your story has potential though! I just think that you need to work on a few fundamental rules of the language before you should try serious writing (if this is indeed the prologue for a novel).

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